XAvengers

first encounter (part 1/?)

bucky barnes meets a cat… he’s not quite sure what to do about that

Come here you little punk. 

Steve: *sheepishly* “it’s just a hobby— keeps me out of trouble.”

It's only decade later, after adopting a billion children, that Tim comes out. He is bisexual, and he has two boyfriends, and he is proud of himself and- "Ah, a man after my own heart. Martha and Thomas would be so happy to see how the world has changed."

shocked. astounded. dumbfounded.

Wade: Hey so, I know you got this plan to go back to the past and stay there because the writers are hacks and they can't even keep their own lore intact but LISTEN, how about you hand me those stones and I'll take care of them for ya.

Steve: *staring bewilderedly at the man in Red and Black who just materialized out of thin air* Uh...do I know you?

Wade: Wade Wilson. HUGE fan. I can do this all day. I'm just a kid from Brooklyn. Til the end of the line. Although that last one isn't gonna be real honest if we let the writers ruin a decade of character development, right? *wriggling fingers* Now let me at them sparkly Josh Brolin Space Kidney Stones.

Steve: Look, I really shouldn't be surprised by anything at this point but this is really important and I can't just hand over-

Wade: You know what else is important? Making sure we keep giving Disney the middle finger despite our inability to stop sucking their tits for content because at the end of the day, we're all victims of capitalism. So just give me the fucking stones, Captain Sexy Ass and not ruin my motivation to finish writing the 300k slow burn best friend soul mate AU Stucky fic that I've been working on for two years. Capiche?

Steve: Uhh...

Wade: *picks up the case with the stones and gives finger guns at a confused Bucky* Buckaroo, just a reminder that the serum shortens refractory periods and Wakanda is reallll nice this time of the year for honeymoon destinations. *Large Obvious Wink*

Bucky: Uhh...

Wade: *random beeping from his toolbelt* Oh gotta go! Have fun! *disappears*

Sam: *giving Steve and Bucky the Stink Eye* How short is your refractory period?

Steve and Bucky: *redfaced*

i'm over 2 weeks late but happy 20th anniversary to the Most Important comic book cover of all time. here is my homage