♡XOFRNK♡

Together they create the full set.

tumblr black out poetry

actually supervillains with kid hero nemeses are hysterical bc if i was a billionaire and i found out the kid who was also my nemesis was a preteen orphan i would simply adopt them. oh you’re going to stop my nefarious schemes? how when you’re grounded. go to your room

the trick is be a good parent so they don’t wanna fight you. son if you topple my criminal empire how will i pay for your college? reverse batmanning

Weaponized guilt. Son you’re out on a school night? When you have that big science test tomorrow? I thought you’d be studying…getti g some rest…no I’m not mad I’m just. Well a little disappointed I guess. What do you mean this wouldn’t be happening if I’d stop robbing banks their insurance covers it son money isn’t real

Who’s this guy is he your “sidekick”? That’s so cute when are you having him over for dinner. I’m not teasing I think it’s sweet I’m glad you’re making friends. Side note how durable is he I’m about to throw a car at you

i made your favorite dish. i made you something you’ve never tried before. i love you. i spent twenty minutes chopping. my grandmother made this for me when i was little. i made this dairy free for you. i love you. i want to eat together. the onions made me cry. i love you. i learned this recipe for you. i love you. i made this special for your birthday. i love you. i know you don’t like peppers. i love you. i love you. i love you.

12/10 accurate

today @ lunch i was sitting w/ a bunch of my kindergarteners and they started to discuss what each other’s “deepest fears” were. one said “being killed” and the other said “loving people.” i was like y'all…….you didn’t have to be that honest

I’m at a museum right now and I’m really bored so I was taking a selfie and this rly hot guard said “please do not take pictures of the artwork” and I apologized and explained I was only taking a selfie and he goes “I know” and winked

i like the multiverse theory because there are giant hamsters playing basketball somewhere out there. i also dislike the multiverse theory because there’s a world where the competition went to their heads and they forgot to have fun