🍷Coco🍷

A few years ago, I made a post about how the cognitive functions manifest in our behaviour and now I’m going to expand on that and give a more detailed, visually accompanied overview for each type, now for the ISFP.

For the purpose of this guide, I took a look at this interview with the Canadian figure skaters Tessa Virtue (an ISFP) and Scott Moir (an ESFJ). You can find the links to other type spotting guides below which I will update over time when new guides are being added.

The dominant and the auxiliary cognitive functions that people use are those that are the ones that are the most noticeable in the quality of their gaze, in their speech style, in their facial expressions, and their whole general demeanour, and so these are the ones that I will be focussing on here. In case of an ISFP, these are Fi and Se. Due to this combination, ISFPs tend to be very grounded in their physical reality and focused on how everything relates to them personally. I always say that there are two base types of ISFPs: the quirky mad-people and the ice queens/kings. Fundamentally, they are not that different from each other, they just radiate a different kind of energy as the former are more upbeat and outgoing (see for example Scottish actress Karen Gillan) than those like Tessa Virtue who belong to the latter, more reserved category.

When I say “ice queen”, I don’t mean that ISFPs are cold-hearted, not at all. It’s just they are the least emotive of all the types. Their strongest function is Fi and so their emotional focus is directed inwards. They are constantly listening to themselves about how this makes them feel and how they relate to that, so there is no need to actively express their feelings outwardly. Interestingly, they are still completely unable to hide their true emotions. It’s like they are oozing out of them unintentionally. The gif above actually shows the difference between an Fi-dom and an Fe-dom very nicely: Scott Moir, as an ESFJ, is staring at her talking with a neutral face, but as soon as she makes eye contact, a reassuring smile appears on his face that immediately fades as soon as she looks away, while her expression does not change at all. That’s the key difference between the two feeling functions: his smile is meant for her and is not a true representation of his feelings, while her smile is genuinely felt. She does constantly look for other people’s reactions, but she does not adapt her behaviour to other people like Scott Moir does. 

What the second gif also shows very nicely is her auxiliary Se. She takes everything in that is happening around her, but she has a singular focus. This is what sets ISFPs apart from INFPs who share the ISFP’s dominant Fi. Due to high Se, the ISFP’s gaze is intense and has a clear direction. In a similar gist, ISFPs are often very well-composed and are a steady presence in the room that don’t get lost inside their own heads as much as INFPs. When they gesticulate, the movement of their hands is precise and has a concrete direction just like their gaze, while high Ne of an INFP would lead to gestures that are all over the place. Not all, but quite a number of ISFPs (along with the other SP types) also develop a taste for clothes that are a bit out of the ordinary. 

When it comes to speech patterns, ISFPs are typically very straightforward in their communication. No infinitely long sentences, no sudden conceptual leaps or aborted sentences, no stutter-like word repetitions, no blatant grammatical errors (intuitive types, by contrast, are typically guilty of at least one or two of these), but ISFPs do often choose their words very carefully and make relatively long and frequent pauses in their speech, that they usually don’t fill with “uhm”, which is rather typical for the types on the Se/Ni axis. To illustrate that, here a little excerpt from the interview regarding the (then) upcoming Olympics:

It’s hard to imagine … failure at this point because if if we’re able to take the ice in Pyeongchang and feel like … we did everything we possibly could … to set ourselves up for that moment … that has … that has to be enough. […] What was most disheartening about that was … we love skating and … we want … other people … to feel the same way … and when any kind of … controversy comes into it … which is natural in a subjective sport … uhm … you know, it it does sort of tarnish it. 

AN

ISFP,

I

CAN'T

FOLLOW

A

SCHEDULE

OR

ROUTINE

FOR

FUCKS

SAKE.

EXTJ: Here’s a solution.

IXFP: I don’t want a solution!

6w5s are more independent than 6w7s, but 6w7s are more adventurous and willing to take chances. A 6w5 doesn't use humor and avoidance to not face up to the darkness in their life, the 6w7 does, which means 6w5s are more negative than 6w7s but also more self-reliant. 6w5s are scared of engaging with the outside world, but 6w7s think, "Why not?" and search for distractions.

Yeah, 9w8 is extremely common in IFP. They aren’t super self-imposing, but they have extremely firm barriers others aren’t allowed to penetrate or cross. They waver between passivity and going along with things and explosions / using force to get things done.

INTJ

Relationships are never the priority of an INTJ, so when they have an interest in someone they're serious about the case. they give sharp and attentive compliments. They have a sensitive soul and will lower their walls for their lover showing that they're actually a little clueless in love which makes it cute. INTJ's being weirdly hot and charsmatic and love to give their partner bold compliments.

ENTJ

Passionate lovers for real. They like to keep their romance steamy and love when someone joins them on an adventure or long deep conversations. they tolerate criticism and is always looking for a way to develop the relationship more. They'l pamper you with self worth compliments and are into a lot of physical touch, giving the most thoughtful gifts.

ENTP

Curious type of people. Dont mind them asking you tons of questions about everything. They're always busy and love to get drunk. They come up with the most random hilarious ideas. Continue the conversation by debating about the most random subjects ever! They're smooth talkers which makes them natural good flirts. Theyre really easy going and open minded. nothing is weird to them... really.

INTP

Extremely complex and imaginative. no conversation will every be boring with them. they have deep emotions and are very capable of warmth and affection. theyre intelligent and love to encourage their partner. great balance between outgoing and staying inside. they're very enthusiastic about things that takes their interest. they dont demand much in a relationship, they just like the presence.

INFJ

They strive for that long term relationship. generally very selfless and always move forward on life. Sensual lovers, and will take every emotion and conversation serious, they'll do everything to make you feel worth full of yourself. Dating an INFJ will feel like you two are the only people in the world. They can put meaning in words and feelings and they'll teach that meaning to you on a deep emotional manner.

ENFJ

Top tier gentle(wo)man. They're perfect family people and love to be around family and friends. They'll cheer u on every journey and look for opportunities to support their partner in their accomplishments. they put harmony above all else. understanding and optimistic at the right times. Very great intuition and will check up on their partner. Also good at romance, they know exactly how to treat their partner with kind love.

INFP

Strong desire for an emotional/soul deep bond with their partner. they'll give you the best gifs you could every imagine. they're so extremely creative and funny in their own way. you wouldnt find someone like them. Genuine romantics and smooth flirts. very lovay people and always wanted their idea of love to come true. they love to get physical with their partner and share all their ideas and dreams with them.

ENFP

They love to explore and they smoothly go with the flow. Trying new things they've never done because is part of their great inutuive and creative mind. Lets not forget that these people are very funny and weird at the same time. They have strong beliefs and opinions are they always know what they're saying making them quiet intellectual people. very lovable and talkative people. besides nobody hates the ENFP .

ISFJ

Givers kind of type in relationships. They like to give love and attention to their lover and dont expect much back. they just need the reassurance from their partner since they're striving for a long term relationship. Very committed people who sense the emotions of their partner making them very nurturing and caring people. probably the most patient and supportive people on this planet.

ESFJ

Always bringing a lot of love and fun in the relationship. They always try to be as optimistic as possible. they have strong emotional reactions making them easy to read. They're very outgoing and love to plan everything ahead. They'll remember every detail about you and would make you feel very valued. they value traditional relationships, so they're the perfect match for marriage.

ISTJ

Values honestly with a passion. They love to plan everything ahead. no detail will be missed. They strive to help their partner to perfection. They're very predictable and are quiet romantic!. They would put a lot of effort in the relationship to work it out. They have a cliche thought of romance and marriage which makes it easy to see what their goal is and what they're longing for.

ESTJ

Bold lovers for sure. They're not afraid to say what they think. They love to keep things real and structured. They are sensitive and protective lovers who believe in hard work. they keep their promises. They love to go outside and be practical in this society. They love to see progress in life making them solid lovers. They are hard-driven people who wont give up easily, they are also big lover of physical touch as a form of affection.

ISFP

They love surprises and are always trying new things they just thought of. Easy going people who are also surprisingly good with children and people. Lovable people who love the idea of a wholesome relationship. They're the type of partner that would be your best friend and lover making them very reliable companions in life. Nothing will be too late for them!

ISTP

complex and practical. They like to be usefull in a relationship making them reliable people. Building their own life with their partner is an absolute goal for them. They value freedom and take pleasure in simple things, they're not needy and also express their love my performing romantic acts. since their actions will speak louder than words. They like to encourage their partner a lot too.

ESTP

Most fun people to be around with. They'll make you feel in the moment and make you feel all your 5 senses. they're good problem solvers and love to take action. they're essential workers who never get bored! They love physical touch and love to shower their partner with surprises and gifts. they would bring you on an adventure and are life- driven people. which makes them a good companion

ESFP

Check the Enneagram page linked to earlier for general 5 / MBTI comparisons. w4 is less outward-focused than w6, so the 5w6 is more able to tap into Fe and make themselves likable / less socially awkward and distant than the w4, which tends to be more fixated on uniqueness and being recognized as special. 5w4s are more morbid, but also less socially-engaged; 5w6s are funnier and more disarming, but both still fear not being ‘enough’ to cope with the outside world, so they withhold self and resources to avoid being dependent on anyone / thing.

*Hides activity*.

*Mutes the group chat*.

*Doesn't participate in any of the conversations, just observes*.

It’s an odd pairing since 5s horde information and do not share it, and Ne-doms want to change the world through sharing their ideas. It would mean the two things working against each other in a way that would be uncomfortable. ENPs do not just want to ponder things and avoid life, they want to change society and force it to adapt to their ideas -- to make a difference and chase after things that catch their attention. 5s stick with things for a long time, and ENPs blow about in life, caught and transported by whatever (temporarily) catches their attention. This is why most ENPs are either 7s or 6w7s -- an unquenchable desire to learn and experience on an intellectual level, but also a deep restlessness and constant craving for new things to ponder and explore.

“When we know who the criminal is, we can understand what set him off.”

Judging Functional Axis: Ti/Fe

Holden’s incredible investigative mind has built a whole new framework of analysis and deduction, and it is through this framework that he passes every criminal through. This allows him to gain a whole new understanding of them. His theories are completely original and ground-breaking because he can identify patterns of behaviour and codify them; it’s unlike anything anyone has tried before. To build this framework, Holden goes back to university, becomes acquainted with the most recent developments, and absorb new concepts and theories like a sponge. As a result, he becomes his method is the right way to do things, dismissing any viewpoint that doesn’t match his own. Naturally, Holden doesn’t work well with other people (he doesn’t understand social cues, regular emotions, or empathize very well), but he can empathize with criminals, deconstruct their mind, and assess it thoroughly, allowing him to manipulate them as he pleases. 

Perceiving Functional Axis: Ne/Si

Holden is never comfortable with the way things are. He wants to change the curriculum in the FBI; he wants to learn from people the FBI has long since disregarded; he wants to put the most heinous criminals to good use. He sees potential where people see nothing and is skilled at developing it and using it for his own purposes. He’s always theorizing out loud, engaging with new ideas, rapidly connecting dots between seemingly unrelated events, making him the best at what they do. Holden is always enthused about the wealth of knowledge these criminals provide. He is skilled at keeping up with them and improvising at every turn to extract the most out of them, especially enjoying it when they’re complex and willing, and simply refusing to follow through when they’re not because they don’t mentally stimulate him.

type one: freshly pressed linens, the sound of high heels on a marble floor, sunny days, a new lemon candle, writing letters to congress

type two: family photos, your best friend’s laugh, flower gardens, apple pie cooling in the window, picnics in the park 

type three: first place ribbons, sunrise yoga, learning a new skill, iced coffee, giving advice to your best friend 

type four: paint splattered overalls, the crackle of old vinyl records, flea markets, a cinnamon latte, watching the rain fall with a cup of tea

type five: soft flannel shirts, the gentle hum of a fan, museums, the pages of an old book, reading the sunday paper in bed 

type six: paperback mystery novels, a kitten purring, the worn-out couch in your best friend’s house, a favorite perfume, calling an old friend 

type seven: ticket stubs, songs that remind you of your childhood, bustling city streets, polaroids taped to the wall, roadtrips in the fall

type eight: black coffee, the steady tick of a grandfather clock, hiking in the mountains, a cabin in the woods after the first snow, a vase of sunflowers

Type 1- The picture perfect cottage vacation they saw in a home and garden magazine that they want to plan and emulate down to the last detail.  

Type 2- A mission trip to help children in Africa.

Type 3- Any vacation that allows them to take their work with them. 

Type 4- Visiting their favorite art museum, or a beautiful natural landscape. 

Type 5- To a foreign country to practice the new language they are learning.  Or, to visit all the historical sights discussed in the book they are reading. 

Type 6- A guided tour.  Or if it’s not guided, visiting the same exact place year after year.

Type 7- Skydiving, ziplining, swimming, hiking, concerts, partying with friends…and doing ALL of it in one trip.  

Type 8- A sporting event, or anything competitive. 

5 and 4 are opposing types, though they share the same withdrawn status; 5 doesn't want anything to do with feelings because that compromises mental integrity so it pushes them away to remain objective and unemotionally impacted by the world and its trials, but 4 wants to amplify every emotion and have it and linger there in it and wait it out and sometimes prolong it, so this creates oppositional energy whenever these two are together. Both are dark and sometimes focused on death (depending on the social variants), unafraid to unapologetic-ly draw attention to negativity, the dark side of life, pain, or suffering.

INFJs are typically lost in their heads and some of them struggle to utilize Fe properly out of a fear that connecting to and caring about others, mirroring their feelings and responding to them empathically, will threaten their inner world and drag them out of it. These INFJs repress Fe development and lean into Ti too much, creating a sort of cognitive loop / feedback loop where they prefer to analyze people and treat them as something to figure out rather than care about their feelings and emotional needs. This can look like 5 without being 5, although the fear of the 5 works well with inferior Se -- 5 is afraid of the outer world and wants to avoid it, to stand on the sidelines and observe, and inferior Se isn't sure how to interact with reality competently and so may avoid it.

That being said, 5 cores are rare for feelers because it would cause severe emotional constipation, which is unnatural for them; but it's more possible for a 5 to be an INFJ than for an IFP to be a 5, because they are ABLE to loop into Ti and completely ignore emotions. It imbalances and stints their development, but they can do it.

ITP, right? This sounds so much like one.

Emotions are universal. Even you have them. They haunt you more than you think. Just because you ignore them doesn’t erase them.

Since you love to understand how things work, and emotions can’t be torn apart and reconstructed in a way that makes sense… I would say consider the good things feelers do for humanity and the positive effect their strong morals and compassion have on the world, since that will resonate with your inferior Fe somewhat.

Consider how ISFJ Rosa Parks changed the future forever with her refusal to give up her seat on a bus. Think about Desmond Doss, the “irrational” ISFP who refused to carry a weapon into combat, but who saved countless lives at Hacksaw Ridge. Consider ENFJ Martin Luther King Jr.’s attempts to obtain equality for African Americans, and unite people of all racial backgrounds in obtaining a “dream” for the future. Read up on how ENFP Anne Frank’s diary has inspired countless people, in the knowledge that even faced with the awful things happening all around her, she never gave up hope. Etc. The strong convictions, irrational idealism, and persistent compassion of various iconic feelers stands as a testament in history. Their actions were not always “rational,” but the world shifted because of them.

Or think about that many of the things you love – movies, songs, books, characters, poems – were created by “irrational” feelers, because they had to be creative or die. Without them, you wouldn’t have artists, designers, filmmakers, or authors who create such rich worlds, unforgettable characters, or express in words what you can’t say, because you don’t know how to dig that deep into your feelings. Isn’t the world richer with Shakespeare, Spielberg, and Dickens in it?

Two of my closest friends are INTP, and what I’ve observedis that:

When they like you in general:

Touch. They touch you. Physical contact is something theyonly display to those they trust. So, if an INTP gets closer to you, startstouching your arm at random moments or pokes you out the blue-they must likeyou. One of my INTP friends will start a tickle fight in a matter of seconds,and the other will take a hold of your hand or arm while speaking to you, sodon’t let stereotypes confuse you. They are very cuddly at heart.

Start conversations. They start conversations with you onlyfor the sake of speaking with you. And they sure enjoy them. For example, INTPfriend will come to me and say something that’s been on their mind for a while,or ask about my day, just to start talking.

Share ideas. I think INTPs are perfectly fine withoutanybody giving feedback to their thoughts, so if they choose to share what theyare thinking and listen to your opinion, they care.

They try to introduce you to things they like. Always. Oneof my INTP friends once said she wouldn’t even know what to talk about with theother person if they didn’t have common interests, so if they show you a seriesthey are obssesed with, a field of science they are interested in, or even asong they can’t stop listening, they are probably trying to have even moreconnections with you, and that’s a good sign.

They share how they feel. Very important. It’s no secret howprivate INTPs are, and how poorly aware of their emotions they can be. So ifthey choose to let you know when they are feeling down, angry or happy, you cansay they trust you a lot. Sometimes they will need help sorting out how theyactually feel, and if they ask you for advice you must mean at least “friend”to them.

Future plans. It can be both sharing their plans orincluding you in them. INTPs welcome only certain people into their plans, freetime and future projections. Simple things like walking home from school everyday at the same time or suggesting to hang out can mean a lot.

When they like you romantically:

Touch. Theycrave it. However, they are shy and don’t initiate contact as often as theywould with a person they consider a friend. 

They createa circle around them and the person they like. It’s like a private club only them are part of. For example, they would talk about things “they” did together, or bring up conversations they had so that other people start seeing them as a pack. 

Laugh. They smile and laugh when you speak, because they listen. Attentively. Both my friends have said they are really happy just listening to the person they like talk, and they always tried to make the person they liked part of the conversation, asking for their opinion or saying their name or something like that.

OVERANALYZE. Their Fe is horrible when it comes to noticing clues and signs the person they like likes them back, so they are always analyzing gestures, smiles and even glances and trying to find a meaning because they feel so lost. In this case they might even ask their friends to interpret the signs for them.

Joking. Perhaps not the kind of humor you are used to, but they sure do try to come off as funny and witty, and will blurt random puns that might even be slightly offensive (Not that they mean to be rude).

Try to talk to you constantly. Similar to what I said before about listening, they also crave conversations in which they can show off their intelligence, wit or randomness. If they find almost any excuse to talk to you, make time to text you, or carve time in their schedule for you, that’s definetely a hint.

Hope these are useful. Thanks for asking :)

ENTP: Hey INTJ

INTJ: Hey ENTP

ENTP: Want to know something interesting I heard today?

INTJ: Sure, what?

ENTP: I heard you were going on a date with me.

INTJ: Where did you hear that?

ENTP: I don’t know. Is it true? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

INTJ: No.

ENTP: You sure? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

INTJ: ENTP, you would know if it were true…

ENTP: OMG, INTJ, I can’t believe how dense you are.

*3 hours later, INTJ talking with INFP*

INTJ: And then ENTP said… wait. OH FUCK

*INTJ to ENTP*

INTJ: …hey

ENTP: So you wanna go?

INTJ: …okay.

BONUS:

*ENTP to INFP*

ENTP: INTJ said yes ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)