you ever fuckin uhh...

all-women productions of shakespeare plays are so enlightened not for necessarily any feminist reason i just really like it when women kiss and duel each other to the death

rawrdogging the scene gf she squeeze the awesomesauce out of my smexicles

when you see a funny tiktok and think "maybe I should make a tiktok account" don't listen that's the devil talking

People talk about the surprise albums from people like Taylor Swift or Beyoncé that drop with zero warning but I have just been existing in this world where every album I've ever heard in my life has been a surprise album because I didn't know that musicians had schedules that we could see

Quick i need a gamer drink that isnt gamer girl bathwater or gamer fuel because i cant get either of those in canada

Rockstar, Monster, and Red Bull.

My dad paypals me 20 bucks every exam season "for red bull and snickers" because he swears by a trick he used to do in college where he would chug a red bull and eat a snickers in the exam hall before every single one of his exams and he did well on all of them. Legitimately swears to this day that it works and makes me do it. The first time i tried it i also knocked that exam out of the park. It would take 2 more years for either of us to figure out that we both had low blood pressure and what all that caffeine and sugar was making us experience was known as "normal blood pressure allowing us to concentrate better." My dad still swears that it was the red bull and snickers and not the medical equivalent of using the wrong equation and getting the right answer.

it’s so funny when youtubers/podcasts have a sponsorship and they introduce the company as if it’s this shiny new thing that hasn’t already been terrorizing me for years like shut up i already know that skillshare is an online learning community with thousands of classes for creative and curious people let’s keep it moving 

Elmo commits murder

Elmo off the shits

my boyfriend’s ass must be a german ambulance cuz he got that wagen and it makes me start kranken

oh mein gott i vant him so bad