lady bird.

girl help they're making a porn parody of the purge but without the porn

i have a love/hate relationship with when someone reviews a book that is earth shattering in its scope and so aware of its position in the systems of our society and their disassembly and it's like 'the prose was really good :) the characters were so interesting <3' like YES but what about the implications!! mate you're forgetting the ideological consequences!!!

Like two years ago I ran into a salamander biologist in the woods who complimented my ability to 'walk quietly in the forest while causing minimal disturbance to the leaf litter.' Still goes to my head.

I had to get my kidneys imaged a few years ago and the urologist somewhat breathlessly told me "you have absolutely beautiful kidneys." and tbh I've never felt hotter.

Im always like "i will not add my two cents. i will not add my two cents" but i cant lie the pennies are getting sweaty in my hand

once you start typing in all lowercase you unfortunately kind of have to keep doing it forever or if you start capitalizing things people will think you’re either mad at them or having some kind of episode

Being a flop changed my life. The world is not my oyster, I am glowing. I walked into a pole this morning. There's very little I wouldn't do for $1,000