I'm gonna say it, I do think that even the laziest person imaginable should have a roof over their head, food in their stomach, and access to healthcare

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

in accordance with the latest imperial decree we are removing all men from sports. if you want to continue to play you must take the estrogen immidiately

to reiterate: it is not importnat if you internally.consider yourself a woman just that it is now a requirement of sports you perform femininity. the purpouse of this decree is simple: we are seeking to creste a system.of gender thatll baffle archeologists and create endless discourse about "okay but was tom brady really transfem?" in the year 3000

it should be a commonly asked question if its even possible to meaningfully play basketball if you arent a lesbian. come.with me

there are some pretty good chalkboard gags in the early simpsons seasons but my favorite so far is definitely the one where bart is writing "i am not a 32-year-old woman" like aw honey don't worry. you will be