Whores These Days

scientists are trying to discover something harder than getting out of bed to go to work in the morning. and dont make a fucking penis joke ok they already checked everyone’s dick and it doesn’t even come close

9pm on a summer day is a god tier hour on planet earth

a mosquito wrote this

beautiful women named magenta cartridge low are trying to contact me on my printer

I will lock in tomorrow like nobody has ever locked in before

sometimes its just like *street lights reflecting off the wet asphalt at night* maybe life isnt so ugly after all

Very much related: I’d rather have a good ending than a sequel.

the concept of how sir arthur conan doyle was as a person always sends me into fits. imagine making the most famous literary character of all time but you hate the character so much you try to kill him off. but everyone is so horny for this asshole detective they make you bring him back. even your own mother gets mad when he’s dead because she likes him. raising your prices to ridiculous rates to avoid writing holmes stories backfired and now you’re rich. it’s absolutely a pain because it’s keeping you from your true passion which is spiritualism despite how one of your good friends harry houdini keeps telling you it’s bullshit. you consider your best novels to be historical ones but they’re well over shadowed by the nemesis of your own creation sherlock fucking holmes. some fake photographs from some kids convinced you faeries were real and you wrote a whole book about it. you started writing stories in medical school. and yes, also you are a doctor. after you’re dead, they erect a statue of sherlock holmes across the street from your birthplace, causing you to probably roll over one hundred eighty degrees in your grave and scream into your casket pillow.

This is so sweet how can I NOT reblog this. 

D’aaawwww.

All of the behind the scenes stories about Andre the Giant were adorable like this, Apparently Wallace Shawn is deathly afraid of heights, so he was freaking out while they were doing the scene scaling the cliff and Andre was like “it is okay, I’ll keep you safe.” there’s a behind the scenes thing on the DVD and everyone is choked up and misty eyed when they talk about working with him.

Andre the Giant was a radiant human being.

I’m so glad he gets to go down in history as everyones favorite giant. What a legacy!

It should be known that when he got back to wrestling after the movie came out he was constantly pulling other wrestlers into the locker room where he had a tv set up with a copy of the movie so they could watch. He was desperate for the guys to see it and he really wanted their honest opinion on his acting.

Have you noticed it's not the internet anymore. It's social media now

got tested for the sleepytired and it came back positive