Monkey Royal

dividers: @/diviniyae

Sae blinks once.

He stares at the interviewer with the same expression he'd wear if someone had asked him why rain falls from the sky.

"She's strange."

The interviewer laughs softly. "Strange?"

Sae nods.

"She dislikes me and I don't know why."

His tone is completely matter-of-fact.

The interviewer chuckles.

"You've never asked?"

"I did."

"What did she say?"

"Nothing useful."

The corners of the crew's mouths twitch.

Sae continues as though he's discussing the weather.

"I've never done anything to her." Another beat. "As far as I remember."

The interviewer covers her mouth, trying not to laugh.

"So... she doesn't hide that she dislikes you?"

"No."

The interviewer finally regains her composure.

"So... do you dislike her?"

He looks vaguely puzzled.

"Why would I?"

The question comes so naturally that it almost catches everyone off guard. He genuinely sounds confused by the suggestion.

The interviewer smiles.

"Well... she doesn't seem very fond of you."

"...That's her decision." He shrugs. "It doesn't bother me."

Then, after a brief silence, he adds quietly,

"She's good to Rin."

The atmosphere shifts almost imperceptibly.

Sae's expression doesn't soften much, but his voice does.

"He laughs more and that's enough."

The interviewer smiles.

"So... you're happy for him?"

"...Yeah." He exhales quietly through his nose. "Football wasn't enough. He needed someone."

Silence settles across the studio.

The interviewer asks gently,

"And... Is she the right person?"

Sae answers without hesitation."Yeah."

The interviewer smiles wider.

"You sound very certain."

Sae sighs quietly.

"I've accepted it."

"You make it sound exhausting."

"It is, but..." He looks directly into the camera. "Rin's happy. So I don't care."

The interviewer smiles warmly.

"Sounds like you've accepted her into the family."

Sae's eyebrow lifts slightly. "I accepted her months ago but it seems like she hasn't accepted me yet."

The entire studio erupts, even the interviewer has to lower her cue cards because she's laughing too hard.

Sae watches everyone with complete indifference.

"I still don't know why she dislikes me."

By the evening... The interview is already everywhere.

You and Rin end up watching it together in the living room.

The television glows softly in front of you while evening sunlight filters through the curtains. Rin sits beside you on the couch, one arm lazily draped around your waist, your back resting comfortably against his chest.

The interview begins.

The moment Sae calmly says, "She's strange." you blink. And then slowly turn toward Rin.

"...Did he just call me strange?"

Rin stares at the television for another second before looking back at you.

"...I think he did."

You gape. "I haven't even done anything."

Rin looks at you. "You glare at him all the time."

You fold your arms.

"That's because he hurt you."

A quiet snort escapes Rin.

Then the interview continues.

"She dislikes me and I don't know why."

Both of you freeze.

You slowly look toward Rin, Rin slowly looks toward you.

"...Why does he sound genuinely confused?"

Rin doesn't answer immediately. His lips twitch.

"...Because he is."

You look at him in disbelief. "Whose side are you on?"

Rin answers without even thinking.

"Sae's."

Your jaw drops.

He finally snorts.

"I mean..." He squeezes your waist gently. "He's telling the truth."

You huff dramatically. "I don't like either of you."

The interview continues and then Sae says, "She's good to Rin." The laughter in the studio fades, so does yours.

Rin's arm tightens instinctively around your waist and neither of you looks away from the television.

"He laughs more and that's what matters."

You feel Rin go completely still behind you, so still that for a moment, you can hear nothing except the interview.

Then—"Football wasn't enough."

Your breath catches.

Rin lowers his head slightly until his forehead rests against your hair.

Neither of you say anything, there isn't really anything to say anyway.

Sae never speaks more than necessary, which somehow makes every word feel heavier.

Then the final line arrives.

"I accepted her months ago but it seems like she hasn't accepted me yet."

The studio bursts into laughter.

You don't, you simply stare at the screen.

"He..."

Rin finishes the sentence quietly." Has accepted you."

You blink several times. "When?"

Rin shrugs."...Probably before either of us noticed."

You let out a small, disbelieving laugh. "I've been preparing arguments every time I see him. And he just..."

Rin finishes your sentence. "...Didn't care."

You bury your face in your hands."Oh my God."

Rin finally laughs.

"I told you."

You peek at him through your fingers. "Told me what?"

"That's just how Sae is."

You groan.

"So I've been fighting an imaginary battle?"

"...Looks like it."

You narrow your eyes. "I'm still not apologizing and I'm still glaring at him."

"Ok?"

"I still don't like him."

"I know." Rin's smile softens.

"But..." He gently takes your hands away from your face. "...You'll still become his family."

You meet his eyes. They're warm, quiet, filled with that unmistakable affection that always seems reserved only for you.

He brushes a loose strand of hair behind your ear before resting his forehead against yours.

"...He wouldn't have said any of that if he didn't mean it."

You smile faintly.

Rin studies your face for a long moment before the corner of his lips lifts.

"And..." His thumb strokes your cheek. "...Now everyone knows."

You tilt your head. "Knows what?"

His smile grows just a little.

"...That my brother already considers you family."

Before you can answer, he leans in and kisses you softly.

When he pulls away, your forehead is still resting against his.

His voice drops into a quiet murmur.

"And in a few months..." Another gentle kiss. "...You won't just be my fiancée anymore."

His fingers lace with yours.

"You'll be my wife."

Heat immediately rushes to your face.

Rin watches you blush with obvious satisfaction before letting out the smallest smile.

"...Cute."

You hide your face against his shoulder with an embarrassed groan. "I liked you better when you barely talked."

He presses one last kiss to the top of your head. "...But you're still marrying me."

And despite everything, despite Sae's confusion, your one-sided rivalry and the entire football world teasing the three of you—

your thumb had hovered over his contact more times than you could count, guilt settling heavily inside your chest whenever you considered unblocking him. but something always held you back. pride, hurt, exhaustion— whatever it was, it kept you frozen, staring at his contact name as though it could somehow answer all the questions you were too afraid to seek.

—

on the other side of the world, sae was losing his mind.

five days of complete silence.

five days of his messages failing to deliver. five days of his calls going straight to voicemail. five days of not knowing what you were doing, or what you’d been up to since you had blocked him everywhere else too.

and yet, every morning before training, he'd find himself opening your chat anyway. he'd type out another message, watch the familiar ‘not delivered’ appear beneath it, then lock his phone with a quiet click before heading to practice. every night, he'd call out of habit despite already knowing it would go straight to voicemail. by the fifth day, he had memorized the automated voicemail greeting.

he sat on the edge of the bed in his hotel room, one hand resting against the back of his neck as he stared down at his phone, looking more worn out than usual. he was exhausted from training, irritated from the lack of sleep, while still carrying the weight of the upcoming matches. but none of it compared to the frustration & unease gnawing at him over the way things had fallen apart between you two.

“tch… this is annoying,” he muttered under his breath, brows furrowed deeply.

truthfully, he knew he had fucked up.

he knew his replies had been getting shorter, his attention split between training & the growing pressure of the upcoming matches. but the fact that you had deliberately cut him off completely—blocking him as though he were nothing more than another inconvenience—still felt like a punch to the gut. as much as it pissed him off, he knew he had no one to blame but himself.

and when you told him you were done, he had realized a second too late just how far he had pushed you up to that point.

he'd spent the first few days convincing himself that you simply needed space. if he kept forcing his way back in, you'd only resent him more; so he'd waited. he'd given you room to breathe, hoping you'd unblock him when you were ready. but by the fifth day, the silence no longer felt like space. it felt more like distance.

and for the first time in a long time, he found himself genuinely afraid that if he kept waiting, he'd lose you.

sae picked up his phone again, staring at the blank screen as though something might magically change if he looked at it long enough. then, with a sharp exhale, he stood and began pacing across the room.

“… fine,” he breathed, his frustration gradually hardening into determination. “if you’re not gonna answer, then i’ll make sure you can’t ignore me.”

the next morning, a series of knocks startled you awake.

you rubbed the sleep from your eyes as you made your way towards the front door, expecting a neighbor or perhaps a delivery meant for someone else. instead when you pulled it open, you were met with an enormous bouquet wrapped in crisp ivory paper, the pale pink tulips peeking out from between lush greenery, alongside a small ribbon-tied gift bag that was held carefully by a delivery man. you blinked in confusion as you signed for the items, a strange rush of nerves settling beneath your ribs.

tucked between the flowers was a small cream-colored card, a message printed neatly across the front.

i know you’re upset, but i’m not letting you disappear on me that easily.

open the box.

- sae

with unsteady hands, you reached into the gift bag and pulled out a small velvet box.

inside was a delicate necklace that looked far too expensive to have been chosen on impulse— a fine platinum chain with a custom pendant resting at its center. it has a miniature soccer ball encrusted with tiny pavé diamonds intertwined with a polished heart, a single larger diamond catching the light where the two charms met. when you carefully turned the pendant over, you found a few words engraved across the back in fine lettering:

‘no distance changes us.’

your vision blurred almost instantly.

you clutched the necklace against your chest, your thumb tracing over the engraving as though you needed proof that it was real. the last bit of anger you had been desperately holding onto began to crumble around the edges.

then, a few seconds later, another knock sounded through the apartment.

when you opened the door again, a second delivery man stood outside holding a paper bag from morethan bakery(which was your favorite bakery)— the familiar logo stamped across the front while the warm scent of butter & sugar somehow escaped through the neatly folded top.

“delivery for [y/n]?” he asked, glancing down at the receipt.

“y-yes, that’s me,” you answered, still struggling to blink away the tears gathering along your lashes.

after thanking him, you carried everything inside and carefully laid the enormous bouquet across the coffee table before opening the pastry box. inside were your favorite butter croissants, golden and flaky; still warm enough for their rich, buttery scent to fill your entire apartment almost immediately.

you simply stood there in stunned disbelief, letting everything sink in.

only after the initial shock began to settle did you carefully lift the necklace from its velvet box and fasten it around your neck. once the clasp clicked into place, your fingertips immediately found the pendant, pressing against it as though you could somehow feel closer to him through the tiny charm.

it felt exactly like something sae would do— express everything he couldn’t put into words through one carefully chosen gift, finding a way to reach you without demanding that you answer.

you took a small bite of the croissant, chewing slowly as your eyes drifted towards your phone lying beside the box.

for five days, you had convinced yourself that silence was easier than another half-hearted reply, easier than another reminder that loving someone across different time zones could sometimes feel lonelier than being alone.

but now, with an enormous bouquet of your favorite flowers spread across your coffee table & his necklace resting warmly against your skin, your resolve felt weaker than ever.

your thumb hovered over his contact again.

this time, you didn’t stop yourself.

*unblock*

for a few seconds, you remained on the screen, staring at his contact as though something might suddenly change.

but nothing did.

well, of course it didn’t. any messages he might have sent while he was blocked wouldn’t magically appear now that you unblocked him. still, you hated the pang of disappointment that crept inside you.

you didn’t even know what you had been hoping for. perhaps some impossible flood of missed messages, some proof that he had spent the past five days trying to reach you. some sign that the silence had indeed hurt him too.

then a bitter thought slipped into your mind.

he could’ve found some ridiculous way to reach you if he truly wanted to. spotify, shared notes, or even a new account made solely to get through to you. and yet, deep down, you knew sae well enough to know that if he had kept pushing— you probably would’ve hated that too.

a quiet exhale slipped past your lips, carrying some of the tension with it. before you could talk yourself out of it, you opened your chat with him & stared at the empty space beneath your last conversation.

your fingers moved before you could think too much.

[ 9:15 am ] you: i got them.

you stared at the message.

then deleted it.

[ 9:15 am ] you: thank you.

deleted.

[ 9:16 am ] you: sae, i—

deleted again.

you let out a shaky breath, pressing your lips together as frustration and longing tangled painfully inside your chest.

then, as though summoned by the thought of him, your phone buzzed.

your heart nearly stopped when you saw who the message was from.

[ 9:17 am ] sae ♡: did you receive it yet?

for a moment, you could only stare at the screen.

the timing was so coincidental that it almost felt as though he had been waiting on the other side the entire time, watching for the second you'd finally let him back in.

[ 9:18 am ] you: yeah…

three dots appeared almost immediately.

then disappeared.

then re-appeared again.

[ 9:18 am ] sae ♡: good.

you swallowed hard, glancing down at the necklace.

of course.

of course he would say it like that, as though he hadn’t just arranged for some of your favorite things to be delivered to your doorstep even while he was at an entirely different country.

[ 9:19 am ] you: you’re unbelievable.

his reply came only a few seconds later.

[ 9:19 am ] sae ♡: can’t believe you blocked my email too. seriously, my email?

you covered your mouth as a breathless giggle slipped out before you could suppress it. you couldn’t believe he had noticed that too.

[ 9:20 am ] you: well, i was mad. and you could’ve tried spotify.

[ 9:20 am ] sae ♡: spotify? we’re able to text people there now?

[ 9:21 am ] sae ♡: and i get it. you had every right to be mad.

your fingers hovered over the screen, but before you could respond, another message came through.

[ 9:22 am ] sae ♡: can we call for a bit?

your throat tightened.

for a second, you only stared at the message, your heartbeat suddenly loud in your ears. then your gaze flickered towards the time at the top of the screen.

9:22 am.

which meant it was a little past two in the morning for him.

your brows knitted together as the realization made something ache inside your chest.

[ 9:23 am ] you: aren’t you supposed to be asleep?

his reply came almost instantly.

[ 9:23 am ] sae ♡: yes

[ 9:23 am ] you: sae…

[ 9:24 am ] sae ♡: just answer the call.

before you could type anything else, his name lit up your screen.

incoming call from ‘sae ♡’

your thumb stalled over the green button before you finally answered.

the line connected instantly, and for a moment, neither of you said anything. all you could hear was the faint static of the call, the quiet rhythm of his breathing, and your own pulse beating far too quickly beneath your skin.

then his voice came through, low and rough with exhaustion.

“… you’re wearing it?”

your hand immediately rose to the necklace.

you hated how easily he knew.

“… how would you even know that?” you mumbled, hating how quickly your voice softened.

“because i know you,” he answered simply.

you blinked.

“w-well…” your lips pressed together as you struggled to keep your composure.

“… you’re not asleep?” you asked, changing the subject almost immediately. “it’s two in the morning there, sae.”

“couldn’t sleep.”

“because of training?”

“no…” he answered after a moment, the silence stretching around the word.

your chest tightened.

“then… because of me?”

he didn’t answer straight away.

then, quietly, he said, “because of us.”

your heart softened at the weight of his confession. you looked down at the half-eaten croissant in front of you, at the bouquet of tulips spread messily across your coffee table, at all the little reminders of him scattered throughout your apartment as though he had somehow filled the room without even being there.

“you know… you really didn’t have to send all of this,” you murmured, brushing your thumb over the pendant.

“i did.”

“sae…”

“you wouldn’t answer me.”

“because i was still hurt.”

“i know.”

his usual composure held, though something unguarded had begun to surface. “… i know,” he repeated, sounding more vulnerable the second time.

“i made you feel like you were asking for too much,” he continued, his grip tightening slightly around the phone. “and i shouldn’t have said what i said. i was tired & irritated, but that’s not an excuse.”

you swallowed hard, your eyes stinging at his words.

“you made me feel like i was bothering you,” you admitted, your voice beginning to tremble. “like wanting to hear from my own boyfriend was an inconvenience.”

sae didn’t answer immediately. for once, he allowed your words to settle instead of rushing to defend himself.

“i know you’re busy,” you continued, your fingertips catching the tears before you even realized you were crying. “i know how much your training and matches matter to you. but sometimes, it felt like i was always waiting for whatever pieces of you were left at the end of the day.”

his breathing shifted faintly through the speaker. “i didn’t realize it had gotten that bad.”

“well… it did.”

a long pause followed before he finally spoke again, the usual firmness gone from his voice.

“… i’m really sorry,” he breathed, guilt weighing heavily on every word. “for making you feel like you weren’t important to me.”

your face crumpled before you could stop it. you hated how badly you had needed to hear those exact words from him.

“and i’m sorry too…” you whispered. “for blocking you everywhere.”

“tch. you should be,” he replied dryly, the faintest trace of amusement slipping into his voice.

you laughed beneath your breath, wiping at your damp cheeks.

“you blocked my email.”

“well… i was fully committed.”

“but blocking my email was a bit excessive, no?”

“i was hurt, okay?” you huffed, though there was no real anger behind it anymore.

his voice softened again. “… i get it.”

with sae, it had always been this way. he rarely said more than necessary, but somehow; the few words he did give you always carried more weight than he realized. and when he truly meant something, you could feel it— even through the distance of a phone call.

“i-i missed you,” you blurt out, unable to keep the longing out of your voice.

sae went silent and for one terrifying second, you wondered if you had said too much.

then he exhaled softly. “i missed you too, amor.”

for a moment, neither of you said anything.

you stood beside your coffee table with one hand wrapped around your phone, listening to his breathing on the other end as though it were the closest thing you had to being held by him again. and eventually, you asked the question that had been sitting heavily inside your chest.

“so… when are you coming back?”

“next week,” he answered after a brief pause, his voice dropping slightly.

you let out a deflated sigh, disappointment settling inside you even though you had expected that answer.

“ohh…”

“i’ll be back soon enough,” he reassured, hoping it would ease some of the ache in your voice.

you looked down at the croissant in front of you and picked absently at its flaky edges. “i-i just… really really miss you a lot.”

on the other side of the world, sae’s expression softened, something tender flickering across his tired features at your honest confession.

“i know,” he murmured. “… and i miss you a lot too.”

a quiet pause followed.

“i’ll be back soon,” he promised. “and we’ll talk properly when i am.”

your fingers tightened around the phone.

“promise?”

“yeah,” he answered without hesitation. “i promise.”

you nodded even though he couldn’t see it.

“… okay.”

for the first time in five days, the silence inside your apartment didn’t feel so unbearable anymore. because even though sae was still thousands of miles away, you no longer felt like you were the only one holding on.

it’s been a few days since you’d unblocked sae, and the two of you had been texting ever since. well, that was until… he suddenly stopped replying to the last message you’d sent just the night before.

why wasn’t he answering?

you tried convincing yourself there had to be some kind of explanation. but after everything that had happened between you two, you couldn’t stop yourself from wondering whether he had suddenly changed his mind about fixing things.

beep.

you glanced down, expecting to see sae’s name, only for your sister’s contact to appear instead.

[ 2:20 pm ] sister: SISSYYY

[ 2:20 pm ] sister: please tell me you’re free tonight 😬

[ 2:21 pm ] you: yes i am…

[ 2:21 pm ] you: why tho?

[ 2:22 pm ] sister: the new restaurant that just opened near the waterfront

[ 2:22 pm ] sister: I WANNA CHECK IT OUT 😭

it wasn’t unusual for your sister to invite you out to dinner at the very last minute.

if anything, this was very much like her. she was always the first to discover new cafés & restaurants, sending you random food videos on tiktok and insisting the two of you ‘needed to try this place out before it got too crowded.’

so you didn’t think much of it.

[ 2:23 pm ] you: sure, what time?

[ 2:23 pm ] sister: 8:00pm? i’ll meet you there

[ 2:24 pm ] sister: ohh & wear something cute

[ 2:24 pm ] you: WHY would i wear something cute just to eat dinner with you?

[ 2:25 pm ] sister: because i’ll be wearing something cute & i don’t want to outdress you??? 🥱🥱

[ 2:25 pm ] sister: AND DON’T BE LATE

you rolled your eyes at her dramatics, though a small smile still tugged at the corner of your lips.

[ 2:25 pm ] you: whatever bye 🙄

the rest of the afternoon passed with you checking your phone more times than you could count, hoping sae’s name would appear at the top of your screen.

but every time you unlocked it, there was still nothing.

no reply, or an explanation.

just the last message you had sent him, still sitting on delivered.

by the time evening came, you had finally convinced yourself to stop staring at your phone as though it owed you something. you got ready for dinner slowly, standing in front of your closet longer than you meant to as your sister’s words echoed inside your head.

‘wear something cute.’

you huffed beneath your breath, pulling out an outfit and holding it against yourself in the mirror.

“… so extra,” you muttered, shaking your head.

still, you ended up choosing something nicer than what you would typically wear for a casual dinner. you made a few final adjustments to your hair, dabbed a little tinted gloss over your lips, and adjusted the necklace resting against your collarbone.

sae’s necklace. your fingers lingered there for a moment, brushing over the tiny pendant sitting warmly against your skin. you studied your reflection before tearing your gaze away and reaching for your handbag, refusing to let your thoughts drag you back to him again.

—

you arrived at the restaurant a few minutes before eight.

the place was already busy, golden light spilling through the glass windows and stretching across the pavement outside. every time the door opened, a rush of sound escaped with it— the clinking of cutlery, bursts of laughter, and the faint call of someone’s name from somewhere inside.

it looked newer than most of the other places along the waterfront, with polished wooden tables, low-hanging lights, and cream-colored walls that made the entire restaurant feel warmer than the evening air outside. a small line had already formed near the entrance. through the glass, you could see servers weaving between tables, plates balanced carefully in their hands.

you checked your phone.

still no message from sae. and nothing from your sister either.

frowning slightly, you began to type.

[ 7:56 pm ] you: i’m here. where are you? 🙄

a few moments passed before she finally replied.

[ 7:58 pm ] sister: omg sorry 😭

[ 7:58 pm ] sister: enter first!! i’m reaching soon

you sighed, already used to this.

of course she was late after repeatedly telling you not to be.

you waited outside for another minute, shifting your weight from one foot to the other as people moved around you in pairs & small groups. when your sister still didn’t appear, you finally stepped inside before you began looking too much like someone who had been stood up.

after making your way towards the hostess stand, she smiled politely and confirmed the reservation under your sister’s name before leading you towards a table near the window.

it was tucked slightly away from the crowd— close enough to watch people passing outside, yet secluded enough for the restaurant’s bustle to soften into distant background noise.

you sat down and placed your handbag on your lap.

five minutes, you told yourself.

you would give her five minutes before you started complaining.

while you waited, you opened the menu and scanned the different entrées available. pasta, grilled chicken, rice, steak, desserts— everything began blurring together as your attention drifted back towards your phone.

still nothing from sae.

your fingers tapped lightly against the edge of the table.

maybe he was busy.

maybe he was asleep.

maybe he had finally realized that fixing things from another country was more difficult than he’d thought. the possibility made your stomach twist, and you hated yourself a little for even considering it.

your sister was late. sae wasn’t replying. and somehow, both things were making you feel far more agitated than they should have.

another minute passed.

then another.

you glanced towards the entrance again, expecting to see your sister hurrying inside with that sheepish expression she always wore after keeping you waiting.

but she still wasn’t there.

instead, the hostess was speaking to someone near the front. you couldn’t see his face clearly at first. only the dark coat draped over his lean frame and the way his presence felt strangely familiar before your mind could make sense of why.

something inside your chest tightened.

then he turned slightly— just enough for the dim restaurant light to catch a glimpse of his reddish-brown hair and the familiar side profile you would recognized anywhere.

your breath stopped.

no fucking way.

for one impossible second, you couldn’t move.

you couldn’t even convince yourself that you weren’t imagining him; that missing someone hadn’t finally made you desperate enough to start seeing him in strangers.

then he began walking towards your table.

slowly.

your pulse thundered inside your ears with every step he took.

he stopped beside the empty chair across from you, one hand resting lightly against its back. up close, he looked tired. not the kind of tired you could hear through a phone call, but the kind that settled beneath his eyes, in the few loose strands falling over his forehead, and in the quiet heaviness of someone who had spent too many hours between airports and flights yet had still come anyway.

his gaze dropped first to the necklace resting against your collarbone.

the one he had arranged to have delivered to you. then his eyes lifted towards yours.

for a moment, neither of you said anything. the entire restaurant seemed to dissolve into a distant blur around him.

sae’s lips parted slightly before his voice finally broke through the silence, low and familiar enough to make your heart ache.

“hello, amor.”

your mouth opened, but nothing came out.

sae studied you for another second, his expression unreadable, though something softer flickered beneath his teal irises.

“you look beautiful…”

you blinked, still struggling to process that he was really standing there— about to sit across from you in a restaurant where you had expected to be eating dinner with your sister. your fingers tightened around the menu as though it were the only thing keeping you grounded. “… y-you’re supposed to be in spain,” you whispered, your voice barely carrying over the clinking plates and low murmur of nearby conversations.

“you said next week.”

sae pulled out the chair and sat down slowly, as though he were giving you time to adjust to the sight of him.

“i changed my flight,” he explained. “and i asked your sister to bring you here so i could surprise you.”

you stared at him, your heart hammering against your ribs.

“w-why didn’t you just tell me?”

“because then it wouldn’t have been a surprise.” his gaze briefly lowered towards your necklace again before meeting your eyes.

“and i wasn’t sure you’d agree to see me.”

the raw honesty in his answer stole some of the air from your lungs. before you could respond, a waiter stopped beside the table with a notepad in hand.

“good evening! are the two of you ready to order?”

you & sae both lowered your eyes to the menus, scanning the options quickly as the printed pages gave you both a brief excuse to look away. “um… i’ll just have the grilled chicken, please.”

“and for you, sir?”

sae’s eyes moved briefly across the menu before looking at the waiter. “the steak.”

“how would you like that cooked?”

“medium rare.”

the waiter nodded as he scribbled everything down. “anything to drink?”

“water’s fine,” you answered quietly.

“same as her,” sae added.

“perfect. i’ll put those in for you.”

you murmured a soft thank you as the waiter collected the menus and walked away. once he was gone, the tension slipped back into place. your fingers found the strap of your handbag again, twisting it loosely around your hand while sae remained still across from you, his attention fixed solely on your face as though he were waiting for you to pick up where the interruption had left off.

you drew in a slow breath, trying to gather the courage to say what had been sitting inside your chest for days.

“i was really hurt, sae…” you breathed, finally looking at him again. “it felt like i was always the one waiting— like i was bothering you every time i texted or called, y’know?”

sae’s expression remained serious, his attention fixed entirely on you.

“i understand that training is important, and i know how much your career means to you,” you continued, your voice growing quieter. “but sometimes it feels like i’m not even a priority to you anymore.”

sae remained silent for a long moment, his forearms resting against the table as he listened attentively to everything you had to say.

when he finally spoke, his voice was low and steady, though something remorseful lingered beneath it. “i was… too focused.” he said after a pause, his gaze briefly dropping. “i thought that if i kept pushing through the season, everything else would be fine.”

his jaw tightened faintly. “i didn’t realize how much i was shutting you out until things had already gotten that bad.”

he looked at you again, teal-eyes serious in a way that made your chest ache. “… i’m really sorry,” he murmured, his expression softening. “for making you feel like you were asking for too much. for the short replies. for making you feel like an inconvenience.”

he paused, his gaze holding yours.

“you’re not, and you never have been.”

your eyes began to sting.

you looked down at your hands, trying desperately to keep your voice steady. “i missed you,” you whispered, blinking quickly when your vision began to blur again. “even when i was angry, i missed hearing from you. i missed…”

your breath caught slightly. “i missed us.”

sae reached across the table, his larger hand settling over yours. his thumb brushed slowly across your knuckles— a small, grounding gesture that somehow felt louder than anything else he could’ve said.

“… i missed you too,” he murmured, his usual composure slipping just enough for you to hear the ache underneath. “more than i knew how to tell you.”

his fingers curled around yours.

“the hotel room felt too quiet & i kept checking my phone even when i knew you still had me blocked.”

eventually the food arrived, but neither of you touched it immediately as the silence between you felt different now. still heavy, but no longer painful.

“i don’t want us to keep doing this,” sae said after a moment, his voice low. “the distance. the arguments. feeling like we’re always one bad day away from falling apart.”

his thumb continued tracing absent circles over your knuckles.

“i want to be better at this,” he admitted. “for you & for us.”

you looked up at him, your eyes glassy. “i want that too,” you whispered. “but i don’t want to feel like i’m begging for scraps of your time anymore.”

sae nodded, gently squeezing your hand. “then we’ll figure it out,” he said, his voice calm but certain. “together.”

he held your gaze as he continued.

“no more shutting each other out. no more assuming the worst without asking. even when things get difficult, we talk about it.”

you let out a shaky breath, a small, tearful smile finally breaking through.

“okay…” you breathed, squeezing his hand back.

afterwards, the rest of the evening seemed to pass by in a blur. there were still things left to mend, but for the first time in weeks, neither of you seemed afraid of trying. the resentment that had once sat heavily between you had begun to loosen its hold.

when the bill arrived, sae was already moving. he placed his credit card onto the tray before you could so much as glance at the amount.

the waiter returned a few minutes later with the receipt, and sae signed it almost absentmindedly before setting the pen back down.

then he stood, pushed his chair back, and offered you his hand.

“let’s go home.” he murmured, the softness in his expression making your chest ache.

you looked at his outstretched hand for a moment before placing yours inside it. his fingers immediately intertwined with yours as the two of you walked out of the restaurant hand-in-hand. the soft noise from inside gradually faded behind you, replaced by the faint rush of passing cars & the muted sound of waves folding against the seawall.

the night air felt cool against your skin, but sae’s hand remained warm in yours, his fingers laced securely with your own as though he had no intention of letting go again.

18+

the ride back to your apartment drifted by in silence, but it no longer carried the weight it once had. sae’s hand never left yours, his thumb brushing slow circles over your knuckles the entire way. every now and then, you’d glance at him like you still couldn’t believe that the two of you were finally reunited after weeks of distance, arguments & almost losing each other completely.

when you finally stepped inside, the door barely clicked shut before sae had you pressed against it, his lips claimed yours in a desperate, heated kiss. his hands slid down your sides, gripping your hips as he pulled you flush against him.

“… missed you,” he murmured against your lips, his breathing already ragged. “so fucking much.”

you whimpered into the kiss, fingers threading through his hair as you pulled him closer. “then show me,” you whispered, nipping at his bottom lip.

sae groaned softly, the sound vibrating against your mouth. he lifted you effortlessly, your legs wrapping around his waist as he carried you straight to the bedroom and laid you down on the bed gently. the bulge in his pants was apparent, straining against the fabric.

he stripped you out of your clothes, eyes dark as he took in every inch of your body. it had been weeks since he’d last touched you like this, weeks since he’d been close enough to feel your warmth under his hands. when he finally settled between your thighs, sae didn’t rush. he started pressing light kisses all the way down your body, tongue teasing over your skin until you were trembling beneath him.

“sae…” you breathed, hips lifting instinctively as his mouth hovered just above your entrance.

he looked up at you, teal-eyes burning with desire. “let me take care of you.”

his tongue dragged slowly over your folds, tasting you like he had been starving for weeks. you let out a salacious moan, fingers tightening in his hair as he licked and sucked on your sensitive clit with focused intent, like nothing else in the world mattered but making you fall apart on his tongue.

“haaahhh— right there,” you gasped, back arching when he when he sucked harder on your swollen clit, tongue flicking rapidly against the sensitive bundle of nerves.

he groaned against you, the vibration sending sparks up your spine. he didn’t stop, tongue pressing firmer as he slid two fingers inside your core, curling just right until you were shaking. your hips bucked wildly against his mouth, pleasure coiling tighter and tighter in your belly as the combined sensation of his tongue and fingers pushed you right to the edge.

but no, sae wasn’t done yet.

he moved up your body, kissing you deeply again so you could taste yourself on his tongue. only then did he pull back to strip himself fully, tugging his shirt over his head before shoving his pants and boxers down in one rough motion. his gaze never left yours as he climbed back over you, one hand spreading your thighs while the other guided his throbbing length between them.

when he finally pushed inside you, it was slow and deep, stretching your walls open as he bottomed out. “… fuck,” he groaned, forehead pressed to yours. “missed this pussy…”

he started moving, hips rolling in a steady, powerful rhythm that had you moaning with every merciless thrust. his hand slid between your thighs, thumb circling your clit in slow circles as his cock plowed in & out of your greedy pussy, hitting that sweet spot inside you with every deep stroke.

“mine,” he rasped against your neck, biting down gently to leave a mark. “you’re mine.”

you could only babble his name, nails digging into his back as the pleasure built again, faster this time. sae’s thrusts only grew rougher, more desperate, his breathing growing ragged against your skin.

“s-sae— ah, fuck—” you cried out, voice breaking as your legs tightened around his waist. “mmngghh— feels so good—”

your hips rolled up to meet his thrusts, chasing the deep, delicious drag of his cock inside you. every powerful stroke made your toes curl, pleasure coiling tighter and tighter in your belly until you felt like you might just shatter from how good it felt.

“cum for me, amor.” he growled, the pad of his thumb pressing firmer on your clit. “let me feel you.”

your body convulsed beneath him as you felt your release rush up all at once, clenching around him as waves of pleasure crashed over you. sae followed right after, burying himself deep with a low, broken groan as he spilled his white-hot release inside you, hips jerking through every pulse.

afterwards, he rolled onto his side and pulled you into his chest, keeping you close like he couldn’t stand even an inch of space between you yet. his arms wrapped around you tightly, one hand stroking your back as you both tried to catch your breath after the heated session.

“… i love you,” he whispered against your hair, voice hoarse but sincere. “don’t ever doubt that again.”

you pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, eyes already heavy.

“i love you too, sae.”

⨳ 𝓷𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: someone commented— why didn’t he try texting her through spotify & i just had to incorporate that in 🙂‍↕️ but i genuinely don’t think he knows we can do that now…

© gojosteddy | please do not repost, plagiarise or modify any of my works

not a question, really. more like he couldn't believe what he was seeing. you just wrapped your hand around the base of him, looked up through your lashes and kept going. slow, deliberate, like you had nowhere else to be.

"shit, stop," he breathes, but the hand in your hair doesn't push. just sits there, fingers tensing slowly, like they can't decide. "that's—" he cuts himself off, and you feel it, the way he's already twitching back to half-hard under your tongue. so sensitive it must be almost unbearable. "…sensitive."

yeah. you know.

you take your time. lick up the underside of him like you're tasting something you can't get enough of and you hear the quiet inhale he pulls through his nose. you take him in slow, working him back up inch by inch, your hand following your mouth in long strokes. he's getting there faster than before. his body remembers you, always does. and the soft sounds he's trying to suppress are leaking through anyway, little cracks in the composure.

"you're—" he starts, then stops. you can hear him thinking. "fuck amor—."

you pull back just far enough to acknowledge him with a mhmm and then you take him deeper.

"god." it comes out low. almost reverent.

you want all of him. you want him wrecked, specifically. the same way he wrecks you without even trying. all those cool dismissive looks and rare moments when something warm cracks through and destroys you worse than the arrogance ever could. that strange clingy ache that's been sitting in your chest all day has been building to exactly this. you just didn't know it until now.

his fingers curl into your hair, not pushing, not pulling, just holding. "you feel so good," he says, like it slips out before he can catch it. quieter than his normal voice. more honest. "so perfect—."

your eyes flick up to his face and there it is, that unfamiliar softness he usually keeps locked away behind the cool arrogance. he's watching you. really watching you, teal eyes darker than usual, lip caught between his teeth.

he makes a sound he'd probably deny later. a broken little hitch in his breath, the kind that means he's losing the thread of his composure. his hips stutter up without his permission and he swears under his breath, jaw clenching, like he's furious at himself.

"enough." his voice has lost its edge. barely.

you pull back just to say, "no," and go right back to it.

"hey." firmer now. his grip tightens in your hair, not yanking, but directing, tilting your head back so he can look at you properly. his chest is heaving. "look at me when i'm talking to you."

you look at him. hold his gaze and keep your mouth on him and watch something unravel behind his eyes.

"fuck." he exhales hard. his head tips back for just a second before he forces it back down, forces himself to keep watching you like this is something he needs to see. "your throats taking me so well," he says. not a question. "made for me, aren't ya?"

you hum in confirmation.

his thighs are shaking. actually shaking. and his eyes are wet at the corners now, glassy, the hand in your hair gone tight again like he doesn't know if he wants to push you away or keep you there forever. when you look up at him his expression is completely unfamiliar, stripped of everything, overwhelmed in a way you've never seen on his face before.

"i can't," he starts, voice fractured. "you need to— god, stop, i—"

he comes apart again. less controlled this time. more desperate, his whole body pulling taut, back arching just slightly off the mattress before he catches himself. a low broken sound tears out of him, and his grip in your hair is almost painful, and you take all of it, every last shudder, until he's gasping.

afterwards you finally pull away, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand and you don't give him a single second to recover. you push him back flat against the bed, swing your leg over his hips, settle your weight on him.

"what are you—" he starts.

you grab a fistful of his hair. tilt his head back.

he goes still. teal eyes staring up at you, wet at the lashes, chest still heaving. something complicated crossing his face. not submission, that's not in his vocabulary, but something like recognition. like he's recalibrating. his hands come up to your thighs slowly, grip settling there, heavy and warm.

you kiss him. not soft. he makes a muffled sound against your mouth and his hands move to your hips immediately, gripping hard, because sae does not just lie there, he never will, but his grip is unsteady in a way that tells you everything about how he's feeling.

you sink down onto him and watch his eyes flutter. watch his head press back against the pillow. watch the line of his throat work as he swallows.

"look at me," you tell him.

he does. barely. eyes glassy and dark and fixed on you like you're something he can't quite name.

you ride him slow. hands still in his hair, lips dragging along his jaw, his temple, the corner of his mouth. all those places you've wanted to map out all day, that's where the clinginess was going, it was building to this, to having him like this, under you and undone.

"there you go," he murmurs, and his voice is wrecked, barely holding together, but there's something in it. approval. warmth. his hands guide your hips in that slow rolling rhythm, not controlling, just there. "that's it. just like that."

you press your face into his neck and shiver.

"good girl," he says, quieter. like he means it more than he wants to.

he thrusts up to meet you, still fighting for some foothold of control, still sae, but his breath is ragged and his fingers are digging into your skin hard enough to bruise and when you clench around him he actually groans, open and unguarded, the sound punched out of him.

"sae—"

"i know." his hand slides up your spine, presses between your shoulder blades, pulling you closer against his chest. "i've got you."

and somehow that's the thing that undoes you. not the stretch of him or the heat or the slow grind, but those three words said in that ruined voice. you come apart on top of him, shaking, his name breaking in half on your tongue, and he holds you through every second of it, hips working up into you, murmuring something low against your hair that might be good girl again or might just be your name, you can't tell, you can barely hear anything.

he follows you over the edge again with his face pressed into your hair and both arms locked around you, his whole body going rigid before he shudders and stills.

when you finish the third time between you, he doesn't say anything.

you collapse beside him. the sheets are a wreck. the room smells like sweat and sex and you can feel the pulse in your own thighs like a second heartbeat. every muscle feels liquid and loose. your lips feel swollen and your scalp tingles where he had his hands.

sae lies there for a long moment, arm over his face, chest rising and falling slowly. you watch the wet tracks at the corners of his eyes, already drying. he'd hate that you saw that.

then slowly, without looking at you, he reaches over. finds your wrist in the dim light. wrapping his fingers around it, keeping you by his side.

he doesn't say anything. doesn't have to.

that ache in your chest from earlier, the one you couldn't name all day, finally settles quiet.

Taglist: @inu1gf @143-ilyuu @irethepotato @mikemsmm @bbladie @sky-casino @thetwinkims @elemayooooooo @angelhqlo1111

✧˖*sae itoshi

he was ready to leave for practice, bag slung over his shoulder. you walked him to the door holding his water bottle. before he left he looked at you with a soft and loving gaze and leaned in to kiss you. but at the last minute, you swerved, feigning concern about his shoelaces. when he ties them, he leaned in again and you dodged it once again by saying you left the oven on. he was genuinely confused under that blank expression.

“did I do something?”

“oh, no. why?”

his brows furrowed while he watched you leave for the kitchen. he followed you, hovering at the entrance of the kitchen and he announced “I’m leaving now”

“okay good luck at practice” you walk up to him. he was expecting a kiss. But you gave him a hug and skipped away. he left anyway. upset and confused. and with no goodbye kiss

“sae-chan is distracted today what happened?” shidou questioned as he inched closer to sae.

sae, inching away from him, “mind your own business you horny demon”

his jaw was tight. the events of the morning plagued him so much. he started questioning everything: had he done something wrong? did he upset you somehow? did he forget something important? is she pranking me?

whatever the reason was, it subtly tormented him for the rest of practice. and shidou was right—he was distracted..

by the end of practice, he was a mess. he replayed every interaction you had with him in the morning, over analyzing every action, word and moment.

when he got home, he sought you out immediately. found you laying on the couch, on your phone completely unaware of the emotional torment you had put him through. he walked up to you, gently grabbing your chin to face him.

“did I upset you in some way?”

“no you didn’t”

he searched your expression for a lie but found none. “okay” he let out a soft sigh and his shoulders relaxed.

still holding your chin, he tilted his head and gave you a slow, passionate kiss.

✧˖*julien loki

the moment you dodged his kiss at the last second, he paused. his eyes narrowed and a smug smirk formed. “interesting” he teased “is that how it is now?” Before you could react he walked away.

he made you play the long game and good god did he make you feel every second of it. he constantly and relentlessly teased you.

he deliberately spoke near you, tempting you and when you tried to kiss him he pulled away. and he wasn’t subtle about it either. he would straight up seduce you, his lips grazing yours, but when you try to close the gap he dodged, pulled away or straight up blocked you.

it became a game of who would cave in first and it was clear that it wouldn’t be him.

“oh cmon it was a joke give me a break”

“hmm no. youll crack before I do.”

it has been three days, and he still hasn’t kissed you. you marched into the kitchen and cornered him. “im tired of this” you cupped his face and leaned in to kiss him. But he swerved. You let out an exhausted sigh. “okay fine you win” you said, head held down, under your breath.

a smug smile formed and he tilted his head to see your expression. “whats that?”

“I said you win. happy now?” you snapped and stomped away in defeat. he gently grabbed you by your wrist and pulled you back

“no need to be so snappy, mon amour” he slid his arm around your waist, his face inches from you with a childish grin. “you were the one who started this” he began kissing you slowly and deliberately from the neck going up, to your jaw, then your cheek. his thumb was teasingly tracing the pattern of your lips, as if he wanted to kiss you. you leaned in and he pulled back, with that sly grin.

you huffed and pushed him away, but he cupped your face and leaned in, finally kissing you, slow and deep like he was trying to compensate for the last three days. you felt him smiling against your lips at your defeat.

✧˖*michael kaiser

michael did not take it lightly. You were in the kitchen completely absorbed in whatever you’re doing. he came up behind wrapping his arm around you and turned you around. he began to kiss you slowly from your neck, then your jawline, then cheek. when he reached your lips, he leaned in but you swerved. “what?” “hm?” “why did you dodge my kiss?” “I didn’t?”

he tried again and leaned in but you dodged it again and ducked out of his embrace.

“big mistake, liebe” he yelled lunging at you.

you scurried out of the kitchen, your laughter echoing in the corridor

“you think this is funny?”

your home was a battlefield. he chased after you. you were doing the most: jumping over sofas, crawling under tables, running into the kitchen and circling the island a couple of times.

when you ran into the bedroom you were at a dead end. he cornered you in the bedroom and pinning you down onto the bed. you were still laughing.

“game over, I win” he said, chest heaving. “and now im going to take my prize”

“no fair you cheated” you protested, still breathless from the running and the laughter.

“schatzi, you don’t know?” he purred, his lips hovering over yours. “I always get what I want."

he claims the kiss he’d been chasing you for. it was a deep and possessive kiss, stealing your breathe once again.

he pulled back with a smug grin, he traced your lips and kissed you again, softer and needier. he whispered between the kiss “never again, Schatz.”

✧˖*reo mikage

reo was genuinely offended. he went through the five stages of grief.

first, denial. he was in utter disbelief and couldn't fathom what was happening. noone's ever withheld affection from him before. especially not you. then anger. not at you, but at himself. he started replaying every interaction and revised every date, wondering what he'd done wrong or forgot an important date.

then he started bargaining: what if she forgot? what if I'm reading into it too much? what if she is pranking me?

then depression: he mopped around the whole day, his head down and did not want to do anything.

but he didn’t go through the acceptance stage. he refused to.

it became a mission to win you over. he bought you the most expensive flowers and showered you with gifts, as an apology for something he didn’t know he did wrong.

“reo enough!!” you yelled

“no. are you still mad at me?”

“I was never mad at you?”

“you didn’t kiss me”

“oh my gosh, I cant joke around with you”

reo paused. “IT WAS A JOKE!!?? WHY WOULD YOU PREY ON AN INNOCENT MAN LIKE THAT”

“I DIDN’T THINK YOU’D TAKE IT THIS FAR”

there was a moment of awkward silence after the yelling match. reo began to pout. you sighed and pulled him in by the collar and kissed him. it was brief and sweet. “happy now?”

“no” he pulled you in by your waist and kissed you, like he was compensating for lost time. he pulled back, his lips still lingering on yours. “don’t joke around like that” he placed a kiss on your cheek, hovering over your ear. “just don’t stop kissing me.

✧˖*seishiro nagi

you didn’t kiss him good morning, but he did not think much of it. you probably forgot. so he didn’t make much of fuss. but when you left for errands without a goodbye kiss, he became a bit confused. when you came back and didn’t kiss him, he noticed the pattern and he did not like it..

nagi didn’t think much about anything. but this? he started to think too much into it. were you fed up with his laziness? you always initiated kisses. it never seemed to bother you much. but now that you’re not giving him any attention at all, and it sent him into a spiral.

you noticed it immediately. he hadn’t touched his gaming gear for the whole day and he followed you around like a lost kitten.

“are you okay, sei?” you asked.

“yea” he said,but he his eyes were desperate.

he clung to you like a baby koala. sitting so close to you or resting his chin on your shoulder while you're doing dishes or waiting for you outside the bathroom door. he wanted you to address the situation, to notice his despair.

finally he was fed up. He cupped your face, murmuring “why are you not kissing me? are you mad at me?”

he didn’t give you a chance to answer. he softly squeezed your face making your lips pucker up and gave you a clumsy kiss.

when he pulled back he looked at you with a soft, relieved expression. “don’t do that again. it felt so wrong”

♡ top divider: @designlikenonsense butterfly dividers: @moonstoneandmoonlight

♡ a/n: this has been in my drafts for a while. proofread to an extent

♡ pardon if there are any mistakes. english is my first language, but I'm still on the learning curve of actually writing.

♡ thank you for reading and feedback is appreciated

sae’s expression softened just a fraction before he leaned in, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “you’re not too much,” he murmured against your skin.

“you’re carrying our baby. i’m sure i can handle a few mood swings,” he reassured, his thumb rubbing slow circles against your upper arm.

you sniffled at his comforting words, burying your face into his chest. instantly, he tightened his arms around you, holding you a little closer as his chin came to rest lightly atop your head.

not even a few minutes later, you suddenly sat up, eyes wide.

“sae… i really want b&j’s strawberry ice cream. with pickles.”

he blinked once, almost like he was trying to process the food combination.

“… pickles?”

you nodded seriously. “and spicy ramyeon.”

he stared at you for a long moment, clearly questioning every life choice that led him here. but he instantly stood up, grabbing his keys from the table. “i’ll be back in 45 minutes.”

you watched him head for the door, heart swelling even as fresh tears pricked your eyes.

“s-sae?”

he paused, looking back at you.

“thank you… for dealing with me. i know i’ve been a lot lately.”

his teal eyes softened as he walked back over, cupping your face with both hands before pressing a soft kiss to your lips.

“you don’t have to thank me,” he said quietly. “… this is what i’m here for.”

you let out a watery laugh, lifting a hand to wipe away the tears rolling down your cheek. “i love you so much,” you mumbled, leaning into the warmth of his palms.

sae hummed, kissing the top of your head. “i love you too, amor.” he reached for his keys again, a faint smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

“now stay put.”

𝐞𝐯𝐚’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 💌 ⸝⸝⸝ we love soft husband sae over here