the big dipper

First I have a problem with getting some sleep, and now I find it extremely hard to get out of bed. There’s something wrong with me, I feel it. Seriously.

Maybe you have insomnia? 'Cause that seems like it could explain why you're acting this way.

What, you're leaving?

Need to unwind. Anyone wanna join me for a beer?

Dude, are you even old enough to drink beer?

HHA, I guess you weren’t so much helpful. Were you ?

Guess not. In my defense, though, I was going up against a guy twice my size, so I'm technically pretty brave for still attempting to fight him off.

Oh, I’m so sorry, sweetie. I told you I was kidding. Okay, I take it back, Taco Bell boy. So, um, km pretty socially awkward other people usually initiate the conversation.

It’s alright, I totally knew you were joking about it. I’m actually kinda socially awkward too, especially around girls, so don’t be surprised if I just stop talking any minute now and sorta stare off into space.

Dipper, WHAT happened?!?

Y'see, there's a perfectly good explanation for this and it's not as bad as you think.

What was the reason for the fight anyway?

The guy was pushing one of my friends around so I stepped in to tell him to back off, but then he threw a punch so I threw a punch and it just went downhill from there.

Only if you’re sure. I just- I hate seeing people in pain. I mean, getting beat up and failing Algebra 2 twice. Just adds to the embarrassment… kidding.

Yeah, make fun of the guy that just got beat up. That’s totally not rubbing salt in the wound or anything. Lucky for you, I’ve got pretty thick skin.

Oh, your face looks like … Oh! Is the other guy dead then?

Real funny, man. Trust me, he's pretty banged up too.

Are you sure? You look bad, like, really bad. Um, do you need help cleaning up?

No, no, don’t worry, I’m fine. I can handle it; a couple cuts and bruises aren’t that hard to clean up. Thanks for the offer, though.

Di-Dipper?

Dinah, I swear it's not as bad as it looks. It wasn't my fault, either. 

The only people that say that, are the people who got their asses completely handed to them. I can see why you said that.

In my defense, I got a couple good punches in before the other guy got his friends involved. Then it kinda went downhill after that.

At least people back in Gravity Falls didn't get up to stuff like this. It was a lot more tolerable; California people are just plain crazy.