fru-its and vege-tables

Eating fruit is okay

source?

date a girl who punches nazis

Maybe my non-Jewish followers could reblog this

I can’t believe a humble security guard saved our planet from the aliens.

Customers who get angry when I read them their total cost are so compelling to me. Take charge of your narrative, Janice. Be the hero of your own story. You are the one who is purchasing $113.67 worth of adult zen coloring books, Janice. It’s not me you hate, Janice. It’s not me.

anyway, men (for me, 9/10 times) suck at sex. like i don’t wanna swallow your load without getting a little bit back but like if you give me nothing i’m never calling you again. sorry.

What kinda sex you having 😩

bad sex girl can’t you read

Twilight may be trash but at least they cast actual native americans to play natives

The Twilight franchise was basically a great cast all trapped in hell together

I’m such a fan of low soft lighting like turn off that room light and turn on a lamp bitch

me as fuck