sorry i’m late. i was listening to the wind in the trees.

cant wait to go home so i can go be horizontal. all this vertical stuff sucks

everytime i want something i should be shot in the head

I will serve cunt again just give me a Minute

the human body is an engineering marvel. I sneeze in bright light. if I dont get enough sunlight on my skin I get tired and sad and have to drink a lot of milk to fix it. standing too much hurts, but sitting too much also hurts. if I get a virus, my body will increase its temperature in an attempt to cook it, which also cooks my brain cells. toenails exist. I have to turn the radio down to see better when I drive. there are 17 genes dictating what my hair texture is, but it completely changes when the air is too humid. yawning is contagious. there are more species of bacteria living in my body than there are species of birds in the entire world. every few months I grievously injure my neck by "sleeping on it weird." it took seven million years of human evolution to form me, and now I'm afraid of phone calls.

[very clearly indulging the urge] im fighting the urge

your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for a graduate degree

a one season television show is also a dead wife if you think about it

Don't worry, mutual with a zero-note post. I've added your post to my queue. So, in 6-8 business weeks, we're going to do big numbers! Such as, 1.

People on Tumblr love sharing information about themselves no matter how asinine it is. And I'm the same way. Everybody tell me what the last thing you drank was.

my first words were wikipedia.com