fefkat makes me go absolutely FERAL. no matter what quadrant it is (though i lean pale bc. I Am Who I Am) just. auyduygugh. the potential. the fucking potential.
they are both destined to die on the same day. they are so intertwined and also doomed by the narrative that it hurts me, like, physically. karkat is the only one who knows that they are both going to die and hes too terrified to say anything. shes the nicest girl on earth hes the grouchiest bitchiest bitch to live. in another life he was kind and she was cruel and she had him tortured to death Until he became furious.
karkats one interraction with feferi in the murderstuck memo is. tellingly tragic. no such tears are spared for anyone else, its more just fear than anything
they are both destined to be murdered or in some way destroyed by the system they are in. they both Desperately want to fix this, and desperately have a secret - far less kind desire - to just assimilate.
maybe one of them gets to live.
maybe karkat watches her get slaughtered, helplessly, and then, somehow, manages to trick the drones. becomes a model thresexcutioner. but, when he sleeps, he is always thinking of how feferis blood splattered fuschia - so close to red, when he looked, when he watched the feed of the battle, and wonders when it will be him.
maybe feferi wins the battle, maybe she has "halt all cullings" on her tongue, as her first command, when she does, bathed in fuschia, but eridan has been telling her that that would be a horrible first move, and, well, she can say it later, and think it through better, so she falls silent, and later that evening karkats cold and dead corpse is dropped at her feet. like she should be excited, like this is ok, like, she can fix this later, like any amount of years fixing the system will ever make up for karkats cold and dead body spilling red, her first mistake-
they make me sick. for my point.
but i like thinking about some incredibly incomprehensible happy ending. because i think that can be sickening and stressful too. the ending where feferis been watching karkat, for years, knowing something was different in him, started falling in this weird one sided pale-crush after her break up with eridan and, on the day she survives the battle, she messages him. mentions how hes very honest, and smart, and, whale, karcrab, shes been fin-king abt getting herself a roy-eel advis-oar 8)? and when hes brought to her, all small and stubby and oh, look at his eyes. theyre.. already turning red. red. ah, that explains a lot.
karkat breaking down. sobbing like hes gonna throw up, face scrunched and red and making fefs heart pound pale as he says, i didnt want to die. and fef getting on the ground with him and tugging her arms around him and going yeah, yeah. i really didnt want to either. im glad we didnt.
so anyway i think im going to write a fanfiction.
