xa1.den_

Dex lies half across Matt's bed, silk sheets half draped around his legs, one arm loosely wrapped around the lawyer's waist. He's exhausted in that heavy, bone deep way, the kind of tired that makes his eyes burn even when they're closed.

He's wearing one of matt's worn out T-shirts he's refused to give back. the thought that He shouldn't be this comfortable–shouldn't be allowed to have this—flickers and fades out of his mind quickly as he's distracted by the feel of the lawyer's hand on his back.

the fabric bunching slightly as Matt's rough palm slides along his back, making goosebumps rise against his skin. murdock's callused fingers hesitantly run over the center of dex’s spine, as if he were approaching a cat he's afraid of scaring off–where the big ugly scar runs long and deep he traces the line much too gently too carefully.

Dex exhales, almost a sigh as he speaks.

"Don't..stop"

it comes out needier than he meant for it to.

Matt swallows, nodding faintly, following the scar all the way down before up again, repeating the action a few times. poindexter's breathing evens out, sinking further (not like that u freak..) into Matt, tension bleeding out of him little by little.

barely awake, his fingers find their way to matt's other hand, fingers curling loosely around the blind man's wrist guiding it forward and lazily tilting his head he presses a tender kiss against his knuckles and then he lets matt's hand go after a second, nearly asleep when the soothing hand leaves his back.

Dex let's out a low groan lifting his head from the mans chest to look up at him making matt chuckle. Though he can't see him, he already knows dex is pouting.

"Sweetheart, Hey," Matt murmurs softly, bringing his hand up to brush along his jaw first, giving dex enough time to pull away if he wanted to. He doesn't. So Matt continues. His thumb traces the line of dex’s hard cheekbone, his brow, his perfectly kissable lips, mapping out all his features, making dex blush.

"What are you doing, counselor?" dex slurs sleepily, making the lawyer feel fuzzy all over.

"Looking at you"

Dex huffs under his breath, catching matts wrist a second time, but he doesn’t stop him. matts thumb now brushing lightly against the scar on his cheek. It's too much and not enough at the same time.

After "looking" at dex for a while, His fingers slide back to his jaw again, settling there before tilting poindexter's face just slightly upward, leaning in slowly to softly press his lips against his and dex whimpers into the too soft kiss–much too slow and gentle for Dex’s liking, his hand slips from Matt's wrist to his shirt, hand fisting in the fabric to hold onto the man as he parts his lips for him to slide his tongue against his, not even bothering to fight for dominance letting matt be in control without a fight for once.

he kisses him like he's drowning, and Matt is the only way up from the deep water he's drowning in, his air, his everything. matt melts into it, a quiet groan vibrating through his chest. His teeth nip gently at dex’s bottom lip, kissing him dizzy.

The angle is awkward–terrible really, dex is halfway on top of matt, chest pressed against his, legs tangled awkwardly across the mattress. dex is craning his neck to kiss him properly while matt cranes his down awkwardly to not break the kiss. It's uncomfortable, but dex doesn't care. He'd kiss Matt uncomfortably for hours if it meant he could have this. Dex shifts his weight, accidentally elbowing murdock, making the blind man wince and break the kiss—a string of spit connects their lips before it snaps, making dex's already flushed cheeks flush even more so.

"You're beautiful." Matt says breathlessly, which catches dex off guard. He lets out a disbelieving huff in return, shaking his head.

"Don't."

Matt's thumb slows against his cheek, eyebrows drawing tight together, worry flashing across his face. "Dex.."

"Don't talk to me like that." He says, "Like I'm–" he stops, jaw tensing as he spits the words out "like I'm someone deserving of love. Like I'm not disgusting"

Matt sighs, speaking softly, "I don't believe God looks at someone and decides they're too far gone to be loved. That's not how it works, dex" his fingers move up, threading gently into short blonde hair, massaging the scalp in a calming way.

"You deserve to be loved, even if you don't believe it" dex is silent, but listening. Maybe matt is right. Maybe he's wrong, dex let's out a small laugh, wondering how the hell matthew—or anyone could love someone like him.

"And everyone says I'm the insane one"