fearless

jack of no trades. master of fuck all

cannot sleep too busy thinking of scenarios

the ability to say "i dont have a tiktok" in social situations makes me feel so powerful. like the general reaction is "shock, confusion, then this weird 'thats probably a good thing' response" its so fun

Tumblr users will see a post mentioning a day if the week and just fucking black out and reblog it

what if I wasn’t tired all the time imagine the possibilities

Okay maybe mama did raise a fool

i zoned out once in high school and never zoned back in

I don’t even procrastinate anymore I just straight up neglect 100% of my responsibilities

Four Seasons Total Landscaping Potter, you were named after the funniest thing I have ever seen,

Honestly shoutout to The Social Network for giving us the line “you’re going to go through life thinking that girls don’t like you because you’re a nerd. And I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, that that won’t be true. It’ll be because you’re an asshole” because if that doesn’t epitomize women’s feelings for entitled male nerds I don’t know what does

I think the most Gemini thing my dad has ever done is one year he threw himself a reverse surprise party for the sheer drama of it. What is a reverse surprise party? you may ask, well let me tell you. So he invites over all his friends and family and then in the middle of dinner he stands up and announces that it’s not a regular dinner, it is in fact, his birthday dinner (his exact words were “Surprise! …. it’s my Birthday”) cue everyone looking panicked, because oh god I don’t have a gift, I don’t even have a card, but my father, wine glass still in hand assures them not to worry and reveals a pile of presents he got for himself and wrapped for everyone to pick one and give it to him as their gift. And honestly? My father is such a legend.

i’m sick of covid … i miss seeing people… remember people? i remember people.