whimsical demon

WRONG, Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer (ok ill shut up about comparing phm to random stuff i brainrotted over years ago now lmao)

a concept I cooked up, it was pretty fun :D hope it's more or less canon compliant

"come again?"

"i learn more from thinking machine. human gender preference. attraction to same gender, means word 'gay.' all eridian same gender." rocky stands straight up. "rocky come out to grace now. all rocky plural gay, statement."

"...wow, that's... rock, i'm not sure it makes much sense to apply human ideas of sexual orientation to a monogendered species."

a long and judgmental pause. then:

bc i cannot overstate the potential of the dynamic between Ryland "middle school teacher" Grace and Artemis "teenage mastermind who hates being treated like a child" Fowl and i think they would be great friends (eventually) (other random headcanons for this AU below)

Grace would default to treating Artemis like one of his students at the beginning, because why wouldn't he? Artemis looks like a teenager. but then he finds out that this random teenage boy has written multiple phd level research papers under various aliases and stops. but by habit he'll still do it from time to time, which very much annoys Artemis lol

Artemis would find Grace's paper on the Goldilocks zone interesting and wouldn't outright consider it wrong/invalid, so he won't argue/insult him about it but he will (very proudly) scientifically dissect/point the flaws out in his argument with logic, much to Grace's annoyance. but artemis is also the type who, if he met the guy who grace called a "staggering waste of carbon", would say that to his face very loudly and very clearly and with a very threatening 7 ft tall eurasian bodyguard next to him. meanwhile Grace is trying to get him to stfu bc to him its embarrassing.

Grace would crash out after regaining his memories of how he ended up on the Hail Mary and think of himself as a coward, and then there'd be Artemis being bad at emotions and also regaining his memories so he tells grace smt like "oh don't guilt trip yourself over that. trust me, that's not even that bad" ((arty it's not that bad but thats only because his worst crime was running for his life and your worst crime is kidnapping and extortion to exploit another sentient being))

holly & rocky would get along so well together (and probably bond over the fact that artemis & grace's lifespans are wayyyy shorter than both of them and they'll both die before those 2. but thats a brick i will throw another day.) i like to think the gift of tongues that the fairies' magic possesses still works for Eridian, so you'd just have holly & rocky yapping to each other in fluent eridian while grace & artemis look on in mild confusion.

this AU would take place chronologically after the Last Guardian and before The Fowl Twins in the AF timeline-

this was just some quick silly self-indulgent stuff bc this week was prolly one of the most stressful weeks in my life :,D but yes ill expand on + draw more stuff for this au (maybe write smt later on) after my exams (which are currently deep frying me) bc i dooo kinda have an idea of how the story would go.

Some incredible artwork in here.