VineShield

BAGEL!

The person who locked the doors in their faces is my hero.

@rob-anybody If anything was made for your “cats are inherently ridiculous” tag, it’s this utter goober.

Sorry ma'am, just doing my job. Got a work order that your clothes needed more cat hair on them.

For the love of God, sound on.

Why are bugs so obsessed with looking like plants be yourself

A bird wrote this

My boss’s first language isn’t English. However, she loves giving inspirational speeches to everyone. I think today she was trying to tell us “don’t just stand around looking pretty”, but what she actually said was “WE DONT HAVE TIME TO BE SEXY”.

It reminds me of my Russian boss at the bakery. I didn’t wrap the bread correctly so she told me to “Snuggle like baby. Bread is your baby, Shelly. It’s sweet and gentle. Fragile, Italian.”

deleting files is such a rush… freeing up disk space… oh baby

the best thing in the entire goddamn world is the fact that human beings have hands perfectly capable of giving amazing scritches and there are hundreds of animals out there who just love being scritched

My pets keep me for because of my opposable thumbs.

Guess I’ll order food then.

achilles’ heelys

i love this so much i dont know where to start - the comedy itself - the commentary on ‘what is art’ - further on what is art: the viewers are interpreting this as art, but the intention of the “artist” was not actually art, so is it art or not? who gets to decide, the viewers or the creator? - the act of placing the glasses and watching the response (and the response itself being that the viewers treated the glasses as art) as performance art like is this a critique of postmodernism? does the critique betray itself since (one could argue) the viewers interpreting the glasses as art makes them art? or is that so ridiculous that it doesn’t matter? i could go on

art happens in museums whether you like it or not

I’ve always respected that last uplifting, quietly threatening comment.