✎﹏Gibby

pt. 1

L. Lawliet:

- Would canonically be the best ‘larp’ that there ever was. Truly the type of guy to hear about a show in passing and be able to easily convince people he’s been an OG fan since the pilot episode came out. People like Misa would be the perfect victims for his larp antics. An example of how this would play out is him convincing Misa that he’s been a fan of her since her first magazine cover. All the while Light tries to explain the lacking logic behind his lies, Misa just nods along with an excited ‘No way, Ryuzaki! I had no idea you were so into my modeling!” He wouldn’t even be the kind of person to larp for external validation, he would literally just do it out of boredom.

- L was like the ugliest kid ever. I’m not expanding on this. (I love him lmao).

- Growing up L had a plethora of mental tests run on him whether it be a simple IQ test or one of the more complicated methods of measuring intellect, and yet not a single psychological evaluation. He’d be evaluated by developmental pediatricians, occupational therapists, or child psychiatrists for days at a time and the results would be more or less the same each time. At the bottom of his patient chart would read something like ‘developmental markers of intelligence are exceptional. Side note-> PSYCH EVAL STRONGLY ADVISED’. He’d be sitting opposite of the doctor watching over him stacking blocks or whatever they make gifted kids do, all the while sitting in the most ridiculous manner with like twenty laffy taffy’s in his mouth because he read during one of his nightly doses of published research papers that sugar helped with cognitive skills.

- Threw a half assed tantrum when he was alone in his room one day to see what it felt like to be overwhelmed by emotion when he was like 5 years old. Didn’t really get it and well into adulthood was lost when it came to people making emotional gestures. This is what makes it so easy for him to do things like imprison and torture Misa in an effort to solve the Kira case. Her cries are genuinely going through one ear and out the other.

- Will literally clap when the plane lands and be the only one to clap. Slow, mechanical clapping.

- Is 100% lying when he says sitting that way helps his mental processing. He just likes sitting like that. And then he went and passed the bad habit down to Near like it was a recessive trait.

part 2

Disclaimer: I am not, nor do I claim to be, a mental health professional and so all mentions of mental health are based off of knowledge built on personally done research.

Light:

-When Light was experiencing his formative years, especially during early elementary, he was abnormally well tempered. He would have a feeling akin to being left out whenever he’d see other children throw tantrums frequently because he didn’t get easily overwhelmed by his feelings. This experience internalized into his sense of superiority since as someone with narcissistic tendencies, it wasn’t because he was abnormal but because he simply had natural emotional regulation that other children did not. This was exemplified when Sayu was growing up since she was a more emotional child than most. Even though they shared the same parents and were raised identically, she didn’t have that same emotional ‘intelligence’ than he did, and so in his mind his superiority was unique to himself and not due to any outside factors. He’s also put on a pedestal by other adults because of this emotional regulation, something that is developmentally debilitating as it encourages him to mask rather than be emotionally open, a trait that carries over even into adulthood.

- Light has the ability to make guy friends and lose them just as easily just by existing. The way girls flock to him, his talents, and athleticism naturally calls the attention of many people, including other guys. His easy going personality and polite mask makes it easy for people to project their own feelings onto him like a blank canvas, and so just as quickly as their spark of interest comes it fades as their jealousy grows because of the same things that drew them to him and they project that onto him, finding little reasons to paint him as a bad friend in their mind. It also doesn’t help that Light is more of a homebody and focused on school. He’s had to deal with so many guys calling him stuck up for pulling away/not putting in effort when he wasn’t the one to even pursue the friendship in the first place. When it comes to Light, both men and women behave unreasonably.

-The Light Yagami that is shown during the memory loss/handcuff arc does not exhibit the same behavior as the Light Yagami we interact with in the beginning of the manga/anime. In simple terms, Light Yagami is introduced as a detached and chronically bored genius going through the motions of life all the while forced to witness the rot of society, while the Light Yagami that forfeit ownership of the DeathNote is an arguably more societally aligned, functional human being. The reason being that Light has finally found intellectual challenge in the form of L. Think of it like this: if Light thought and felt the same way he did in the beginning of the series, he would recognize that he is capable of being Kira or atleast to some extent find logic in Kira’s ideology, despite his less than savory methodology even without any recollection of being Kira. However, memory loss Light doesn’t think that way any longer, because he simply isn’t feeling that level of boredom he did surrounded by the less than intellectually invigorating. I believe if Light had found his equal in the form of L sooner, he wouldn’t have become the serial killer ‘God of the New World’ we all know and love because he never really was in it because he truly believed in his ‘Godhood’ but because he was simply a bored individual who saw his peers and those surrounding him as lesser beings in need of justice in the form of his judgement (in the simplest terms).

-IF Light were to have any psychological disorder (heavy emphasis on IF considering the fact that he’s not written to be accurate representation of any particular disorder and so it would be disingenuous to claim otherwise especially considering his harmful actions) I think he would fall better under Schizoid Personality Disorder. I know a lot of people default to Narcissistic Personality Disorder or ASPD, but I think the way he interacts with people (pre-death note) is more indicative of him masking detachment rather than outwardly being manipulative. To put it plainly, Light Yagami pursued very little social interaction in his day to day. School, Cram school, family dinner, and then studying. Rinse and repeat. And even then he exudes this exhausted energy, from pretending not to ‘see the rot of the world’ in his worlds and continuing through the motions of life despite his emotional exhaustion due to this burden. This is very similar to experiences people with Schizoid Personality Disorder may have as they don’t form meaningful personal relationships (Lights greater emotional detachment when it comes to his peers) and excessively daydream (something Light is known to do). In addition to that, some people with that disorder report this emotional detachment stems from observing the horrible circumstances they see throughout other human experiences and default to emotional numbness as a defense mechanism, and it’s clear that Light mulls over these existential thoughts of human suffering which becomes a key motivator to him using the Death Note in the first place. It’s clear that visually Light isn’t a completely expressionless individual, but other than the polite and cordial smiles he flashes others, he isn’t exactly the most expressive person. Many people with the disorder don’t exactly fit the mold of ‘eccentric or overly robotic’, similar to Light they adopt a highly functional mask they use to interact with the world outside their thoughts. In addition to that, people with that personality disorder report finding comfort in more solitary hobbies or in intellectual pursuits and I suppose the Death Note functioned as both for Light in a way. Even though Light plays his role as the perfect student and son expertly, at the end of the day it’s still a role. Side note- I also agree he exhibits behaviors that align with other personality disorders as well, I just think this best fits Pre-death note Light.

Tw: Misogyny, brief mention of SA.

Light Yagami was a slightly misogynistic character; however, that is a flaw in the writer's portrayal of him. A lot of people bring up Light's first kill (a rapist) to refute the claim of him being a misogynist, but people don't realize that a lot of casual misogynists are anti-rapist, as most people tend to be. Think your average boomer, they harbor more traditional ideas of what it means to fit the female gender role; however, many of them are very against rape. So I think rather than being a fundamental part of who Light Yagami is, this view of women being more emotionally motivated creatures is a deficit of the writer and not himself, as Yagami's moral compass is established to be against violence in all forms, including violence perpetuated against women, and so making him misogynistic would make no sense to further his characterization.

However, I do appreciate the implications his more ‘traditional’ view of women has on the story. The Yagami family is nothing if not traditional: an arguably one-dimensional stay-at-home mother, a hard-working and dependable father figure, and two bright-eyed children who (to differing levels of success) pursue their education and contribute to society. Light Yagami is sheltered through and through; there's probably not a single curse word said in that household at any time. SO despite his genius allowing him to see the 'rot of the world', those sheltered beliefs still follow him and influence the way he sees women. His sister Sayu is emotional -> women are emotional. His mother is in less of a dominant role concerning family affairs -> he's more comfortable with seeing women as being in association with a man rather than being the frontrunner. I think rather than pure maliciousness, his view of women can be interpreted as a result of his schema of what a woman is, due to what he's seen. So while, as a narcissist, he looks down on everybody, he has a uniquely more traditional explanation for why women specifically are easily swayed by his manipulation. It would be an interesting form of characterization if expanded on because it would greatly highlight his already established savior complex. Obviously, as he gets older, it becomes more ignorant if anything, but honestly, he is already written to be a hypocrite, even if that aspect of his hypocrisy is more coincidental because of Ohba's beliefs.

(Also, I'm not saying all traditional homes are mysoginistic cess pools nor am I trying to insinuate that Sayu and her mother are shallow characters. I just think the way they’re portrayed shows how Light perceives them to be one-dimensional and that that perception aligns with his thoughts on women.)

I feel like in an AU where Light won (and Takada lived), she would've gone on to be the equivalent of a mega-church pastor for the Kira cause.

An example of this playing out ->