Men only want one thing and it's a hero's death in a place that looks like this.
- Milo Rossi, Miniminuteman
https://youtube.com/shorts/jDzxpU7meU4?si=SB0juTbUpUjFNQlT
trying on a metaphor

blake kathryn
DEAR READER
Three Goblin Art

if i look back, i am lost

@theartofmadeline
todays bird
noise dept.
wallacepolsom
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

#extradirty

shark vs the universe
d e v o n

Janaina Medeiros
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
taylor price
almost home
Xuebing Du

seen from Dominican Republic
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@wadwitchesonly
Men only want one thing and it's a hero's death in a place that looks like this.
- Milo Rossi, Miniminuteman
https://youtube.com/shorts/jDzxpU7meU4?si=SB0juTbUpUjFNQlT

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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"Tonight's selection includes Type O positive from our Pacific Northwest collection, AB negative from our Midwest reserve, and a special treat: B positive from our Mediterranean series."
The World's Whimpiest Vampire by Silvana Falcon
Wolfe hadn’t lied when he’d told Eric he hadn’t been unhappy before. But he supposed the truth was he hadn’t been happy either. He hadn’t known the difference. He knew the difference now.
Wolfgang by Grae Bryan
So my family has a Gay Pirate Plate.
Stay with me.
We do not know how the hell the Gay Pirate Plate was first acquired. This being a point of contention is actually pretty plot-relevant; the saga of the Gay Pirate Plate began with my grandmother and her sister, who, for some ungodly reason, both BADLY wanted the Gay Pirate Plate and believed it to be rightfully theirs.
I should back up, firstly, to establish: The Gay Pirate Plate is the cheapest, tackiest, ugliest plate in existence.
It is in no way a collector’s item. It is physically impossible for it to complement anyone’s decor, because the colors in it are garish. It’s just a ceramic plate with a gay pirate painted on it, and the painting is, this cannot be emphasized enough, extremely bad.
(How do we know the pirate is gay if he’s just posing on a plate? Listen. Fully 100% to stereotype, but he is. He is gay. There’s an energy. That pirate is a flaming homosexual. That pirate has sex with men and does it frequently. That pirate is fucking gay, all right, he just is.)
Anyway. The point is that this is an extremely cheap and ugly plate with a poorly-executed painting of pirate on it who is like a nine on the Kinsey scale.
My grandmother and her sister fought a blood feud over this plate for their entire lives. It would be on the wall in my grandma’s house, and then her sister would visit, and then it would be gone. She’d visit her sister and the plate would be on the wall and her sister would pretend it had always been there. She would steal it back, hang it up, and, when her sister visited, pretend it had always been there. This continued for DECADES.
When the sister died, the Gay Pirate Plate lived triumphantly in my grandmother’s house. And then my grandmother died. And my aunt, who had lived with her and been her carer throughout her life, rightfully inherited their house.
We visit my aunt after the funeral and stay with her for a week or two.
Me, my sister, and our dad. Her brother.
The three of us look at each other. We don’t say anything. We studiously avoid making eye contact with the Gay Pirate Plate mounted proud and ugly on the wall. We notice one another studiously avoiding looking at it. We notice one another noticing. We say nothing. We come to a silent consensus. We pack up to leave. We get in the van. Our aunt comes out to say goodbye. I loudly announce I need to use the restroom before we leave. She obviously stays outside to continue talking to my dad.
I take down the Gay Pirate Plate, stuff it under my oversized sweatshirt, go outside, and get in the van. She happily waves goodbye as we drive off.
Two days later my dad gets a phone call that opens with hysterical laughter and “You FUCKING ASSHOLE did you seriously STEAL THE PLATE–”
Anyway. The gay pirate plate lives in my dad’s house currently.
But he’s trying to get me and my sister out to visit him. And plate mounts are cheap.
The rules of Gay Pirate Plate are simple by the way.
The plate must be clearly and openly displayed in a place of great prominence whenever it is in your possession. When it is not in your possession, the display piece must remain in place. This is where you would put your gay pirate plate, IF YOU HAD ONE.
No active steps may be taken to prevent the theft of the Gay Pirate Plate. That goes against the spirit of the game, as does attempting to hide it.
The plate MUST be stolen and cannot be gifted or removed with permission. Should you witness attempted theft of the Gay Pirate Plate you are required to intervene and return it to its place.
Every time your sibling successfully absconds with the Gay Pirate Plate, you must respond with indignant fury, as if you have not also repeatedly and blatantly stolen the Gay Pirate Plate.
WOE
PLATE BE UPON YE
STATUS UPDATE
I texted this image to my family at around 2am their time last night and woke up to appropriately indignant messages about theft, betrayal, etc.
nothing could have prepared me for how gay the gay pirate plate was
It was always nice to know one's work had caused significant anguish.
All of Us Murderers by KJ Charles

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Fenn nodded. He’d never be able to call her that in a hundred years. He’d have to call her nothing and hope she didn’t notice.
Seducing the Sorcerer by Lee Welch
It may have made his stomach flip, but Cooper was used to that. And he was learning that maybe it was a good thing every now and then, to be uncomfortable in that way. Cooper had spent too long shying away from discomfort, caging himself in. It was a safer way to live, maybe, but it had also made his life lonely and small.
Calling Chaos by Grae Bryan
Miles was entirely too optimistic, but that made him who he was.
Accidental Bonds by Marie Reynard
Every time I reread a Goliaths of Wrestling book, I'm overwhelmed with a carnal need... to play Moth Simulator.
He was making breakfast for breakfast. It's like breakfast for dinner but it's during breakfast!
-A 7 year old

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You should love your body no matter what because it's keeping you alive. It's the shell that your stupid soul is living in.
- Nick DiRamio
https://youtu.be/nayLXEL04oM?si=FcQE37JJubVJqMbr
“I swear to god I’ll… Well, I don’t know what I’ll do, but it’ll be bad. Like, really bad. I’m super serious. Do not make me become a tyrant, because I will. I have the outfits for it already and everything.”
-False Comeback by Lily Mayne
I hope your parents got you a tombstone for Christmas!
- Marv Murchins
I never made it to the 6th grade, kid. And it doesn't look like you're going to either.
- Harry Lime
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York
Never forget.
People were, for the most part, good at heart. But there was always a small and unfortunately productive contingency of the population that would use any excuse to be unmitigated arseholes.
True Love Bites by Joy Demorra

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Lady Riya hummed thoughtfully. “Well, if it keeps up, I highly recommend the infirmary down by the square. They might be able to help.” “Oh yes, what a wonderful idea.” Mrs. Collins brightened. “The Viscount has done wonderful work there. Hardly anyone dies anymore.” “A ringing endorsement to be sure, Mrs. Collins.”
True Love Bites by Joy Demorra
“Listen, I think he likes you, and given how your previous encounters have gone, I don’t think it’s literally possible for you to fuck this up.” “That is both depressing and uplifting,” Oliver said. Gem grinned. “That’s my sweet spot.”
Passing Through Purgatory by Nik Knight