cissy

Official ominous postcard

Movie about a depressed and rather morbid autistic man planning to commit suicide and picking up a number of odd jobs in an effort to raise enough money to meticulously plan and prepay for his funeral so his mother doesn’t have to worry about it after he is gone. He begins to connect with people and enjoy life for the first time while working part time as a greeter in the funeral home, helping an eccentric old lady organize her basement, walking 7 dogs and maintaining a feral cat colony for a guy with a broken foot, playing a number of bit parts in local ads and stocking the shelves at the convenience store at night. In the end, he has befriended many of his neighbors and he decides he does not want to die and goes back to school to become a funeral director instead.

He is popular at his funeral home gig because he keeps accidentally saying things that are very reassuring and death positive. Because he wants to die. He eventually donates his funeral fund to the old lady’s granddaughter after her sudden death so she does not have to sell her grandmother’s prized possessions to pay for her funeral.

The old lady gifts him one of her ceramic cats at the beginning of the film which he reluctantly accepts out of politeness. Near the end of the film, he adopts a friendly cat from the cat colony that looks remarkably like the ceramic cat and names it after her, signaling his commitment to surviving and caring for his cat the way the old woman lived for her ceramic collection.

“I don’t like this song because I can’t relate to it” skill issue. I’m mad at my husband I love my girlfriend I’m a lone cowboy I’m growing old I’m growing up I’m depressed I love my friends I’m perpetually horny I’m drunk at the club I love my husband again

You have the best wizard-dad ever. He lets you have the tallest tower with the best view of his territory, gives you all these big dragons as pets, and keeps you safe from the outside world. So why are these strangers trying to take you away and calling him “evil”?

me when all i’ve done is mess around

sorry for the mixed signals I don’t know what I want or what I’m doing mostly

i am always one wrong word away from being shot by all the people who find me tolerable

50’s beronica is sooo good but i highkey would’ve given my left kidney to have seen them together in the modern tl like imagine betty and veronica having crazy lesbian sex while veronica helps betty catch serial killers and betty helps veronica reenact goodfellas or whatever niche 70’s-90’s crime film was actually being referenced at veronica’s speakeasy

if you can't handle me at my worst then stop dragging me there fucker

tumblr users being generally knowledgeable about phishing attempts and scams and yet not hesitating to click various links from unknown users because they say such things as "spin the wheel to determine your alvin and the chipmunks band persona based on my favorite italian desserts" and we go "heck yeah."

biggest suspension of disbelief in TV and movies is when the narrative tells you that a character is plain/ugly/unattractive but theyre all cast with hollywood actors in perfect hollywood makeup so the actual gap between them and the 'hot' characters is a spot the difference game.

Working an office job will truly make you have the wildest enemies, bc why is my nemesis rn a woman I’ve never met and who exclusively haunts me by sending diabolical emails, and also a specific guy who left my company before I even worked here and made the system so fuckass that it ruined procedures for like a year

working in academia is not better, if this can help. my personal enemy is a person, living on the other side of the world, who wrote a paper without being specific enough on their procedures. fucking bastard.

there should be a term for characters you personally don't care about but you defend them anyways because the way people treat them is really uncomfortable. like ok this is a very middle-of-the-road character for me but the fandom's either been super misogynistic, racist, etc. about them or harassed innocent people who try to genuinely explore that character warts and all, and i find that more annoying than the actual character.

the term should by 'my client', like you're a lawyer defending your client that you are completely indifferent to but you are obligated by your job (or your morals) to defend