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mutual just posted "ok i'm normal now". objective: survive their reverse-chronological dashboard breakdown (wave 1 of 30)

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deathgasmic

who else is up permanently feeling like they did something Wrong

only-cat-memes

punkrock-bottom

Almost lost my life to the perilous charms of sweaty shirtless men in tight little shorts jogging as a speeding truck came my way.

escuerzoresucitado

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oftlunarialmoon

sibyllance

Apparently someone got their car stuck on the light rail tracks at Mt. Baker. For those unfamiliar this is 35 feet up in the air

longseasons

gwydionmisha

Bonus: If I buy a book I get to keep it! The publisher can't turn up at my house at random and confiscate all the books I bought.

slutdge

"make an account to-"

leggywormy

It's end of May, yall know what that means

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depsidase

toadalled

Thinking about how trains call to each other in the rainy night like whales do in the inky black of the sea.

thebelchers

Officially licensed Bob's Burgers Pride Merch via Toddland.com

albva

um. i think that will make an even awkwarder silence

no-one-offical

‎

unyieldingsilence

‎

albva

oh no you dont

🥚

thememedaddy

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certified-cervid

Collecting kitty orbs increases your meow score

venndaai

have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.

venndaai

they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.

their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.

longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years

toxic flesh

has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.

lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion

largest genome of any shark

eats everything including moose and polar bears

ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you

fluorescentbrains

this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard

just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !

muffinlance

Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!

Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir

I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks

what-tears-stuff

Aren't these the guys that also put like....bioluminescent little guys on their eyes to attract prey in deep waters like a fuckling angler fish? My brain is remembering the words "cope pods" I did a report on these guys in like elementary school

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