I'm a writer and I like to "cook up" prompts, stories, and headcanons! You'll be able to see my current fixation in the blog title, and I'll try to keep that updated as my interests change.
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“I want to write a fic about this but I don’t think anybody will be interested in it” ummm hello excuse me ma’am what do you mean you don’t think anybody will be interested in it??? YOU. YOU ARE INTERESTED IN IT???? write it because YOU are interested in it and YOU want to write about it. fanfic writing should always be first and foremost about YOUR enjoyment, not other people’s.
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I gotta stop dying and getting lost in the underground maze, I got fics to write and drawings to make.
oops?
(gimme a reason to write the fic in my inbox lol)
-💀
I can't do shit for you bestie lmfaoooo I have so many juicy requests dying in my inbox because I can't make myself write anything. I can't even roleplay right now, it's a Herculean effort.
Batman finds a baby, Batman keeps the baby, Batman's baby now.
a/n: I love love love @/witherby's LW AU so I deciced I also wanna write a baby bat reader AU
Reader: baby/toddler reader ❤︎ gender neutral
Contains: surprise adoption (Bruce being himself) ❤︎ Alfred, Bruce, Dick, Cass, Jason, Tim and Damian
How did you get here? Well... Bruce Wayne was a man with a tough exterior and the mushiest heart—specially if there are kids involved; which there were, two years ago, in the mission that changed the course of both your lives forever.
You, a tiny little baby, the child of some new villains who weren't careful enough and got caught. Batman beat them up, got the GCPD to take them away, went back in the hideout to help the investigation... everything he usually did, until he heard a loud cry upstairs, high-pitched and whiny. A baby.
Batman then bolted upstairs, kicked in the door to a nursery, your nursery... and you were fine. The nursery looked carelessly thrown together, as if your parents didn't care as much as they should; it was just the bare minimum.
A sniffle snapped him out of room-analysis mode and made his dad instincts take over. He picked you up very carefully, going through a mental list of things that could be wrong with a baby... but you stopped crying when he cradled you against his chest and made little cooing and shushing noises at your sleepy face.
The kids got a new sibling that day, a baby this time, and damn were they not prepared for you to be this clingy.
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Alfred ˚*̥✦
He was unimpressed when Bruce brought a baby home, scoffed at him but- come on, it's a poor little baby with no one to care for them... and the bat-mobile was already filled with pretty much everything from what used to be your room so... two years later, you were walking, talking, and holding onto his legs while he tried to work around the house.
Asking questions about anything and everything he was doing; and he answered, because why wouldn't he? In his eyes, you're just trying to get his attention, and what's so bad about it? Even if he sighs when you jump around, even if he has to clean crayon off the walls, he thinks you're endearing.
If you want actual cuddles or hugs from grandpa, you'll have to wait until his break. He loves you, but he needs to get things done, and you need to be patient.
"Dear, would you let go of my leg? I need to-" You shook your head, he sighed.
"Alfie, what is that?" You pointed at the same fluffy thing for the third time that week.
"A duster, dear..."
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Bruce ˚*̥✦
The moment your little head plopped on his chest and you fell asleep as quickly as if you had never woken up, his mind drifted to adoption papers. Commissioner Gordon, of course, helped Batman make sure every loose end was tied up before letting him pack your entire room into the bat-mobile.
You had no papers, not even a birth certificate, but you were healthy. And two years later, you were growing up too fast.
Your first word was "bat", your first steps were filmed, and the video is saved on the bat-computer in a folder were deleting files is impossible. He loves you; you are the apple of his eye, his baby bat.
The first time the Justice League met you, and they saw Batman smile and coo and giggle, was a day everyone silently agreed to forget. The kids were freaked out too. Bruce had his affectionate moments for sure, but this was crazy.
And you were just as clingy! If your dad had you in his arms, you expected to be there for a while. If anyone tried to get him to put you down or wanted to hold you too, they were met with a perfectly synchronized noise of dissatisfaction that earned you the nickname Batbaby.
"You wanna help dad with a case, sweetie?"
"I'M BATMAN"
"You are still a baby! I'm Batman."
The case was tiresome. You needed a nap after, but you did it, Batbaby! You found the cookie-thieving dog!
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Dick ˚*̥✦
Was a bit apprehensive about a baby in the house at first, but he came around after a few days of you grabbing his finger and not letting go. Two years since then, and you still hold his hand all day.
He loves you so much! He throws you up in the air and catches you to make you laugh, he shows you acrobatics (you're not allowed to do them yet, Dick says your trapeze bones haven't developed), He gives you piggy-back rides, plays hide and seek with you and tells you that you're the best at it (he lets you win), he lets you nap on his chest and he even lets you play with Haley!
You'll always have a space in his apartment in Blüdhaven, even if you almost never leave Bruce's side, you'll always have Dick to nap on and hold your hand if your dad will be gone for a while.
He has given you the most nicknames out of anyone. At this point, you answer more to his tone than the words he calls you, it's easier for your baby brain to recognize the cooing than to learn every single nickname or petname he uses to get your attention.
"Where's my little star? Where's my darling little sibling..?" His voice, to you, sounds like genuine confusion. Though, everyone else in the manor can see that you're giggling under the table, and Dick just wants to see you smile when you win.
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Cass ˚*̥✦
Baby staring contests become a thing in the manor. She stares, you stare back. Best way to calm you down when cuddles don't work is to have her hold you and stare into your soul... it works, somehow.
She's a quiet person, and you become a very chatty two year old. You yap about everything and nothing, and she listens. She enjoys it; it's her baby sibling time, and she just wants to hang out with you.
You help each other with difficult words; it's nice to have someone who understands not understanding everything yet.
She reminds you of Bruce, so you're also often found trailing behind her like a duckling. She likes to pick you up and press her forehead to yours. It's her way of saying she loves you, and the optical illusion that makes her look like a cyclops makes you laugh too.
But the rare times when you're also feeling quiet, she's the best to watch movies with.
"Cassie, movie?" You rub your eye with one tiny hand and hold the TV remote in the other, arm stretched out to her as an offer.
"Hm." She nods and smiles softly at you, taking the remote and holding your hand to go to the living room.
You fall asleep in her arms watching your favorite movie. "...Baby sibling."
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Jason ˚*̥✦
He didn't know about you until a month after you were adopted. Immediately recoiled when Bruce tried to introduce you to him. Probably the one who took the longest to warm up to you. Not because he didn't like you or babies in general, but because he was scared of hurting you.
He's the one who looks the most like Bruce (other than Cass), and it really confused you. You'd be in dad's arms, and suddenly, dad was on the couch? So you looked at who was holding you, and it was dad! Then you looked at the man on the couch, and... it was also dad? How? You need to investigate this other dad...
With time, he started playing with you, tried to keep the contact minimal so he couldn't accidentally hurt you, but it was hard when you were a little cuddle monster. So he just- laid on his back and let you hug him, keeping you steady with a single hand on your back. Still, he didn't want to actually hold you, so he didn't. But you were relentless.
By the time you were two years old, you could recognize who Jay was. Jay was the one with the wild, black and white hair and scuffed shoes. Dad was the one with the perfectly smooth clothes. At that point, Jason felt more secure about holding you, and you were having the best time with your brother now that he's not scared of hurting you as much as before.
He loves you too much for his anxiety to completely fade though, so he still mainly just cuddles you while sitting down or puts you in a baby carrier strapped to his chest. But your favorite thing is when you're strapped to him and he zips up his jacket over you because he always uses his theater kid skills to make you laugh.
"Ugh! Move it, Dick! Can't you see I'm with child? A real kicker, this one..." Jason sits down in the spot Dick moved from when he saw how much Jason's jacket was laughing at the act.
"Go bring me some ice cream, would you?" Dick wanted to object, but your little cheer could have made anyone crumble.
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Tim ˚*̥✦
Did NOT know what to do with you. Made a binder on your feeding and sleeping schedules, wrote down food you like and food you threw off your plate with a pout, investigated your birth family, everything... However, he was too nervous to hold you for longer than a minute. It wasn't a fear like Jason; Tim just genuinely didn't like babies. He likes you, you're cool, you're his little sibling... but you're still a baby, and he gets uncomfortable with babies.
But now that you're two, he's happy hugging you as much as you like. Mostly when he's working, you just sleep on his lap, and he tucks you in bed when he's done.
However, Tim comes with a big plus for you; Bernard.
Bernard adores you, and Tim loves seeing you get carried around like a doll, win-win!
"Timtim!" He hums, prompting you to continue, "is Bernie coming today?"
𓆩^._.^𓆪
✦*̥˚ Damian ˚*̥✦
Probably the worst reaction of the bunch, being the youngest, he's not used to Bruce's impulsive adoptions. Also, he's the blood son, got it, child?
It took him the longest to warm up to you, but gradually, he decided he liked you. It was a mix of working on his childhood trauma and Bruce swearing you would be forever forbidden from being Robin. (And the look of awe you gave him when he picked you up for the first time, but he'll never admit that.)
Damian is a bit surprised you can't even hold a sword now that you're two; he knew it wasn't really a thing outside of the league to train babies on fighting, but he had assumed a toddler would be able to at least balance their weight when holding a kata—
"Damian! Stop giving weapons to your little sibling!" Damian just scoffed at Bruce's screech but took it away anyway.
"We'll start with something smaller next time." You nodded happily at him.
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I just wanted to let you know that when I first saw your work, I was deep into an AI addiction. As I struggled with pulling myself away from AI websites and chat bots, your work was a really nice thing to lean on. So I just wanted to say thank you for being a brick in my stairs of recovery,,, or something. That sounds cheesy
AWWWWWW THAT'S SO SWEET OF YOU TO SAYYYY THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!
AI can be addicting as hell! C.ai, chat GPT, etc. etc. and I can see how it can be easy to rely on it so much! There's no judgement here! I'm really proud of your progress!!!!!!
people don’t enjoy shipping anymore. the point of shipping isn’t the catharsis of watching them kiss onscreen, it’s grabbing the characters and mashing their faces together like you’re five years old playing Barbie in your room again. it’s to take one moment of eye contact in canon and read that over and over and over again with twenty different writers’ interpretations of the characters internal monologues if they were in love. it’s to see the characters interact and cheer because you know that’s another moment to add to your list of canon compliant fic ideas. you’re stressing yourself out, this is supposed to be fun!
You will $500 if you can write a single-spaced 12pt font Times New Roman front/back two page essay on anything you want— WITHOUT looking anything up.— what do you pick?
My god. What couldn't I do this for?
She-RA
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Shadow the Hedgehog
Severus Snape
Bruce Wayne
Portal and/or Portal 2
DnD
The process of self-serve troubleshooting your Internet before needing to call your ISP
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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