Let Me Just Rest My Head Here

i frequently miss previous food service jobs, not because i don't enjoy what i do now, but because i did genuinely enjoy those jobs too. the reason i left is because the expectation was that i either sell 40+ hours of my week to the job, regularly be physically injured with no support, either no or abysmal workers comp, inconsistent scheduling so it meant i had little to no life outside of work... and still, the actual labor of the job, i enjoyed. i enjoyed the people. i liked working with my hands and making people happy.

and you know, people often bring up customers as the reason to leave food service - this was part of my reason as well, but how much of that - like the unsustainability of working food service itself, bodily and monetarily - is manufactured? many of the people who were terrible to me working food service were often people working office jobs only marginally 'above' mine in pay and support, miserable with their own work, looking to exert some level of power they could over someone else.

Apologising for the harm that you've caused.

Trying to change your behaviour.

Accepting that not everyone will forgive you and they don't have to.

Things Accountability ISN'T:

Wallowing in your guilt until you think of yourself as nothing but bad.

Accepting an overly distressing punishment for your actions.

Twisting yourself into knots to make sure everyone knows how disgusted you are by yourself.

Marcia Lucas was the editor on 1983’s "Return of the Jedi" and the pre-"Star Wars" George Lucas-directed films "THX 1138" and "American Graffiti."

She was also part of the editing team for director Martin Scorsese’s 1970s films "Taxi Driver," "Alice Doesn’t Live Here Anymore" and "New York, New York."

Marcia Lucas was often called the unsung hero of "Star Wars," the original film that after sequels, prequels and spinoffs has come to be known by its subtitle, "A New Hope."

She convinced husband George that he should have Obi-Wan Kenobi, played by Alec Guinness, in his light saber battle with Darth Vader and become a spirit guide to Mark Hamill’s Luke Skywalker.

And she had to make sense of the raw footage that could’ve been a mess in the wrong hands, including the climactic rebel attack on the Death Star.

[....]

The next frame shows Gromit, a cartoony dog, who is stirring a cup of tea with a pinky extended, looking away from Wallace with his eyes wide and brow lifted like he is a little taken aback. The third frame shows him squinting at Wallace in polite disagreement or perhaps in a sarcastic placating manner.

I have begun, when I’m weary and can’t decide an answer to a bewildering question

to ask my dead friends for their opinion and the answer is often immediate and clear.

Should I take the job? Move to the city? Should I try to conceive a child in my middle age?

They stand in union shaking their heads and smiling – whatever leads to joy, they always answer,

to more life and less worry. I look into the vase where Billy’s ashes were – it’s green in there, a green vase,

and I ask Billy if I should return the difficult phone call, and he says, yes. Billy’s already gone through the frightening door,

whatever he says I’ll do.

her name was Marsha P Johnson, and we have her to thank for so much.

remember, the first Pride was a riot, and she was one of the brave souls who endured it to help carve the path which so many of us walk today. she helped found several activist groups regarding LGBT safety and wellbeing. and she was absolutely radiant, too.