PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Maybe yes.
-Sirius
But are you, or are you not, doubting this now?
Not today Justin
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@woeful-wormtail
PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Maybe yes.
-Sirius
But are you, or are you not, doubting this now?

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24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.
Only one kind? Oh my god, what kind of hell is this? Jeez, if every sandwich ingredient is available, just throw everything on there. Every sandwich ingredient on the one sandwich. Thatâs what Iâll have.
The Rat Who Caught A Cat ~ Peter & Lily ~ May 20th, Love, Marriage & Forever
If she were to be perfectly honest, Lily would have to admit that both James and her had forgotten to get a job for Peter. When they set out planning this wedding, they had never intended for it to grow into a fanciful affair including such a great number of people. There had been Sirius and Mary as a given, but the rest had just⌠happened. It had felt right to offer this or that duty to a friend as it occurred to them they needed someone for the task, and there had never been a duty which screamed Peter. He had simply gotten overlooked, awful as it was.
Their mistake hadnât occurred to them until yesterday afternoon, when it was far too late to rearrange jobs, and it had bothered Lily ever since.
Then today there had been Rocky with her in her changing room, while Mary wrestled her into the special necklace which the wedding rings could be hooked to, and it had suddenly occurred to herâŚ
âThere is no way Rocky will walk down the aisle of her own free will!â Lily exclaimed, wide-eyed with something very akin to full-blown panic. Not panic that she was making a mistake marrying the man of her life, or fear of the people who would be watching her, they were all dear and trusted friends, but a far more existential fear. âI canât Imperio my cat!â she gasped, looking as scandalized as if she hadnât just suggested it herself.
She turned steely green eyes on Peter, who didnât look like the most fearsome cat tamer hiding on his safe perch on the stairs. For a moment doubt wriggled at the back of her mind. She shoved it aside. No. Her idea was perfect. Being the ring bearerâs bearer would not just include Peter, but he would have a job just as important as that of Sirius and Remus, and most importantly of all, nobody could do it as well as Peter could. After all, who would be more suited to this job than an Animagus?
âPlease, Peter?â she asked, face scrunching up. âPlease we need you to do this for us! Rocky is no trouble whatsoever, sheâs a sweetheart, you just have to carry her down the aisle when sheâs carrying the rings on her necklace! It would look so cute and we told everybody she would be carrying the rings but sheâs so wilful, I donât think she can be lured with treats!â She let a moment pass before she went for the killer argument, adding, âand our wedding just wouldnât be complete if you werenât a part of it!â
Peter stared at her for a long moment, his brain attempting to form words and his mouth opening and closing several times. Wasnât this what he had wanted? To be a part of this wedding? Sure, he would have been happier in another role, one that didnât scare the crap out of him- maybe he himself could hold the rings? Why did they even need the cat? No. He should say no. He wanted to be important, but he didnât want to embarrass himself by not being able to carry a stupid furry kitten.
But then she said those words. â-our wedding just wouldnât be complete if you werenât a part of it!â
His heart warmed and his shoulders relaxed, his eyes locking on to Lily instead of constantly shifting to the immobilised kitten. âYou really mean that?â There was a sound of disbelief colouring his tone, but even so, his lips curled into a small smile. They wanted him here. They wanted him to do something. So what if he had to carry their cat? The cat was carrying the rings and the rings were an important part to a wedding. Maybe even the most important part! How could he have even considered saying no?
Peter nodded before the words even left his lips. âOkay. Yeah. Yeah, Iâll do it. Iâll carry the cat.â He was going to say he would carry âherâ, but honestly, Peter had already forgotten if the little blighter was male or female. Itâs name was Rocky. It wasnât very gender defining. He hated that about animals. You just couldnât tell, but god, the owners were just so offended when you thought their precious cupcake was something other than what they were.
âAny chance you could keep it frozen like that though?â he released a small laugh, taking another look at the kitten. âI mean, I know youâre against using one of the Unforgivable Curses on the thing, but clearly youâre not above using this one.â He raised his eyebrows, waiting for a response. âYes? No? Is that a thing we can do?â
PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Youâre mad.
-Sirius
Maybe... Maybe not.
45. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
Um⌠Iâd probably ask if I was happy. I hope Iâm happy in the future. That would be ideal.

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60 Questions You Aren't Used To
1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?
2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?
3. The person you would never want to meet?
4. What is your favourite word?
5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?
6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?
7. What shirt are you wearing?
8. What do you label yourself as?
9. Bright room or dark room?
10. What were you doing at midnight last night?
11. Favourite age youâve been so far?
12. Who told you they loved you last?
13. Your worst enemy?
14. What picture/s do you have on your desk?
15. Do you like someone?
16. The last song you listened to?
17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?
18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?
19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?
20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)
21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?
22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?
23. What is one unique thing youâre afraid of?
24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.
25. You just found 100 galleons! How are you going to spend them?
26. You can apparate to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?
27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. âBe brand-specificâ it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you donât drink booze thereâs something you can figure out⌠so whatâs it gonna be?
28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place?Â
29. What is your favourite expletive?
30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Donât worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So whatâs the one thing youâre going to save from that blazing inferno?
31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
32. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didnât think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?
33. What was your last dream about?
34. Are you a goodâŚ.[insert anything youâd like here]?
35. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?
36. Have you ever built a snowman?
37. What is the colour of your socks?
38. What type of music do you like?
39. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?
40. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?
41. What quidditch team do you support?Â
42. Do you have any scars?
43. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
44. Are you reliable?
45. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?
46. Do you hold grudges?
47. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?
48. What is the most unusual conversation youâve ever had?
49. Are you a good liar?
50. How long could you go without talking?
51. What has been you worst haircut/style?
52. Have you ever baked your own cake?
53. Can you do any accents other than your own?
54. What do you like on your toast?
55. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?
56. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.
57. Do you often read your horoscope?
58. What is your favourite letter of the alphabet?
59. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?
60. What do you think about babies?
PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Reckon Potter isnât trying to get with me, Peter. Heâs married now, remember?
-Sirius
Remus then.
This Kitten Will Be The Death of Me || Peter & Sirius || 20th May, 1979
âNo. Stop moving. Stop- Ow! Are you serious!?â
Peter hadnât even walked into the room yet and already the kitten he had been handed was taking it upon itself to scratch the living hell out of his arm. Lily had insisted that she was lovely, but god, she clearly hated him. Was it even a âsheâ? Peter couldnât remember what Lily had called it. Did it even have a name? With a memory like his it really was quite amazing that he had passed any of his classing during his years at Hogwarts.
The music was playing, someone seemed to be indicating that he should be going, but no, he couldnât! He still hadnât figured out how to get this thing to stop struggling so much! It was like it could sense what he was! Oh, god, it was probably just going to swoop round and claw at his jugular any second now.
âWhy is this my life?â he muttered the words to himself before proceeding through the door. Oh hell, they were all looking at him. James and Sirius were already at the front, but now here he was with an actual monster and all these guests were looking at him. Or at least, they were looking at the cat. Either way, he wasnât used to this much attention and suddenly he was not only afraid of the cat, but what if he fucked up!? What if the cat got free? What if he stumbled over his own feet? What if-
He couldnât finish the thought as he was getting pushed from behind in an attempt to force him down the aisle. Peter didnât even look to see who had pushed him, but he was just thankful that he was moving at all. Did his shoes have laces? Were they tied? Would this kittenâs claws ever leave his wrist? Who even knew?
Itâs Not Funny || Peter & Mundungus || 20th May, 1979
It was ridiculous. It was so ridiculous. A ring bearing kitten. And he had to carry it down the aisle. Why did the kitten have to be a thing? Why did he have to walked down the aisle with a scrambling bundle of fur that would probably try to kill him in his animagus form? It wasnât fair. Sure, he was grateful. He had wanted to be part of his best friendâs wedding and clearly they struggled to find a place for him, but god, carrier of the ring bearing kitty? Was he not more important to them than that? Women can have as many bridesmaids as they want, why canât grooms have more than one best man? It wasnât fair.
People had been laughing when he had brought that thing into the room. There were some âawâs and a few unnecessary squeals from some females in the crowd, but Peter knew he had heard laughing. He knew that he had looked ridiculous and, frankly, if it had been anyone elseâs wedding he may very well have dropped the bloody animal and left, but no... This was James and Lily. He loved them. Even if that meant holding Satan in his arms, he wouldnât ruin their wedding just because he was feeling bitter.
But he was though; feeling bitter. Peter sat there alone at the reception watching James spin Lily around the dance floor, Sirius was weaving his way around the room no doubt charming all the guests, and Remus was making his way round the tables of all their school friends. He loved them all, but sometimes, today especially, he just couldnât shake this feeling that they didnât need him anymore. Maybe they never had. His eyes landed back on Lily and James, both smiling like idiots in each others arms and while most people wouls feel happy for them... Peter just felt this overwhelming sense of loneliness. Well, that was until someone dropped into one of the seats at his table.
Locking Up || Peter & Bellatrix || 16th May, 1979
It had been a long day working at the Shamrock CafĂŠ for Peter. Due to his complete lack of preparation, he had forgotten entirely to ask for the 20th of May off and, as just about everyone knew, this was the day of his best friendsâ, James and Lilyâs, wedding. It was too last minute for them to find anyone to cover the shift, so instead he was left with the option of swapping shifts with someone. To his utter dismay, the only person willing to do the swap was the girl who had been working this morning. However, Peter had already been written down as doing the evening shift, so here he was... working the entire day... and he was exhausted.
To make matters worse, he was pretty sure that he had seen Bellatrix Lestrange come in not too long ago, but thankfully someone else had served her. Now, he was all too grateful to be able to lock up the cafĂŠ for the day and head home. Only... when he came out from the back with the keys he was shocked to discover that Bellatrix was still sat there at her table, looking as terrifying as ever and well... the rest of the staff had already left. This was not an ideal situation.
âI-...â He had known the words he had meant to say, but the second he opened his mouth they faded into a strained squeaking noise. How the hell was he supposed to function when he was alone with this woman? âHello. Hi.â He tried again pathetically, struggling to keep the keys from rattling in his shaking hands. âWe, uh... Weâre closed now. We- I have to lock up.â

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PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Never say never, Wormtail. Unless youâre wearing red underwear. Then the answer is never.
-Sirius
P.S. I did. They both deny that they belong to them.
Well, really that just explains everything. Whoâs to say that James or Remus isnât lying to you cause they want to get with you? Youâd never touch them in red knickers, so theyâre denying all claim to them. Seems a legit explanation to me.
Are you potty trained??
Of course I am⌠Iâve been going to the bathroom myself for years.
Donât you dare use all my favorite colloquialisms from church! Iâve got enough sand to build a bank! Howâs the shoe sales going down yonder?
What? I- What?
PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Thank Merlin you and I will never shag, then.
-Sirius
P.S. This hardly solves the case of the unknown underwear.
We would have if my knickers werenât red?
P.S. Have you asked James and Remus?
They Donât Understand || Peter & Atticus || May, 1979
He couldnât believe it. No, he really couldnât believe it. His best friend was married. He was only nineteen and he was married. Of course, when James had announced that he would be marrying Lily, Peter had been happy for him. Why wouldnât he have been? His friend was marrying the girl of his dreams and that was wonderful, but honestly? Peter hadnât expected it to be so soon. They were still so young and he just couldnât understand why they had rushed into such a big commitment. He had never voiced these opinions, James wouldnât have listened even if he had, but god... did they really have to?
The war hadnât really affected Peter much. None of his family had been attacked, he was perfectly safe. He still wasnât even sure that he wanted to be a part of this war. So it was incredibly difficult for him to understand why Lily and James would want to get married so soon. What was the rush? They had all the time in the world, right? It was just hard watching them be so happy, you know? His friends were married and Peter had yet to even kiss a girl. Sure, Fabian kissed him that one time and then he... Peter shook his head in an attempt to clear the memory from his mind. Not that it was a bad memory, but... well, honestly, he would have preferred it to have been a girl. And not just any girl; his girlfriend. Peter wanted someone to love and spoil more than anything in this world, but instead he was left holding a struggling ring-bearing kitten as he watched his friends have what he wanted. Okay, so maybe he was a little jealous, but that still didnât mean they hadnât rushed into it!
Peter stabbed his fork down into a potato on his plate before reaching for his drink. He wasnât even sure what was in it, but the bartender working there in The Three Broomsticks had insisted that it was strong. He had been right on that front, but compared to some of the things Sirius had made him drink, it was actually pretty mild. He emptied the glass and struggled not to cough it back up. Why did people even do this to themselves? Turning his head round to the bar, Peter contemplated getting another, but his eyes shifted to the door as a familiar face walked through it.

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PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
Red underwear on blokes is just awful, Peter. Rid yourself of all of them before itâs too late.
-Sirius
But I like my red underwear...
PETE! PETER! PETERRRR!!!! You didn't happen to leave snitch underwear in my bedroom, did you? -Sirius
I donât think so? Mate, whose underwear do you have?
I do not wear red underwear, Peter! Unless itâs at Hogwarts and Iâm at a Quidditch game. I mean, the colorâs brilliant, but not for underwear!
-Sirius
I really donât see the issue with red underwear. Does this apply to women in red underwear too?