soon your balls self castrate

the movie has been out for less than a week and i am already SO done with the fans on it (or at least the fans on instagram idk what you tumblr babas have had to say so unless the following things im gonna rant about apply to you dont take it personally ❤️‍🩹)

first off . genuinely EVERY EVERY EVERY time i see a comment under an instagram post saying they didnt like the movie, theres bound to be someone replying with the "Erm... sorry its not rhe Tiktok Weirdcore movie you wanted ☝️🤓" Omfg shut uppp 😭😭😭genyinely the way any criticism is faced by backrooms movie glazers is a coin flip with one side being slander of other backrooms interpretations and the other being some gen z attention span our-generation-is-cooked bs like its so hard to get these people (Once again mostly about instagram people idk enough about u tumblr babas ❤️‍🩹) to accept any other opinion but their own

not to mention i have seen so many people be like "Haha haters just mad cus theyre saying its not like the roblox game 😂😂" and not one person actually say theyre mad about that it feels like the whole "I heard Gen Z are trying to cancel Eminem" thing... or maybe its just a tiktok thing idk im not on tiktok

also ive seen lots of defense like "Ok its better/makes more sense when youve seen the original series!" Ok well i havent and i think its unrealistic to assume that every person going in to see the movie GLOBALLY RELEASED by a HUGE COMPANY that is being played in like EVERY CINEMA EVER has extensive knowledge of kane pixels backrooms series and its lore . 😭😭😭obviously i can see how the movie is more for fans of the original series but i see a lot of fans acting like the movie is Just for them only. i think this is a fault of a movie because surely there would have been some way to show at least a tiny bit more lore to make the movie more understandable/maybe even more enjoyable for the wider audience that the movie is made for. most people going into this movie realistically wont be like "Ah yes i see theyve made a series of the famous analog horror found footage series from youtube 🤔" theyre more likely to be like "Omg new A24 horror movie im gonna see that"

i loved the cinematography and the set design because im particularly geeky about that stuff but the plot and characters were just . 😭😭i didnt feel awfully compelled. i also can give a little more credit to kane since he is young and it is his debut and while i do think its very strong for a 19 year olds directory debut i dont think its that strong of a movie by itself.. 😞

and i also felt that they didnt really tie the different plot aspects together well. from what ive gathered, even from my small day-before knowledge of the original series, i swear that research agency thing is meant to be . pretty important???? but the things about it put in the movie felt too irrelevant and spaced out so i had basically forgotten about them by the time they showed up again

obviously i dont want to be spoon fed with the meanings and symbolism ect ect but i also wish the attempts at meaning and symbolism werent so hard to understand . obviously it was an attempt to be thought invoking and make you think but the only thing it was making me think about was Okay What Am I Gonna Google After This

i especially mean this with whatever was going with marys mother, it felt a lot more like 'Ok why are they showing us this' than 'Oh but what could this Mean....' which for all i know could just be me not thinking about it critcially enough but thats how i saw the movie

also the climax was just such a flop 😭😭😭having your whole movie be some psychological horror just for the climax to be the longest chase scene ever with the goofiest monster ever was just . Flop

captain clark was such a freaking flop i keep saying flop but i cant think of anything else😭 they had a whole movie of things that could easily be The Big Unsettling Scary Thing and they just chose some ridiculous looking creature dressed as a pirate to go run about. when your main big scary comes on screen in your big serious horror movie and everyone in the cinema laughs thats not a good sign. also i feel like it was just on screen way too long to maintain any of the scariness, even if it had any in the first place

this thing does kinda tie to my own personal horror preferences but i generally feel like unseen horror would have worked so so so much better than whatever that movie did and it would also be more aligned to the found footage style of the original series, especially considering the big scary creature wasnt scary at all 😭😭

overall movie kinda flop id say it was like 6/10 to me I really wanted to like it but.. 😞