I'm trying, okay! :((

white person: *eats chicken tikka masala once* i just…. i feel so connected… to indian culture …. I’m learning to speak islam…. check out my third eye….. chakra

heard some guy in barnes and noble today say “i can’t stand adult fiction they’re all like ‘i’m getting a divorce’” 

teens gathering at the lake edge acting casual pretending to not be shoplifting water. we can see your buckets

Every John green book: my name is Kirk assgun and I m not cool or popular and I'm bullied everyday because I frick comic books and I watch this really cool show called the Big Bang theory. But it's okay because I at least have 2 other bros and 1 convenient negro friend. You see that girl over there? That's kaydence Tigerlilly Dookieson. SHe is the love of my life. She is misunderstood and like really cool indie bands like Coldplay and she's been smoking since she was 7. She's not like other girls. If only she would realize that the missing key to her life was me, a greasy white boy

prison does things to a person

Accused of drinkos pee pee “I like the taste”

lock. him. up.