dionysus

"We may begin with the work entitled The Meadows of Gold written by the famous historian al-Mas'udi (d. AD 956). He was born in Baghdad and died in Cairo, having, in between, travelled widely in Persia and India in addition to Iraq, Palestine and Syria. The Meadows of Gold contains a number of anecdotes related to food. One involves the Abbasid Caliph, Harun al-Rashid (d. AD 809), of 1001 Arabian Nights fame. He was invited to dine by his brother Ibrahim b. al-Mahdi (d. AD 853), a noted poet and culinary expert, of whom more later.

Harun was served a dish of what appeared to be small and delicate slices of fish arranged in the shape of a fish. When informed that the dish was made from more than 150 fish tongues, the Caliph demanded to know its price and commanded that an equivalent of 1000 silver dirhams be distributed to the poor. This was in expiation, he said, for his brother's wastefulness. Moreover, he ordered a servant to take the fish on its plate, itself an expensive item worth five times as much as the fish preparation, and give it to the first beggar he met in the street.

A second anecdote involves another Caliph, al-Mutawakkil (d. AD 861), who was relaxing one day with his courtiers and singers beside one of the many canals that traversed Baghdad. He smelled the aroma of cooking drifting from a pot being prepared by a sailor on his boat. The Caliph ordered the pot - a beef sikbaj, a sweet and sour stew dish, brought immediately to him. The Caliph sampled the stew with a piece of bread, as did his courtiers and singers, until the pot was empty. He then ordered the pot filled with 2000 dirhams and returned to the boat; the coins that did not fit into the pot were placed in a pouch and given directly to the cook. In the Caliph's judgement the dish was the best sikbaj he had ever tasted."

I noted in a previous post that I'd "expand on my thinking on efforts to reproduce period food and how we’re just never going to know if we have it right or not." Well, now I have 2am sleep?-never-heard-of-it insomnia, so let's go.

At the fundamental level, this is the idea that you can't step in the same river twice. You can put your foot down at the same point in space, and it'll go into water, but that's different water, and the bed of the river has inevitably changed, even a little, from the last time you did so.

Our ingredients have changed. This is not just because we can't get the fat from fat-tailed sheep in Ireland, or silphium at all anywhere, although both of those are true. But the aubergine you buy today is markedly different to the aubergine that was available even 40 years ago. You no longer need to salt aubergine slices and draw out the bitter fluids, which was necessary for pretty much all of the thing's existence before (except in those cultures that liked the bitter taste). The bitterness has been bred out of them. And the old bitter aubergine is gone. Possibly there are a few plants of it preserved in some archive garden, or a seed bank, or something, but I can't get to those.

We don't really have a good idea of the plant called worts in medieval English recipes. I mean, we know (or we're fairly sure) it was brassica oleracea. But that one species has cultivars as distinct as cabbage, broccoli, cauliflower, kale, Brussels sprouts, collard greens, Savoy cabbage, kohlrabi, and gai lan (list swiped from Wikipedia). And even within "cabbage" or "kale", you have literally dozens of varieties. If you plant the seeds from a brassica, unless you've been moderately careful with pollination, you won't get the same plant as the seeds are from. You can crossbreed brassicas just by planting them near each other and letting them flower. And of course there is no way to determine what varietal any medieval village had, a very high likelihood that it was different to the village next door, and an exceedingly high chance that that varietal no longer exists. Further, it only ever existed for a few tens of years - before it went on cross-breeding into something different. So our access to medieval worts (or indeed, cabbage, kale, etc) is just non-existant.

Some other species within the brassica genus are as varied. Brassica rapa includes oilseed rape, field mustard, turnip, Chinese cabbage, and pak choi.

We have an off-chance, as it happens, of getting almost the same kind of apple as some medieval varieties, because apples can only be reproduced for orchard use by grafting, which is essentially cloning. Identification through paintings, DNA analysis, and archaeobotany sometimes let us pin down exactly which apple was there. But the conditions under which we grow those apples are probably not the same as the medieval orchard. Were they thinned? When were they harvested? How were they stored? And apples are pretty much the best case.

Medieval wheat was practically a different plant. It was far pickier about where it would grow, and frequently produced 2-4 grains per stalk. A really good year had 6-8. In modern conditions, any wheat variety with less than 30 grains per stalk would be considered a flop.

Meats are worse. Selective breeding in the last century has absolutely and completely changed every single species of livestock, and if you follow that back another five centuries, some of them would be almost unrecognisable. Even our heritage breeds are mostly only about 200 years old.

Cheese, well. Cheese is dependent on very specific bacteria, and there are plenty of conditions where the resulting cheese is different depending on whether it was stored at the back or front of the cave. Yogurts, quarks, skyrs, etc, are also live cultures, and almost certainly vary massively. (I have a theory about British cheese here, too, which I'll expand on in a future post)

So, even before you go near the different cooking conditions (wood, burnables like camel and cow dung, smoke, the material and condition of cooking pots), we just can't say with any reliability that the food we're making now is anything like medieval people produced from the same recipe. We can't even say that with much reliability over a century.

Under very controlled conditions, you could make an argument for very specific dishes. If you track down a wild mountain sheep in Afghanistan, and use water from a local spring, and salt from some local salt mine, then you can make a case that you can produce something fairly close to the original ma wa milh, the water-and-salt stew that forms the most basic dish in Arabic cookery. But once you start introducing domestic livestock, vegetables, or even water from newer wells, you're now adrift.

It is possible that some dishes taste exactly the same, by coincidence. But we can't determine that. We can't compare the taste of a dish from five years ago, let alone five hundred, because we're only just getting to a state where we can "record" a taste accurately. Otherwise it's memory and chance.

Regulus and Pandora, 2/5 of the Slytherin Skittles🥰

Suspense is one of the trickier parts of writing to manage effectively because, as the author, you can’t experience your story the way a reader does. If you don’t have enough suspense, it can be difficult to keep your readers interested. If you have too much, frustrated and stressed-out readers might throw your book against the wall. Too much suspense can even backfire - if you try to keep your readers constantly on edge, they can stop taking things seriously and the end result is as though you never included any suspense at all.

So how can you tell if you’ve reached the right balance? Unfortunately, I can’t answer that for you. Some things really do require feedback from honest and insightful readers. Once you have that feedback, however, there are easy tricks to adjusting the level of suspense without a drastic re-write. Here are my five favorite methods.

Promises and Payoffs

INCREASE SUSPENSE by promising something huge and then giving your reader something unexpected. To borrow an example from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, imagine a teenage boy and girl sneaking into an empty building. Everything from the costumes to the lighting is designed to make you uneasy about the girl’s safety but, in the end, she’s the vampire. Give the audience something sensational and they won’t be disappointed that you didn’t deliver on what you originally promised.

DECREASE SUSPENSE by promising less than you plan to deliver. For example, if you plan to kill off a character as they walk through a dark alley, let them worry about being mugged rather than murdered. Not only is it less suspenseful, the payoff is more shocking.

Characters are Crucial

INCREASE SUSPENSE by shifting the focus to a character who’s more involved in the action or one who has more at stake. Even if you have a single POV character, another can come in and demand that character’s attention, along with the readers’.

DECREASE SUSPENSE by focusing on a character who’s more concerned with a secondary goal. Subplots are a fantastic way to give your readers some room to breathe.

Calm vs. Chaos

INCREASE SUSPENSE by cutting back on the action. Suspense flourishes in the quiet moments when your characters have time to think and to anticipate what may be in store for them.

DECREASE SUSPENSE by giving your characters a big, exciting mess to deal with. Even when that mess causes more problems and puts more pressure on your characters in the long run, you’ve still created an oasis where both they and the readers are too distracted to worry about how the big picture will pan out.

Devil’s in the Details

INCREASE SUSPENSE by concentrating on the details of the setting. Horror movies are great at this - every creak of a door, every shadow across a wall keeps the audience immersed in the experience and tense with anticipation.

DECREASE SUSPENSE by breaking the “show, don’t tell” rule and allow exposition to help you move things along. You don’t need to take readers through every aspect of your story in excruciating detail. It’s okay to gloss over some things and it helps readers relax because they know you’re not going to be springing any surprises on them just yet.

Ticking Time-Bomb

INCREASE SUSPENSE by imposing a deadline that your characters struggle to meet. It’s one of the oldest and most obvious tricks in the book, but very effective.

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/ / Background / Lockscreen / /

──────⊱◈◈◈⊰────────────⊱◈◈◈⊰─────

➵ Jibaku shounen Hanako-kun

➵ Toilet-bound Hanako-kun

⊱ Hanako-kun

⊱ Nene Yashiro

⊱ Yugi Tsukasa

↳ match Hanako and Yashiro.

⟿ Author's Official Art

steve rogers: five year plan? you know who had a five year plan? stalin. look where he ended up.

tony stark: guys. emergency: my outfit isn’t dope enough today.

clint barton: [on a scooter] you’re driving? you fucking loser, i’m scooting!”

natasha romanoff: she’s complaning, meanwhile I was eating my 5th cricket.

bruce banner: where’s the fire extinguisher in this room? GOD do they not care about safety???

thor odinson: KYLE, BRO, ARE YOU SHITTING ME? I THOUGHT WE HAD A DATE? CMON, MAN.

loki odinson: here’s yet another situation in which being a chameleon would be useful.

sam wilson: I know you don’t like me, which is exactly why I asked the teacher to move my seat next to you.

scott lang: do you have any deodorant? or maybe some orange juice, either will work.

hope van dyne: anyone eating a mini candy cane looks like a pussy.

peter parker: hey, off topic question, are you more of a lewis or a clark kind of gal?

rhodey: we are not getting in a robotic argument. not today.

shuri udaku: I can’t see the math problem through my tears.

wanda maximoff: oh, I committed some sins early on, for sure.

valkyrie: if I were high, it wouldn’t be on weed. that’s weak.

t'challa udaku: that’s not how you eat pasta in these lands, you ignorant slut. 

stephen strange: shift your eyes to the wonders of my fingers.