May Hope Lead You Home

You find yourself with Sukuna’s takeout on the table, Nanami’s gift in the shoe area of your duplex, and thankfully nothing of Satoru’s. You were hoping to have a relaxing night for yourself… after the aftermath of the great breakdown of your 21st birthday… whatever.

You can still have a relaxing night, take a shower, maybe even masturbate before then and then feel refreshed right after. Put on a drama you’ve been wanting to start, where the male lead actually pursues and cherishes his female lead. Where she doesn’t have to chase after people who don’t want her.

You very much felt like a male lead.

Always chasing after people who didn’t want you in hopes they would eventually want you. Right. You’re resilient, not delusional.

But why now? You’re retracing your steps, walking through what could have led up to this. The only thing that can be said is when you crashed out at your (and Aimi’s) 21st birthday party.

But let’s take it back to when you first got the duplex. Before you found the three stooges at your doorstep.

You had first gotten the duplex and managed to make it liveable by moving all your current furniture (bedroom stuff only) and settled on making something for lunch.

Your phone screeches in a series of high pitched repeating rings, flinching at the sound. You know that ringtone, set specifically for your parents—both mom and dad so you don’t know which one’s which—you pick up your face down phone immediately, not bothering to check the name of the caller.

50-50, it’s either going to be mom or dad. You’ll take the gamble on it being your dad. At least you hope it’s him.

“Hello?”

“Happy late 21st! Why do I hear that you upset Aimi?”

Dammit it’s mom.

“You’re three months late, and me and Aimi don’t get along anymore.”

“She’s your baby sister.” She continues.

“By 10 minutes.” You groan, moving over to the couch and slouching onto the cushions.

“You both aren’t on speaking terms. Why? Is it because of the gifts we sent? Did we mix up yours and Aimi’s?”

“No, mom. Your gifts for us didn’t arrive yet. They’ll come in next week.”

“A shame. If you don’t talk to your sister by then you both won’t be able to exchange the gifts because I really do think me and your father mixed them up.”

“I’ll live. She can have them both.” You damn near snap to her. But your mom ignores the tone indication for something else.

“And I hear you moved out into a duplex. From the mansion? The mini-mansion’s big enough so that the three of you can go day to day without bumping into each other.” Your mom scoffs, affronted with the stark change in your living standards.

“Being in a different zip code isn’t far enough. If I had the capabilities I would’ve moved to Shanghai, I hear they have nice high rises.” You roll your eyes.

“Honey, we already went to Shanghai. The only thing that’s good there is the fashion and the beauty. Oh they have beautiful men—your father and I just visited last week..” She’s gone onto a long winded ramble about the overseas adventures her and your father have.

“… why aren’t you talking to Suguru either? He’s your big brother. You can’t be left alone for too long, go and be a brat at home. I can’t believe you’d go and buy a duplex, the least you can do is—“ the conversation finally picks up on something you think is worth commenting about.

“No. I used this money out of my allowance and I refuse for any of you to guilt trip me into going back home and feeling bad for using it on real estate!” At this point you’re huffing, catching your breath. “Didn’t you and dad tell us to get started on our investment portfolios?”

“For stocks honey, stocks! Not real estate!”

“Whatever. If Suguru made you call me then tell him he can come see me himself if he gives that much of a damn.”

“Don’t talk—“ You end the call on your mom there, and find the mute button to her icon on the messaging app on your phone. She’s going to lecture you on being more respectful of your brother and stop feeling or being petty to Aimi.

Your phone pings again. You expect it to be your dad messaging you after the argument with your mom but instead find it’s Suguru.

Suguru: How is settling in?

Is that all he has to say?

You moved into the duplex just three months after finalizing everything after your (and Aimi’s) 21st birthdays. You decided on it after… well…

Suguru only started messaging you daily since you moved out. Simple things: How is your day?; did you eat something?; what did you eat today?; how are you holding up? And how are you settling in?

He’s asked that one like 3 different times. You haven’t responded to him, but you do make sure to let him know you’ve read his messages. It honestly makes you uncomfortable; you are hyper aware of how much he’s trying to care for you now. After the birthday incident and all.

However, right now you wish to be alone. To spread your wings and pursue your passions and dreams without judgement.

You don’t know what you’re going to do about the second half of the duplex but you plan to rent it out and earn passive income that way (even if you managed to purchase this property in full). You still want to have a safety net.

You also wanted to get away from everyone. Fully disembark from your brother and sister’s social circles to discover yourself.

Yet you found yourself here, with three men at your door and nonetheless not exactly where you started but fearing you’ll be pulled back into the fray.

~*~

4 months ago was when yours and Aimi’s 21st birthday came around. Your parents weren’t going to be there at the time and so it was just you, Suguru, and Aimi… and all of their friends. You effectively had none so nothing for you to worry about.

Because it was your 21st, Aimi wanted a large party thrown. Pink and black themed—she had initially said she was going to be wearing all pink, making you wear all black but you refuted that—the both of you wearing a pink and black themed outfit.

Of course Aimi refuted a bit more after your concerns but she eventually gave in when Suguru came around to appease her. Driving her focus onto the cake you both agreed on would be a raspberry-strawberry mixture with cacao; thankfully that aspect was easily solvable.

But that didn’t stop from more hiccups from darkening your mood—and eventually ruining your 21st—through the process, Sukuna and Satoru were more than willing to help with setting up the party.

“Hell no, balloons should not be the main decoration. Are you two? Is Aimi twelve? The hell.” Sukuna’s snarl could be heard from upstairs. You can just imagine the scowling of his face and the gentle scrunch of those inked out tattoos.

“I’ve known Aimi since she was twelve, mind you. The pink balloons aren’t just any regular balloons.” You can just see it now, Satoru slapping the uninflated balloons at Sukuna’s chest as emphasis. “They’re metallic. Some of them are see-through and have special confetti inside the balloon that’s black. It fits the theme!”

“Balloons are basic as shit!”

“Oh yeah smarty ass pants?” Satoru challenges. “You got anything better? I think your nasty cigarette smoke rotted your brain.”

“I don’t want to hear about my brain being rotted when you consume more sugar than the recommended average.”

“Guys!” Aimi, light of their life. The sun to Suguru’s moon. Ever so shining, breaches their path and rewards them with her presence. “Why are you arguing? I’m trying to figure out how I want to do my hair! And I can't hear Clairo or Laufey over your shouting!”

She’s strutted down the stairs with her hair half up, half down in space buns with the most beautiful curls. You can tell it’s still unfinished with the chunky pins in her hair that are clamping the curls in place but to the two of them, she’s the most exquisite thing to ever walk planet Satoru and planet Sukuna.

“He’s a basic bitch that just wants to put balloons everywhere.” Sukuna points at Satoru.

“He’s a mean little freak that thinks his idea is so much better just because it’s different.”

“No—“

“Okay, show me the balloons.” Aimi takes a manicured finger and curls it her way multiple times while her arms are folded over her chests.

Satoru, in Satoru-fashion, holds the balloon in front of him by its tied tip and rotates it with the twist of his wrist. The other hand embellishes the rotation of the balloon with a curved set of fingers effortlessly showing off the shape and detail of the balloon.

“I like them. Now what about you, Suku?” Her eyes shift towards Sukuna. He teeters slightly on both feet before bringing out a lantern, its paper body a pastel pink with black adorned bows along its structural wires.

“Both. I want both.”

“Both?!” Satoru and Sukuna repeat at the same time.

“Yes.”

“BOAF?” Yuuji.

“BOAF!” Nobara.

From the door, Yuuji and Nobara are the first to embrace Aimi. The both of them overtly pulling their faces away from Aimi’s head so as to not crumple her curls. When Yuuji pulls away first he gives a nod into your direction, then turns to Sukuna to chatter. While Nobara keeps both hands on Aimi’s shoulders, looking down at her with an extreme reverence.

“Happy birthday girl! You look so gorgeous. Wait—you haven’t done your makeup yet.” Nobara leans closer.

From behind Nobara; Maki, Yuta, Toge, and Panda have swarmed around her. Aimi’s smile deepens when she pulls Nobara’s hands off her shoulders to take the others in for a warm hug, shifting her face away to avoid damage to her curls and makeup.

“That’s because I was waiting for you to come, silly! I want your help with my makeup and my gem placement. I’m trying to do my eyeliner and eyeshadow to look like a butterfly but if I want gems then where should I put them?”

Nobara’s eyes glisten with the warmth of the sun while her mouth widens. “Oh my gosh, you have to show me the inspo pics. I can see the vision already. Did you want the liner to be majority black with pink elements or do you think—“

“Hold up, crazy kids.” Suguru intervenes with a clamp onto Aimi’s head, wary of the pins in her hair keeping the curls together. “Don’t mess the place up before we have it finished. Also, don’t let this one go down before we even finish decorating.”

Aimi gives a faux awe and melts into Suguru’s arms with an arm against his waist while she looks up. “But what if I just want a little peek?”

He ‘boops’ her on the nose in return with the tip of his finger. A fond smile taking place. “That would defeat the purpose.”

There’s a subtle ache in your heart that pricks the left side of your jaw when you watch your older brother go through the motions of kissing Aimi on the forehead. Her whines and complaints about him messing up her makeup and hair going to the wind when he lifts and twirls her around.

You decide it’s enough cucking yourself when it comes to family-friends and family. You come down the stairs and ignore the flickering speck of attention you get from everyone else when you make your way to Suguru and Aimi’s side.

“Oh.” Suguru lets out, putting Aimi down and laying his attention onto you. You partly expect him to take you into a warm half hug like with Aimi earlier, maybe a forehead kiss too, or even a simple happy birthday.

Instead, all he does is pat you on the shoulder and pull you into an awkward side hug.

“Go get ready.” The speck of attention you managed to recieve is now spread elsewhere.

“Sukuna and Satoru I’m going to pick up the cake, I don’t want to see the place burnt down if you guys argue.”

“Aye-aye sir.” Satoru’s lips spread into a wide grin when he went into grabbing more uninflated balloons.

Sukuna scowls, following Satoru’s actions. “Hey asshole, she wants both. We need to make it an equal balance.”

The two of them trail off into the party room.

Maki lifts up one of her hands with a larger gift bag and a smaller gift bag. Alongside her, Yuta, Panda, and Toge also have gift bags. “I’ll put these away in the room. We’ll meet you upstairs.”

Nobara is already following Aimi to her room while Yuuji is being pulled away by Sukuna to assist in decoration.

Now it’s just you and Suguru.

“You sure you don’t want to invite any friends?” Suguru turns to you, lips pressed into a tentative grin. No, because you don’t have any.

You smile in the faux way Aimi does, attempting to imitate the playful way she does it. Albeit, the poor man’s version. “No, it’s fine. I have you!”

Since Aimi will be too busy tending to the three million other people she invited, you’ll at least be able to have a speck of Suguru’s attention to yourself.

When you meet Suguru’s gaze, he only gives you a weary smile.

“What?” You try, brazenly throwing him a nod into Aimi’s direction. “You don’t agree? Wouldn’t Aimi be too busy with her friends?”

Suguru only laughs. “I’m sure we’ll have to watch over her in case she gets too drunk.”

“… right.”

“I’m going off to pick up the cake now, when you’re done getting ready, make sure Sukuna and Satoru aren’t fooling around too hard to make sure the decorations get done.”

Huh?

“Wait, but I thought we weren’t supposed to see until they were done.”

Suguru ruffles your hair. “That’s only for Aimi. You’re her older sister so you also have to make sure everything’s in place.”

“… sure, whatever. After you pick up the cake I need you to pick up the flowers I wanted.”

“What are they for again?”

“Me! Duh!” You hope your smile and cheery tone of voice gives off a more joking tone rather than bitchy.

“Okay, tone it down with the attitude, it’s not cute.” Suguru pulls away from you and heads towards the door.

Your heart drops but you fight your microexpressions from showing it. Your cheek muscles stretch in trying to keep up this strained smile when all you want to do is cry.

“Wait, you’ll still grab the flowers will you?”

“I don't know, text me the address you should’ve had them delivered or got them yesterday.”

“I know, I know.” You know you should have, but you didn’t on purpose. “Please Suguru? It’s my birthday, too.”

This will be the last one. The last time.

Suguru huffs, “Okay fine, I’ll grab them.”

“Yay!” You cheer, pulling yourself into Suguru’s side and wrapping your arms around his waist. He pats you on the shoulder and pulls away sooner than what you hoped for.

“Make sure to check on Satoru and Sukuna.”

“Right.”

You’ll do that right now. After you text Suguru the address you walk into the designated party room. It’s barren of everyone except Yuuji, Sukuna, and Satoru.

Satoru spares you a side glance while Sukuna settles on you with a glare that makes its point quite like staring into the pistil of a flower for too long. A particular unsettling sensation comes to you, pricking all over your skull and bringing your elbows closer to your body for warmth.

Before you get to them, Yuuji excuses himself and has enough politeness to give you a small wave before he fully heads out of sight.

They still haven’t looked at you.

“You guys are still deciding on how to decorate the place?”

Now they share a glance at one another. Sukuna wipes the tip of his tongue over his bottom lip, and Satoru is fixated at the blank wall.

“… I think the balloons would look good as an accent to the ribbons.”

Satoru hums as an afterthought to you. “It’s not enough.”

You shift your weight onto one foot. “I have flowers coming in, Suguru’s going to pick them up. When he comes you can use those as decoration.”

Sukuna blinks at you. Once, twice. “We won’t have enough time to consider where they would go after.”

“It’s just some flower garlands. It would be easy to—“

“They don’t have thorns do they?” Satoru inquires.

“No, they’re hanging—I also have some fairy lights. They can hang from the ceiling.”

“We won’t have enough time.”

You sigh through your nostrils and take a deep brea to quell the slowly burning flame in your chest. To emphasize the next words you fold your arms over your rib cage.

“The party starts in a few hours, Suguru will be here in an hour. There will be enough time to set up.” What’s there not to understand?

“Decorations aren’t all we have to do.” Sukuna scoffs, partly huffing through his nose and a disgusted sound coming from his throat.

“Until Suguru comes back you guys can be busy doing other things.”

“So you want us to do everything for you?” Satoru takes a good look at you now, unamused and less than happy.

“H-huh?” You’re so taken aback you take a step backwards and tilt your head. “I’m not asking for a lot. I know you guys are basically doing everything by yourself but I could ask the others to help you.”

“They’re busy with Aimi. She should have all her friends with her—in fact, I should be with her right now. She said she needed help with her makeup right? I know a lot about faces—“ Mid sentence Sukuna knocks Satoru on the back of his head. He keeps his head clamped over his hair and forces his head down.

“If Aimi wants flowers and fairy lights we’ll put flowers and fairy lights.” Sukuna clarifies, giving you that same stare.

“But I’m asking for them?”

“And?”

“It’s my birthday, too. You know that right?”

“Right. I forgot.”

“Me and Aimi are twins.”

“Could’ve fooled me, you both are as different as night and day.”

Oh.

That’s stupid. And right.

“How?” You challenge. You hope you don’t come off as bratty or arrogant but… however bratty or arrogant you act will only be a speck of how bad Aimi is at times.

Satoru loops up, nose tipped into the hair as his eyes settle on the crease of where the wall meets the ceiling. “Aimi has a personality more suitable for people…” he looks down at you, meeting eye to eye. “While…”

His gaze sets aside, looking away then fleeting back to you. “You’re okay with being by yourself!”

Satoru says it cheerily although it’s more… insulting than anything.

“He’s saying you’re personality is shit and Aimi’s more fun to be around.” Sukuna scoffs. “Can’t help it that nobody wants to be around you.”

Satoru snorts and huffs while he turns away. “He said it, I didn’t.”

“I can’t believe you’re the one saying that to me.” You frown, turning Sukuna’s way. The back of his head is faced towards you, he’s not even bothering to look you in the eye. “If it weren’t for my sister then nobody would tolerate you.”

You hope you’re masking your disappointment and sadness well enough. Hoping that whatever you say is coming off more logical and reasonable than a desperate whine of your pain.

“She’s right.” Satoru shrugs, now poking Sukuna in the bicep. “Aimi’s just too nice. There’s no way anyone else would want to be with a brute like you.”

Sukuna grits. “We have the same GPA, and you’re a business major.”

“And who helped you with the physics and anatomy assignment last semester? Me.”

“That doesn’t prove anything when all you do is color in the lines of a presentation.”

“That makes NO sense and obviously is a lie they tell you guys to make you feel superior. If I was a biochemistry major I’d be ruling over your—“

“Am I interrupting something?” Nanami’s holding a white gift wrapped box in one arm and his knuckles hover over the door frame. Still wearing those khaki slacks and blue casual collared shirt.

You don’t know what’s worse. The fact that the big three of your crushes are in the same room or that you know more than half of these gifts are for Aimi, and you’re bracing yourself for the worst birthday in your 21 years of life.

“Why are you late? I’m telling Suguru.” Satoru comes around to pull Nanami into the room.

The both of them walk past you, looking ahead at the decorations littering the space and with no acknowledgment to you. Satoru’s explaining the balloons and fairy lights, and in no way is he leaving room for your flower garlands you embarrassingly begged Suguru to pick up.

Now Nanami is here, perhaps he’ll be more responsible. A voice of logic.

You come up beside them, clearing your throat, hoping they’ll notice you. It’s Nanami that gives you a slight glance from the corner of his eye.

“We need to leave room for flower garlands.”

“Is that something Aimi wished for?” Nanami turns to Satoru, then you.

Before Satoru can even speak, you pop up with “it’s something I want.”

A muscle ticks in Nanami’s jaws. It travels to the crease of his temple then to his eyebrow.

“I understand…” is the only thing he says.

Nanami goes his own way after placing the presents down. This is done much to Satoru’s own dismay as he calls out claiming that he had to help; in a comical manner of which Nanami ignores. You’d almost find it fond of you weren’t simmering down the scent of something burning inside your ribcage.

You’d just have to wait it out. When Suguru comes back with the flower garlands they’ll have no choice but to listen to him when you tell them to hang it up

~*~

You swear everything is on fire or would be on fire if it were smeared in oil and Suguru had laser eyes.

When Suguru comes through the door he’s got his arm full of a tall white box with the three tier cake that the two of you wanted… although Aimi had the first pick of the color and the base decorating. You were happy enough to choose the color of the frosting and the decorations.

You expect to see something else, like a bag hooked around his elbow, or anything else.

Suguru doesn’t bother to acknowledge you when he passes through the frame, beelining towards the room and eyes scanning the area with such fervor contrasting from his usual nonchalance.

When he sets the cake down, that's when he turns around, his sights land onto you, face morphing into something that makes your stomach drop. Satoru, Sukuna, and Nanami nowhere in sight.

“Where are Sukuna and Satoru? I thought Nanami was supposed to come in.”

“They went to Aimi’s room.”

“And you let them?!” Suguru’s voice is more charged than you’d ever heard from him before. Not only is he going to be angry at you but you can feel that you’re going to be scolded later for letting three boys interested in Aimi anywhere near her.

“Aimi’s grown up, and she still has Nobara and the others. It’s not like she’s alone.”

Unlike you.

“Why aren’t the decorations done? I trusted you to look after it.”

You nearly wince. “I wanted to wait so we could have room for my flower garlands.” Your eyes wash over his expression before traveling down to the floor.

“Flowers?”

“Yes, the flowers you were supposed to pick up for me.”

It slowly dawns onto him, eyebrows raising and irises gaining more clarity.

“Oh…” he holds a hand over his mouth. “I was in a rush, the cake was late and I…”

You try not to let it show but you can’t help but let your facade falter just slightly. Something Suguru doesn’t bother to address but walks past, he pats you on the shoulder.

“I’ll make it up to you later. I’m going to get those three back down here to finish up the decorations before we begin the cake. Go ahead and finish getting ready.” He doesn’t even wait for your response.

You’re finding your eyes becoming dry, something prickling and then the welling of liquid pooling in the inner and outer corners.

You use the back of your hand to wipe away the wetness staining your eyes. You’re afraid that it’ll wash away the hard work you’ve done for your makeup and that if you let one tear fall… the rest would be like a broken dam.

~*~

You don’t really compute further than that. You actually go upstairs to finish your hair after sitting and staring at the blank wall for ten minutes. Thinking about everything and nothing; Suguru forgot your flowers, Satoru’s mean words, Sukuna’s blatant dismissal, Nanami ignoring you and his lack of gift for you.

You’re bracing for the fact that you might have no gifts at the table at all. Maybe an envelope.

When you step down the stairs everyone is already there, Nobara gushing with Aimi about her dress or the decorations, whatever it is, they’re excited about it. Shoko and Utahime (your older brother and Satoru’s friends) are here, sharing a glass of punch sparked with some alcohol that you know Suguru ordered off hand.

When your feet reach the main floor level, it’s only Utahime and Shoko that come to greet you with warm smiles.

“Happy birthday. You’ve grown up so much from when I last saw you.” Shoko gives her words to you, tipping the glass to you before taking a sip.

Utahime rubs your shoulder before taking her hand away just as quickly as she placed it. “I hope you’re having a good party. It looks amazing, you and Aimi did a good job.”

You return the words with a half hearted smile, you really hope it doesn’t come off uncanny to the both of them, as these two have been the nicest to you of all Suguru’s friends (he only has a couple). But you can’t bring yourself to lie any longer. The point is to get through the night so you can hide and have a mental breakdown later.

“Thanks, Aimi picked them all. I just agreed to whatever she said.” The only thing you wanted were the flower garlands and fairy lights. You have none.

“Really?” Utahime follows your linear line of conversation. “She’s really talented then. I’ve seen some of the videos Suguru’s taken of her ballet.”

Here we go again.

You maintain that smile. “Yeah! She really is.” She can do it all. Play games, dance, write, draw, capture the love and affection of everything around her.

Where were Suguru’s videos for you when you played the piano?

“How are you doing?” It’s Shoko that catches your attention. “Are you looking forward to anything now that you’re 21?”

Are you?

You’re just going to be in Aimi’s shadow.

Maybe it’s time to move on…

“I’d like to keep playing the piano.” It’s the only thing you say. Your piano hasn’t been touched since six months ago or so, and it’s collecting dust in the other room.

“I didn’t know you played the piano.” Utahime mentions, just to say something. She looks a bit in awe, whether in genuine surprise or appreciation.

“It’s fine. Not a lot of people outside the family know about it. If Suguru doesn’t talk about it then how would you know?” You remark as cheerily as possible, tone kept bright, although the smile on your face is becoming awkward it shifts all the more disheartened by the moment.

Of course Utahime would know about Aimi’s ballet dancing but now about your piano hobby.

You notice it despite how Shoko attempts to hide it, but she sends Utahime a particular look, eyes shifting back from her to you.

Utahime only catches it when you’re both now staring at her.

She laughs awkwardly. “I’ll ask Suguru to show me some videos next time. I would love to see you play.”

If Suguru had any videos. He probably only had a couple of when you were 11, but very often your parents made him skip your piano lessons or recitals because they overlapped with Aimi’s. And being good at ballet was much more impressive than being good at piano.

“Everyone listen up!” Satoru’s voice drags the attention of everyone in the room.

“Satoru!” It’s Aimi’s chiding voice, her tiny hands reaching over to tug lightly at his shirt that rests against his well sculpted chests. “Get down!”

“I wanted to show off a little thing I had made for the twins.”

Twins?

As in Aimi AND you? Not just Aimi?

You can’t hide the subtle brightening of your mood. Even if you’re bracing yourself for disappointment of the bare minimum.

What Satoru pulls up is a slideshow of all the heartfelt memories he had captured over the year on his phone/camera. Just as you expected. The majority is memories of Aimi and Suguru together. When they went to Okinawa when they were 18 and Aimi tagged along. When they went to a cat cafe, Aimi held a kitten that had just scratched Satoru. Even one of just the two of them play fighting in the pool.

Oh look, there’s an obligatory photo with you in there and Aimi. It’s not even a photo Satoru took but one you know your parents did a long time ago that Suguru pulled up for the sake of having a photo of you.

This slideshow is a plain humiliation ritual to disclose to everyone about how much of an unloved loser you are to people within your own family.

You’re too ashamed to meet Shoko and Utahime’s eyes. You’re afraid you may find them pitying you beyond what you’re able to handle right now.

The slideshow is just Aimi featuring you. Hell, Suguru and Satoru have more cameos of each other in there than you do. All the photos you’re in just have Aimi in them! The only consistent thing about this slideshow is just Aimi!

A few photos passing by rile up a few people, Nobara, Yuuji, Panda and Inumaki specifically who all jump around Aimi and fool around with her.

It takes Suguru having to drag everyone’s attention away onto the next birthday event of the night. Cake cutting.

Aimi and you stand side by side while Suguru stands on the other side with the cake cutting knife and a few plates. The entire time it’s been covered by the white box.

But the flavor and decorations (the color, and toppings) are what you’ve been preparing and looking forward to the whole night. These are truly one of the only things you had part of in choosing.

You’ve imagined this since last year, a beautifully intricate mainly pink body with black smeared and blended at some points for color variations. Then black frosting borders the cake with pink edible gems lining the sides.

You’ve imagined it in the sketch you sent to the baker and decorator.

Suguru unveils the cake, pulling it off from overhead and it’s completely different from what you and Aimi discussed.

It’s mainly pink, yeah, but the frosting is white and instead of the edible gems it’s white and light blue flowers. The only remnants you’ve added that were kept are the black smears.

The first thing that crosses your mind is ‘Is Aimi sad about this? How can I make it better?’ But when you angle your face to hers, she’s joined her hands together. Her face is scrunched up in absolute glee and from where you’re standing the candles being lit seem to go in slow motion lighting over the corner of her lips crinkling upwards and the apple of her cheeks popping while her eyes glitter at the sight.

Then another thought betrays you, ‘did Aimi plan this?’

Even Suguru stuttered at the stark difference. He was there when you both talked to the caterer, he made sure you both (Aimi really) got what you wanted.

How could she have done this? Not as in how could she think this, or how could she do this behind your back, her very own twin sister. But literally how? You guys put in this order a month ago when there was no more time for changes, how?

And yeah, you guess how could she do this to you is also another big question to ask.

For a moment you debate turning over to her and slapping her, screaming in her face, roving your fingers through her tightly wound updo that no doubt Nobara and Maki worked so hard to get right to her vision.

You do have to stop yourself, not because you care about her and don’t want to (though that’s at least a quarter part of it), but because Suguru’s standing the closest to her. You know if you tried anything physical he’d stop you right away.

Instead, once all the candles are lit and the two of you are pushed closer together with no one else to help Aimi, you grab a handful of the cake between your fingers; not caring if the sweet frosting wedges between your nails. Then you shove it in her face, some pieces of the cake’s interior sliding down your hands before it can reach her.

There’s multiple gasps around you.

Aimi takes a moment to digest it in. Her eyes flickering from the cake, to you, and to the others, right before they set back onto you. Her expression drops and she whines out her name in a way that has your heart clenching in a way almost guilty for her.

Strong, thick, and long fingers grip around your shoulder, finger pads digging into the flesh under your collarbone and tugging you backwards. Within your heels you almost stumble onto your behind but manage to balance yourself on the long table on your right.

You feel someone pushing you on the other side, forcefully jabbing your hip into the table. You almost yell at them but it’s only Nobara rushing to her friend’s aid.

In a glimpse, within space, everyone’s crowding around her. Suguru first, then Sukuna, Nobara, Maki, if there’s space everyone would be crowding around her. Even Satoru has fought his way to her side, Nanami trailing behind him.

“Why would you do that?” Suguru hisses at you, grabbing your hand guilty of the act, smeared in the bitter sweet taste of your raspberry-strawberry chocolate mixture of shame.

You could say it. ‘O-oh, I didn’t mean to—is Aimi okay?’ But you don’t have the energy to muster up a false narrative.

“Who grabbed me.”

“What?” Suguru takes a step back, expression twisted from harsh anger to awe.

“Who grabbed me?!” You whip your head around, looking for a guilty face.

It couldn’t have been Nobara, she pushed you not grabbed. So who grabbed you? You can still feel the stinging below your collarbone.

“So what?” Sukuna’s voice pitches in. Of course it was him. “You don’t do that to your sister, dipshit.”

“Sukuna, shut up.” Suguru exhales, looking away from you to give him a particular expression you can’t bother looking further into. Right before he returns back down to you.

“Why'd you do it? I thought we agreed to not do those things. Aimi said she didn’t want that.” He’s talking to you like a child now.

‘I didn’t mean to, I just wanted to have fun’ All fine things you can say in rebuttal but you’re tired.

“She changed the cake.”

Not even a big change was done. You shouldn’t even be mad…

“Huh?”

“All of this, over a cake?” His expression twists.

… but seeing her so happy, made you bitter.

“Aren’t you older?” He criticizes.

Suguru’s tone softens, the harsh grip he holds around your wrist softens and your arm falls back down to your side in an almost reckless slap. “You need to grow up.”

“It’s always I need to be better. I need to grow up. I'm the older one.” You spat. “I’m only ten minutes older, it’s not like I’m as old as you.”

This party isn’t even for you anymore. No choice in decorations, flowers and fairy lights forgotten, and the one thing you had a part of anymore—just stolen from you without you knowing.

“How could you have done that without telling or consulting me, Aimi?” You’re being pulled away by Suguru. “It’s MY birthday too!” You’re screaming now, attempting to jump out of your brother's arms.

Aimi doesn’t bother to look at you, she’s too busy wiping away the cake from her face and crying to Nobara about her hair, eyeshadow and foundation.

Suguru practically shoves you into your room, with him standing at the door frame, afraid as if you’ll try to escape. “I’m very disappointed in you… I don’t understand why you’d do something like this.”

“Don’t start acting like my big brother now.”

“What?” This one sounds different, he sounds injured. “You’re just being mean to hurt me. Shit move. You’re staying here until the birthday’s over. We’ll talk in the morning.”

“I don’t give a fuck.”

Suguru’s nose scrunches and eyebrows furrow at your choice of words. “Don’t swear—“

“Get them out of here. Go celebrate Aimi somewhere else.”

“This isn’t your house, it’s unfair to say that.”

“When mom and dad are gone, it’s our house, and I say I want everyone gone.”

“You’re just being—“

“Suguru, dude,” Satoru seems to come from the shadows, appearing from nowhere. You almost flinch from the sudden change but find yourself more alerted about what he could think of you now.

You shouldn’t care, you weren’t even in most of those slides. It’s very clear he doesn’t care about you.

“We can have it at my place. Aimi won’t mind, it’s the second place she considered for her birthday.”

HER birthday. You didn’t know about this, and it’s very clear why.

“Right, thanks bro.” Suguru gives Satoru a fist pump before he leaves. You don’t miss the subtle glare Satoru sends toward you.

It pangs your heart, not like it matters anymore.

“Happy now? You’ll be here all alone if we have the party at Satoru’s.”

None of these people care about you, or even know you. They’re all either friends of Aimi; people who were your friends and like Aimi more (only Nanami fits this bill); or people who Suguru are friends with people that favor Aimi.

It won’t matter if you’re alone for this birthday.

It’ll be the same anyway. With or without.

“Now you’re not talking?” Suguru calls your name. Once. Twice. A third. And with the fourth he’s tugging on your shoulder that Sukuna’s gripped at so harshly that you feel the ache and bruises start to form.

You whip around, “Don’t touch me! Just fucking go. Go watch over Aimi. It’s all you’re ever good for.”

Suguru’s brows furrow further, his lips pressing tightly together while you can feel his eyes stare into your back. You’re trying not to shake, to show him the vulnerability you’ve been trying to hide this entire time. The shame of being unwanted and the hurt of being alone.

“We’ll be back tomorrow.”

With that, Suguru slams your door shut on you. This one you do flinch at.

After a few moments of just staring at the carpet, recounting your actions and the words of others. You jump onto the bed and burrow yourself into the pillow. You don’t care if your makeup gets on the fabric, you don’t care if your hair spray messes up the sheets or if your hair wakes up in a bird’s nest tomorrow. You just want to sleep.

You can’t keep doing this.

Your life is in a constant cycle of misery. Watching Aimi receive all the love that you’ve ever wanted and friends that cherish her with three or more guys being at her beck and all. You could care less about Sukuna now but Nanami and Satoru? You were Nanami’s friend first and Satoru at least should have cared for you some bit, being this known since childhood.

But it’s not like you were as important to him as Aimi and Suguru.

You make a choice. You take out your phone from the bedside table and look for new places to live. A quaint spot far away from the mansion and somewhere familiar enough where you can rely on walking for food and entertainment.

Though as you're looking, you can’t help but wonder if you were ever once truly cared for at all. Not by the friends or family-friends of the group, but by your own siblings.

~*~

That still doesn’t explain how you’ve managed to make Satoru, Nanami, and Sukuna change their minds about you… yet it does. Merely since these past three months, Sukuna has come for your help, Nanami has come to apologize, and Satoru has come to annoy you.

You don’t even know where to begin, well, you suppose you can begin with the first person that laid foot on the doorstep of your mansion.

Nanami Kento, your old classmate, now acquaintance. Barely friend… considerably someone you used to admire romantically.

He was the first one to apologize to you. Before your brother, before your sister, and before Satoru and Sukuna. All four who have known you longer.

It happened two weeks after the fiasco, before you moved into your duplex.

You’re standing at the entry of the door frame, Nanami standing awkwardly outside, looking out of place in his slacks and short sleeved ironed shirt. You’re a little embarrassed to be in nothing but shorts and a tank top that frames your shoulders a little too well.

“Aimi’s not here.”

“I am not here for Aimi.”

“Ah, then Suguru’s not home right now either.”

The both of them are bowling with Satoru.

“No, I wished to speak with you.”

You tilt your head. Now why would he do that?

“Why?”

“I wanted to apologize.”

“For what?”

“For not realizing…” Nanami stops in his tracks. “I saw the way your brother treated you, the celebratory slideshow Gojo put on, and the cake.”

Your eye twitches, your whole body stamped to the ground to prevent yourself from jumping away at the reminder.

“Nanami—“

“Kento, please refer to me as Kento.”

“Nanami.” You repeat, firmly. “I appreciate the sentiment, but what does this have to do with you? You could recognize these things and leave them alone.”

Leave you alone…

“Because I wish to be on your side.”

Huh?

“It’s not until after your… my refusal on your heartfelt confession that I realized my time with you was priceless.” Nanami runs his hands through his hair. Now that you notice it, it’s more unruly and rustled up. Like he’s been repeatedly brushing his fingers through it. “I wish to rekindle our friendship. If that’s an emotion you share with me.”

“Nanami,” you place a hand forward, hopefully blocking him slightly from you. Be friends? Again?

“Nanami, if this is out of pity, you don’t need to. I’m over it, I’m done.” You shake your head. You can’t believe this is something that’s been happening.

Nanami Kento? The Nanami Kento basically appearing at your doorstep and wishing you well and even wanting to be your friend again?

“You can move on now, too.” It seems like adding that part might’ve been worse because his light colored brows seem to furrow even deeper. The wrinkles in his too young face crease ever more against the backdrop of light emitting behind him. All it does is increase the dark shadows on his face.

“Why do you look like that?” The words fall out faster than you mean them to. It’s unruly, unrefined, and downright rude. It’s something you wouldn’t dare say to Nanami in the past.

You mean it sincerely and genuinely… not in a rude way. Nanami seems to read the panic in your eyes because his lower lip drops and he eases out with a soft swallow, “I’m disappointed that our circumstances have led this way.”

And whose fault is that?

You let out a small sigh, nothing too serious, just relief. “Look Nanami, I'm preoccupied today.” And the next year if it means he’ll leave you alone. “I think you need some time to think about this, I’m appreciative of the thought but I’d like to move.”

“Could I still visit?”

Huh?

“Like old times?” He clarifies.

What part of moving on does he not understand?

Nanami continues, reading the confusion and utterance of borderline rejection on your face. “It would be nothing to burden you, I wish to share recipes of meals with you. I won’t step into your home, I’ll simply leave the food outside and be on my way.”

“Will you be on your way if I say no?”

He hesitates then. His body tilting in adjustments to the weight he pushes on his hips. “I’ll consider an alternative way to—“

“No, this is fine.” Your sigh is heavier, relenting. You pinch your fingers between your nose bridge.

You doubt Nanami will come too often, instead he’ll just drop free food at your doorstep and move on his merry way. Eventually you’ll stop getting free food because he’s moved on and you’ll both be better off.

You finalize it. “You’re fine to send me food here and there if you want to.”

That seems to brighten up Nanami’s day. Seeming as his honeyed eyes look as if they’re glittering and glowing in the halo of the afternoon light shining behind him. Even the wrinkles on his face smoothen out and the dark cast shadows fade away into the ambient lighting.

He smiles, gentle and warm. “This is a chapter of a development of moving into your new home that you can look forward to.”

The words are nice, you nod in his way before you shut the door.

That won’t lead anywhere you’ll be hoping for, so don’t expect anything.

Maybe a month into living there, Suguru drops in mid-morning to afternoon. You’ve just bought a pool for the backyard and are setting it up DIY style, even going as far to integrate wooden poles in the corners of the property to make it as homey as possible. You see the vision now, add fairy lights, and get people to install an above ground patio and it’ll all be perfect… maybe a sunroom too.

You don’t notice him until he’s come to the side of the house and continues to stand there for however long.

“Do you need help with that?” And you nearly jump out of your skin and bones when his voice infiltrates the space. Jumpscare.

“What are you doing here?”

“I’m…” he looks around, obviously the wooden pillars need help being erected but also the connecting wood poles that would frame the four corners together. “Here to help.”

Despite how much you don’t want to see him, you admit you do want his help. Even if you can hire people, they won’t get the job done the way you want it. And you don’t want to end up sounding or looking bitchy to anyone.

After Suguru helps you with the most basic aspect of your dream backyard, he steps back besides you to oversee the progress. “It’s looking good.”

“Yes, I’m having a grand piano come in the next few days.” Though you lived in a mini mansion, the grand piano was always loud enough for Aimi to hear it. She said it always bothered her and contributed to her throbbing migraine level headaches.

“That’s nice.” He breathes out. A few beats pass before he adds, “When it comes, can I listen to you play?”

“Why?” You would’ve added something cruel and snide but you’re too tired to really make up something mean.

“Why wouldn’t I?” He tilts his head. “I know we haven’t talked or hung out for a while…”

If awhile means a month or several years for him, it isn’t up to you to decipher that.

“I’m actually busy right now, and will be for the next few…” you slow down on the next words to come.

“I can adjust to your schedule, whenever you’re free is when I’m free.”

“—years. I won’t be available for the next three years.”

Suguru pauses.

“So you’re telling me you have the next three years of your life planned out.”

“Yes.”

“So I won’t be able to hang out with you after you graduate?”

“No.” He would be too busy with Aimi anyway.

“Even if it’s just for an hour.”

“Time is money.”

“Wow, you’re dedicated, you really thought this through. What about relaxing? You ever plan on doing that or what?” Suguru folds his arms over his chest, looking down at you with an arched brow.

“I make sure to fit it into my schedule.” At this point you’re heading back inside through the sliding door, Suguru trailing behind you.

“Well then, don’t you have time for your big brother?”

So now he wants to be your big brother.

“… no, not anymore.”

He calls your name, ginger, something tender almost.

“I don’t know what made you move out, you can still have this place but please come back.” Suguru’s brows furrow deep into the crease of where his forehead meets his eyebrows. His lips sloped downwards in a sense of great discontent. “I won’t be able to be there if you need help.”

“There’s no difference.” You snap, almost instantly. “You were never there for me in the first place.”

Your arms come uncrossed, you throw them in the air for emphasis.

“It’s always Aimi first; Aimi this, Aimi that.”

Suguru’s arms then unfold from over his chest, he takes a step towards you, an arm hesitantly raised above his waist, seemingly reaching towards you. “I—“

“No.” You point a finger in his face. “You‘ve always put Aimi above me. Everyone has. It’s my whole life. This is the one place I’ll make it where she and nobody else associated with her will touch. It’s something for me, and me only.”

Suguru calls your name. “What do you mean? I—“ he stutters over his words. “I care about you, and Aimi does, too. Whatever we did, we’re sorry, we just—“

“Whatever you guys did?!” You balk. “You don’t even know!”

“I only know you started to fall apart because of the cake, but I don’t understand why.” Suguru lets out a short sigh, tipping his head back to rub his palm over his eyes. “I know Aimi changed the cake but…”

“But what? But she’s my little sister?”

“Yes!” He exclaims his response as if it solves everything. He perks back up, meeting your eyes. His are wide and explosive, almost as bright as Satoru’s when he’s made a discovery or exciting play of some sort.

“That’s the whole problem. You never let me have that chance, Aimi’s only 10 minutes younger. I exist, I’m your little sister, too.”

“But there must be…”

“No Suguru. When was the last time you ever let me have something of my own without having to give up something for Aimi?”

“But that’s just part of having siblings—“

“You don’t get it.” You stomp your foot. Your voice breaks and you feel like a child. It’s happening all over again. You try to fight for yourself and when things don’t go your way, you just end up crying. “I’m always the one having to sacrifice something. Aimi’s never had to compromise on something.”

“You forgot my flowers, they’re the only things I wanted for decoration. Nobody else cared about me when it came to something I wanted, or considered me when I asked for something—I never ask for anything!”

Suguru swallows, his eyes now lidded back to the way they usually are except with a different manner laced into the way his irises skitter around the room.

You want to stop, but you end up continuing your rant anyway. “Suguru, you don’t stop Satoru or Sukuna when they treat me like shit when it comes to Aimi. Satoru I understand, he doesn’t care about me, but wasn’t it strange to you how different of a relationship I have with him compared to you and Aimi?l

“Or Sukuna, you were too busy coddling Aimi to realize he pushed me to get to her! I had a bruise the shape of his finger prints from how hard he gripped my shoulder just to push me out of the way.”

“What? Sukuna did that?”

“Yes!”

“And how mom and dad never let you come to my recitals, only Aimi’s because ballet is so much harder than piano. What if I just wanted you to be there for me once?” Your eyes are getting dry.

“I-I get that,” Suguru clarifies, he’s given you your space to rant, and flail your hands and arms. “What did Satoru do?”

This one you’re more embarrassed about, you turn to the side. Finding your newly bought table more interesting and compelling. “It’s not his fault he doesn’t like me, our personalities don’t get along the same way yours and Aimi’s does…” your voice falls off slightly. This is another kind of subject, yeah Sukuna is mean but…

Satoru is no Sukuna, unlike Sukuna Satoru’s just dismissive—sometimes he’s mean—but most of the time he doesn’t really care about you enough to really talk or consider you as a companion or person. Even if you are Suguru and Aimi’s sibling.

“Ugh, but can’t he just be nicer about it?” You huff. “He’s not mean all the time but he’s so… dismissive.”

“Anytime I try to be cordial and or at least polite he’s always so disinterested and—“ it makes you feel unimportant. How stupid. “Didn’t you notice the slide show, Sugu?”

“Of course I did,” Suguru responds so easily, it’s like he doesn’t even realize how much that response would hurt you. He realized and he didn’t say anything?

He continues, “I know there weren’t as many photos of you on there, but… I thought you didn’t care.”

“How could I not? Any of the photos I was in, Aimi was always there. How could you not care? It would make sense if this was an Aimi only payrty but this is a birthday for me, too… it’s so disrespectful.”

Suguru sighs in emphasis, “You know Satoru’s disrespectful sometimes.”

“It doesn’t matter—wait, why are you even defending him?”

“No, it’s not like that.”

“Why wouldn’t you think I wouldn’t care?”

“You never came to me or told me about it.”

You’re screaming now. “You never noticed me! You never cared about what I wanted!

“Just,” your brother exhales. “Tell me what Sukuna did.”

“Why should I? Will you care? If Aimi told you he was just misunderstood, would you believe her and then chalk it up to nothing?”

“No. This time I’ll listen.”

You grit your teeth. “He’s just a mean bastard.” You don’t want to elaborate on all the ways he hurt you, and you don’t want to let Suguru know you have a crush on any of them! Especially considering how they’re all sweet on Aimi.

“Mean how?”

“Like you don’t know?”

Suguru rolls his eyes, “of course I know. I’m his friend.” Admittedly, Suguru has never seen Sukuna be mean to Aimi. “I need to know exactly.”

He needs to know exactly what so he can help you.

You stand in silence, eyes raking the hardwood flooring you make a mental note of adding a homey rug on. “He’s…” mean to you, but incredibly considerate to Aimi. He cares about the things she makes and he cares about her as a person. You’ve seen how people awe in how obedient he is with her, but when it comes to you, he considers you a nuisance.

You can’t blame him for favoring Aimi. If you had a person who loved and favored you that much you would fight that hard for them, too.

You can’t blame Sukuna if he doesn’t like you. Maybe you’re just not a lovable person.

“He’s what?” Suguru eggs on, tip toeing closer and angling his face down to catch your expression.

You turn away.

“Just go. I want to be alone.”

Suguru’s mouth gapes as if he wants to say more. He clearly wants to combat your words and concerns but all that goes to waste when he can see the discontent and frustration written in your furrowed brow and deep frown.

“Call me if you need me, really, I’ll be here as soon as possible.”

Suguru goes through the door with a small clasp while it closes shut and leaves you alone once again.