welcome to my mr. mime

teaching a baby to talk via morshu youtube poops in an attempt to create a “morshu accent”

people think five likes isn't a lot but just imagine five tons of flax at your doorstep today

in charcuterie city, you'll always be cheesed to meet your friends

I hate charcuterie city I want to go somewhere else

this is all that's left.

this is all that's left.

a couple weeks ago this guy posted in the chicago pagan facebook group saying that he’s a djinn and that there’s a portal between here and egypt and only he and one other person had the power to close it and there was going to be a massive sandstorm… like dude, close the fucking portal, why are you even telling us this

youre making mommy want to smoke

are you gonna pick those penne noodles out of the boiling water one by one like a man, or are you gonna use a strainer like some kind of democrat?