Oya?

"So where do we go from here?"

The black-haired male sat directly in front of you at the edge of your bed, but his head was bowed, causing his bangs to hover over his eyes. When he arrived at your home twenty minutes prior, it was unexpected. His presence had puzzled you, and prompted a war between two contrasting emotions.

Would today mark the end or the start of a new beginning? Just what would the date remind you of moving forward? Happiness? Or complete and utter heartbreak?

"I'm not sure what you want me to say. You're the one who came over unannounced."

The confession was exhaled softly to convey your lack of hostility. Though, Suna only falls silent for a moment rather than bestow upon you an answer.

"Do you have something you want to say to me?" Whenever you were with the volleyball player, his presence would overwhelm you with a sense of familiarity. It would melt the icy substance piercing your heart and bring you to a state of unadulterated sincerity. But sincerity was something Suna struggled with during the entire duration of your relationship. So, even as your walls tumbled down, his remained as sturdy as ever.

"Honestly... Not really." A hand was sent to run through his hair roughly. It is at this point that you can see his red-rimmed eyes. The bottom of his eyelids were puffy too, indicating that he too was struggling with the direction your relationship had gone. "I just didn't want to leave things like that."

"You mean a half-break up through text?" Empty laughter pushes past your swollen lips. Over the years, you had developed a nasty habit of chewing on your lips whenever you were anxious. To be honest, you never knew it was a symptom of anxiety until it was pointed out to you by your younger sister. "Yeah, I guess that makes sense."

The sound exiting your mouth causes anguish to wash over Suna's features. How could you laugh in a moment like this? When he knows your heart is shattering.

"Why do you always act like you're okay when you're not?" His undivided attention was now on you, and the weight of his gaze had a rainstorm brewing at your lower lash line.

"What else am I supposed to do?" The words crawl up your throat, leaving cuts along your esophagus. "I've waited and waited for you, Rin. But I'm tired of begging you to love me."

How long had it been since you truly felt loved by the male? Months? Years? When did you stop wearing the ring he gave you with the promise of forever?

Perhaps this was a long time coming. And it was time to stop fooling yourself.

"I tried to love you the way you wanted. God, I tried, y/n. But all I did was hurt you when I tried." Suna could barely keep his own emotions at bay, with tiny droplets escaping and cascading down his cheeks. The urge to reach out to brush away those tears is nauseating, as you know by now this was the end. "I just don't think we value the same things. I can't love you the way you want."

Truthfully, his explanation makes little sense but you had abandoned the desire to understand him months ago. Suna could never adequately communicate his emotions and it was exhausting to try to piece together a story when half the pieces were always missing.

"So, where does that leave us?" The slightest tilt is provided to your head as your own cheeks soon become tainted with burning liquid.

"I don't know. But it seems like you made up your mind." It was a habit of his to thrust the blame onto you.

You were the one who wanted to end things. You were the one who was unhappy. You were the reason happiness was no longer within grasp.

But it was always much more complicated than that.

"You can't say that when you sound like you agree with me. You think we're too different. Right? Don't just pin this on me." Overcome with both despair and anger, your words sound more pointed than you intend them to. And Suna simply accepts it dejectedly.

"...I do. We just value different things."

"What do I value that you don't?"

The counterargument leaves your mouth a millisecond after Suna's admission. Anger shifted to the position of your primary emotion for a moment, which was why you felt compelled to push back at the male.

"I don't know. Okay? I just think I can't give you the love you want." The volleyball player lifted his shoulders into a limp shrug, and it became abundantly clear he had given up.

There was no reason to push and argue. The party that needed to change was no longer motivated to keep the relationship. That was why he showed up at your door - he needed you to know that he was laying down his weapons. But not even a white flag of peace could save your relationship now.

"I just wanted you to put me first, Rin. I wanted you to choose me. And you make it seem like I was asking for too much." A broken smile tugged at the end of your lips as you swiped away roughly at the substance coating your cheeks. Inside of your chest, your heart raced wildly. But there was nothing you could do but accept defeat.

"I hope you find someone who can give you that." Suna sought to convey his wish with the sincerity you craved, yet his words were merely wrapped in regret.

Silence once again claimed the confines of your bedroom, but neither of you attempted to move from your position. Your fingers absently toyed with the stickers on your phone case as Suna peers down at nothing in particular. His answer hung around your throat like a noose, which you try to loosen with your next string of words.

"Just so you know, I don't hate you. I really hope you find someone who is able to love you the way you want."

Suna nods in understanding, before offering his own wishes. As if vocalizing them would make them more likely to occur.

"I want that for you too. I hope he'll love you more than I did."

It's at this point that it dawns on you how much you still did love him. There was a clear line between being in love with someone and having love for them. Over the last two years, you lost much of your attachment to the volleyball player. Yet, you did still love him. And now you would have to fully learn to live without him.

A world without Suna Rintarou - how would that look?

"So, do you want me to take my stuff?" His words sliced through your inner monologue, bringing you back to the present moment. He did not wait for your confirmation, however, and instead raised from the bed while rubbing the back of his neck.

"Yeah. I guess so." Your heavy eyelids travelled from the male to the box of his belongings that were at the center of the bedroom. Soon, everything that linked you to him would be gone, wouldn't it?

"Okay. I think I'll have to come back for some of my other stuff. But I'll take this today." Suna pressed his lips together, surveying the items inside of the box before lifting it up.

"Will you walk me out?"

"Yeah."

The walk from your bedroom to the front door brings about excruciating pain. Your thoughts continue to travel a mile per minute, whereas Suna appears calm and collected.

There would be a time when you would forget his face, wouldn't there? How long would it be before you forgot the sound of his voice? Or how warm you felt when in his embrace?

How long would it be until he forgot about you?

When the two of you arrive at the corridor of your home, you momentarily lose control over your urge to reach out and touch his face. He was facing you without a hint of emotion. He was always quite good at appearing indifferent. But as the pads of your fingers gently caress his cheek for the last time, the male shakes his head slowly. Perhaps it was to indicate the inappropriateness of the action. But that was something you would always wonder, and never have confirmation of.

"Goodbye, y/n."

A thought occurs to you as you stare down at your hands, watching the little droplets spill from above and plant against your floor.

You can certainly learn a lot about a person based on the way they love.

But you could also learn a lot about a person based on the way that they leave.

Because Suna Rintarou did not leave in a merciful manner. He did not murder your heart in one single fatal blow. No, he took his time covering your prior wounds with bandaids to deceive you. He whispered empty words, convincing you that you would heal together, when in fact, you would need to heal from him.

Because how could a person function without a heart?

Well, you would have to find out in the morning.

While your world ended today, it was an unfortunate truth that it would begin again in the morning.

"What does that mean? I do not know what you are insinuating, but I am here for my best friend Oikawa Tooru! That's it." A tiny huff accompanied your declaration, but the younger boy only snickered in response.

"Left side or right side?" The inquiry was posed out loud, but it was mostly for himself. "Right side, yeah. Closer to our home team." Reo made the decision unilaterally, before proceeding down the stairs towards the front row. This time, he did not bother to glance back at the two individuals he had entered with. They would find him again at some point. Evidently, his priorities were different than yours.

"We'll see who you actually came for soon enough, little miss." A wiggle was delivered to Nagi's eyebrows as he slipped past you before jogging to catch up to Reo.

You were about to proclaim your innocence again to the disinterested boy when a gentle hand tapped your shoulder. The sudden contact prompted you to straighten your spine on instinct. Interactions with unknown parties would activate performer y/n - it was a habit you were striving to break.

But the second you shifted your body to acknowledge your captor, a strange sense of relief flooded your body and silenced the sirens ringing in your head.

It was the first time you had experienced such a reaction to someone who wasn't your brother, Nagi or Oikawa.

Strange.

"Looks like the ice princess made it." The black-haired male displayed a flashy grin while resting his hands against his hips. "You're even dressed in our school colours. Who knew you had so much school spirit."

"If you're trying to hurt my feelings, I'd suggest you try harder." It was clear he was teasing you without any malicious intentions, and yet you could not bite back a snarky retort. "I guess you might feel threatened, as these colours suit me much better."

A sharp glance was administered from the bottom of his shoes, until the pointed tip of his hair. The judgment was evident in how your eyelids were drooped, but the truth was...

He looked ... attractive. The school tracksuit suited him far too much for your liking. In fact, he could even pass for a damn model. You would know - as you've met hundreds since you were a child. That being said, you would never in your wildest dreams, admit such a thought.

"You know, I think we can both agree on that." Kuroo lowered his voice just a smidge as he took in your figure with an appreciative nod. The gesture communicated defeat with no hostility. As if he was content with you outshining him.

It made your stomach churn with an unrecognizable feeling. Just when did your insides turn into a damn washing machine?!

With a quick shake of your head, you mentally banished the sensations filling your body. Kuroo simply exhaled a chuckle, seemingly knowing your inner conflict.

"Bangs, don't you have a game to warm up for?" Sinking your teeth into your bottom lip, your gaze was cast to the empty volleyball court below. Maintaining eye contact with a sly cat was no longer viable. "We don't need any unnecessary accidents on the court. So I'd suggest you go."

"Oh, are you worried about my safety now?" The outside hitter raised an eyebrow at you, with curiosity shimmering in his eyes. "Don't worry, I still have enough time. Our Captain is the reason I'm out here anyway. He needed to grab something from a friend." When your attention refused to return to him, Kuroo scanned the space for Bokuto while running a hand through his hair.

"Is your captain Bokuto? I share a class with him." For some bizarre reason, you continued your conversation with him. Your mind was whispering - begging - you to return to Reo and Nagi. Yet your heart took control over your vocal cords and feet.

Was it not the slightest bit nice to speak with someone new? Someone you didn't have to pretend with?

"Yeah! Kou mentioned you guys have a project together coming up." A low laugh rumbled in his chest at the thought of you and Bokuto working together. Oh, it would be chaos. "When the two of you eventually lose your shit, please call me. I'm great at mediating."

"Somehow I truly doubt that." Exhaling a soft sigh, your y/e/c irises reluctantly returned to meet Kuroo's adoring gaze. The two of you had only known each other for a limited time, and yet his eyes practically sparkled whenever he was near you. "Well, may-"

"TETSU, MY MAN!"

Suddenly, the person you were both discussing burst into the scene. His voice booming and cutting off the words dancing at the tip of your tongue. Perhaps you would have experienced annoyance in that moment, but the owl-haired male was not alone. In fact, he was accompanied by your favourite mocha-haired setter.

"Where the hell have you been? I got the bag from Akaashi and ran into Oiks. Let's go and get warmed up!" It took Bokuto a few additional seconds to discover that his friend was also not alone. "OH! Was I disturbing something?"

Kuroo was about to answer, his lips parting - when you raised a hand and quickly spoke up.

"No. I was just about to return to my seat. Tooru, can you spare me a moment? Reo and Nagi are also here. We should say hi." A polite smile was draped along your lips and it caught only one person by surprise. The abrupt personality change was expected by one, and unnoticeable to the other.

Kuroo found it odd, yet kept his lips pressed together.

"Yeah, sure. Let's go, y/n." Oikawa mirrored your expression, before extending a hand out in your direction. "My lady, lead the way."

"Good luck on the game today." A respectful bow was administered to your head as you accepted your best friend's hand. A calm exterior masked the inner tornado of emotions that tormented your mind upon your exit.

And what bothered you the most was Kuroo's expression upon seeing your hand in Oikawa's.

"If I'm not your type, why do you only bother me?" The black-haired male surveyed your face for a nonverbal answer to his question. However, as always, he was greeted with a flirtatious bat of your lashes rather than a clue as to what was going on in that head of yours.

"How are you so certain that I only bother you?" Bringing your index finger to your mouth, you lightly bit down on your nail with a grin tugging at the corners of your mouth. Your answer evidently caught the male off guard, as there was a momentary crack in his usual nonchalant demeanour. "How arrogant of you to think you're the only one."

"If you have other toys, go bother them instead. I'm busy." Sakusa shifted his gaze away from you, with tension applying to his jawline. He had to bite back the urge to pout. Where was his mask again? Why did you have to catch him in a moment when he was shieldless?

"Really? You won't miss me, pretty boy?" The hand that was once near your mouth was now extended so that you could guide his attention back to you. To both of your surprise, he did not stop you immediately when your finger applied light force on his chin. Though once his dark eyes landed on yours, he was prompt in swatting your hand away.

"First, don't call me that. Second, why would I miss you?" The volleyball player's words were coated in venom, but he ignored the bitter taste. It was nothing in comparison to the emotion flooding his chest right now.

And the last thing he wanted to admit was that his heart was drowning in jealousy.

"Okay, pretty boy. Just remember... Be careful what you wish for." After dipping an eyelid into a wink, a harmonic laugh follows your words as you step away from the male.

Sakusa instantly regretted his choice of words, and yet all he could do was glare in response.

****

Silence and peace accompanied Sakusa for the following two weeks, along with bright warm spring days. His volleyball team even secured a win against their rival, one that had the hallways of the college buzzing in excitement. But the male could not find himself satisfied with his victory - not when someone was missing from the stands. A certain someone who attended his every game to shamelessly flirt and ward off the fangirls.

It was becoming progressively clearer just how much your absence impacted his daily life. Just how much he did not truly care for quiet days. And just how much he missed your mischievous mannerisms.

Atsumu practically snapped at his team-mate on day 13 - claiming that Sakusa was merely ruining his own chances with the girl he obviously liked. Sakusa cursed out the blonde-haired boy in response, but he secretly agreed with everything that was said.

But what was stopping him from seeking you out? Over the last year, you were the one who pursued him. Should the tables not turn anyway at some point? It was only fair that he chase after you now. Even if that meant going against his better judgment.

Who said emotions were supposed to make sense?

It was day 16 when Sakusa was finally successful in diminishing the distance between you two. Well, rather than being successful in his mission, it was pure luck that caused him to accidentally stumble onto your location. However, luck was truly a nasty creature, as the scene he had entered was one that had a storm brewing inside of the male's chest.

A sickening realization had suddenly plagued the male.

He hated the idea of you "bothering" someone else. Why the hell did he send you into the arms of another!?

"If I had known there were such pretty girls in Japan, I would have come here earlier." The blue and blonde-haired male towered over you with a smirk on his mouth. Based on his accent, he was a foreigner who likely transferred to the school recently.

"I'm flattered that you think I'm pretty enough to move across the globe, Kaiser." A cheerful smile painted across your lips as you interlocked your fingers behind your back. It was more friendly than flirtatious, yet Sakusa felt rage burn in his palms.

When he made the comment about your other toys, he did not think you'd actually give him space. In the past, he had made all sorts of snarky remarks. How many times did he tell you to go away? He had lost count. But what mattered was that you never acted upon his harsh words.

What changed now? Were you fed up with him?

"I'd do a lot more than that for someone as pretty as you, y/n." This time the male named Kaiser lightly grabbed onto your chin, forcing your head to move skyward. And as he leaned in closer, his eyelids dropped just a smidge which even had someone like you blinking in slight astonishment.

But before you could register what was occurring - a new individual entered the stage. Warm fingers were wrapped around your wrist, and with one swift motion, you were pulled away from Kaiser. A familiar scent of laundry detergent tickled your nose. It didn't take you too long to realize whose chest you were currently pressed against.

"Kiyoomi?" His name was breathed out with a fascinated laugh as you peered up at him. Although, his consideration was not on you at all. No, he was engaged in a staring match with the foreign soccer player.

"Y/n. I didn't know you have no standards." The comment comes from Sakusa who refuses to release your wrist. A grimace moulds your features at his incorrect and disrespectful assumption.

"Oh-oh, what do we have here? You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend, y/n." Kaiser raised an eyebrow with a humourless chuckle vibrating in his chest.

"I don't have a boyfriend, that's why." Sakusa tensed up at your retort, which only brought laughter to flow past your lips. "But I do have a grumpy cat it seems." A quick glance was stolen of the male beside you who remained focused on what you realized he considered his love rival.

"But your heart isn't owned by the grumpy cat, now is it?" The soccer player discovered far too much entertainment in the situation. Sakusa was practically sending daggers in his direction, and yet it was all just simply amusing. Kaiser was not interested in you enough to willingly enter a fistfight. But he could not keep himself from teasing the unknown male. "I'm sure I can satisfy your needs much better than he can, my sweet y/n."

"We're done here." It's the latter comment that has the wing spiker suddenly dragging you down the hallway. However, right before leading you away, he released your wrist and instead tangled his fingers with yours. Butterflies sang a melody inside of your stomach as a number of curses were mumbled against the fabric of his mask, causing you to stifle back a titter.

"Why are you so worked up?" The inquiry is posed once Sakusa leads you into an empty classroom. The black-haired male only realized he was holding your hand when his feet stopped carrying him to his destination. A light blush could be seen peeking out from the top of his mask.

It was ridiculously adorable.

"Because he wouldn't stop fucking staring at you like he wanted to eat you." His words were huffed out as his fingers were sent to toy with the strings looped along his ears.

"Eat me? Oh, I'm sure he wanted to do much more." Since ending the physical contact, Sakusa remained a meters distance away from you. A calculated decision on his part, clearly. But you were prompt in destroying that distance with a few steps forward. "I thought you wanted me to play with my other toys, hm?"

The volleyball player elected to remain silent, instead his dark irises bore into yours. Even when you extended your hand to lightly remove his mask, he did not utter a word. Nor did he disturb your movements.

When he brought you here he was not thinking straight, he had no plan. He just wanted to separate you from that man.

"Kiyoomi, if I had known you were such a jealous boy, I would have used this to my advantage earlier." The admission was exhaled with a dramatic sigh, but the playful edge to your tone was difficult to miss. "If you want me, pretty boy, I think now is the time to confess. Unless, you want me to go back to -"

The soccer player's name was swallowed back down as Sakusa's lips suddenly crashed against yours. There was no way in hell he would ever allow you to say another man's name in a romantic context again. The pads of his fingers brushed over your cheeks so lightly you could have confused it for a breeze. The earlier feelings of jealousy melted away with each passing second, as Sakusa bathed in the thrill of finally giving in to his desires. And when you broke the close proximity to catch a breath of air, he was quick to bring your mouth back to his in an urgency you had never expected from the male.