I hate it when people ask me if I have a boyfriend!! There is no easy way to explain that I have six boyfriends but Iâm also single
$LAYYYTER

Kiana Khansmith

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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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@upstatesugar
I hate it when people ask me if I have a boyfriend!! There is no easy way to explain that I have six boyfriends but Iâm also single

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How to be a kept woman
Any woman who dares to suggest that itâs OK to live off a rich man is likely to be dismissed as a traitor by feminists. Yet this is exactly the lifestyle promoted in a new book by Abigail Bosanko. Though the novel is fictional, the author was âkeptâ by her husband, an investment fund manager, in an elegant Edinburgh mews house while she wrote it. Here, we present Abigailâs guide to becoming a kept woman⌠KNOW WHAT YOU WANT BEFORE you even contemplate being a kept woman, know what kind of man you want. If you want an art historian or collector who works for Sothebyâs, donât settle for a picture framer, even if he has a string of shops. Be confident - an intriguing 21st century woman with her own independent pursuits and talents. You want this man to fall in love with your beautiful mind. HAVE A SKILL Choose an unusual skill - this is intriguing and sexy. Play polo, or golf (not football - men see women who like football as spies in the camp); have an intimate knowledge of 18th and 19th century courtesans; play an instrument; learn about wine or speak an unusual language. Knowledge of food is always sensual. SPEND TIME ON YOURSELF This is something puritans disapprove of, but spending time on yourself - doing your nails, having a massage or a facial, or even just wearing your favourite perfume - is all good for your self-image and self esteem. UNDERWEAR Lingerie is psychologically revealing. If a woman is in a happy relationship she has all sorts of fabulous lingerie, but when sheâs unhappy sheâs got her 90-denier winter warmers, and fleecy vests, because sheâs not particularly interested in sharing that part of herself. Even if you feel like 90-denier, wear something silky that makes you feel good. CLOTHES Nurture your curves like actresses Kate Winslet, Catherine Zeta Jones and Marilyn Monroe. There is nothing wrong with being a size 14 - look at Nigella Lawson. Think Forties Domestic Goddess. Wear elegant, simple, well-cut clothes, such as shawl-collared suits which hug your curves, in neutral tones. And donât forget your heels. WHERE TO MEET The first-class lounge at the airport is perfect. Save up all your air miles and buy a club class seat to somewhere such as Paris or New York. Hope for a delay, then you will all get to know each other playing Scrabble, with endless free drinks. Fine art, furniture and jewellery auctions at the top auction houses are also perfect. WHAT KIND OF MAN? Obviously heâs got to be wealthy, but heâs also got to be discreet. Showy wealth is a definite no-no. Lots of gold jewellery shows someone who needs to be in a credit card club to feel financially confident. All a man needs is a beautiful watch, or a signet ring with the family crest. Find out where he has been on holiday. There are two types: if he has been scuba diving in the Maldives or white-water rafting in the Amazon, this shows he has money and a sense of adventure. Alternatively, cushy stays in sumptuous hotels are perfect. If he hasnât had time for a holiday, heâs too busy to appreciate you. HIS PERSONALITY He should have an active hobby - one that shows stamina, which is vital. He should be generous, of course, and protective of you. He should be well-read and informed, reading at least one newspaper in addition to the FT. Books could be things such as Martin Amisâs Experience, or J. M. Coetzeeâs Waiting For The Barbarians. DROPPING HINTS In our modern world where women are career- queens, men find this concept odd. One male friend of Abigail asked: âWhy would an intellectual woman want to be bank-rolled?â But when it was explained that it would allow her to follow her vocation, the concept became quite appealing. Start by saying that you would love to be able to pursue your passion as a rare book restorer/ cartoonist/script writer, but canât afford to. Heâll be impressed and will offer to pay. HOW DO YOU KNOW HE WILL KEEP YOU? The first sign is when he offers to pay off your overdraft, then credit card bills, then suggests you donât go in to work but spend time with him. While heâs at a business lunch he would love it if you went shopping - he will pick up the tab, of course. When it comes to this sort of arrangement, you have got to be honest, clever and sophisticated. TERMS Be bold, be daring, be honest. You need a joint bank account - you set the limit - plus your own personal savings account. He can buy you a chic mews house, a penthouse flat - or, of course, you can move into his mansion. Ask for accounts at your favourite shops. You also need treats such as manicures, pedicures, chocolates and flowers. Exotic holidays and weekend breaks are essential. SEX This is sensual, loving, tantalising sex, not you fulfilling his fantasy - not unless the fantasy is mutual. When it comes to sex, remember, curiosity comes first. With all the money you now have access to, you can change the venue as often as you like. Instead of going home, book into a five-star hotel. It will never get boring. GIFTS You should ask for gifts that are original: âA friend received an embroidered silk cheongsam (Mandarin gown) from her lover who was travelling in China.â Expect a single, beautiful pearl, elegant jewellery, a race-horse, ÂŁ1,000 worth of Lottery tickets or rare books such as the original Les Liaisons Dangereuses. HOLIDAYS At least four times a year, not counting short breaks. Abigailâs husband often takes her to a romantic hotel near the Sorbonne in Paris. Think skiing in Aspen, scuba diving on the Barrier Reef, a trip to the Galapagos or Madagascar, sunbathing in St Lucia. He might have his own private yacht, so cruise the Caribbean or the islands in the Mediterranean. WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR TIME Write that novel thatâs said to lurk inside us all - Abigail wrote hers; finish your art history degree. Get to know the best restaurants and cafes so you can lunch at length with your friends. Afternoons-should be reserved for shopping or pampering, and evenings with him. WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR (HIS) MONEY It goes without saying that you will revamp your wardrobe. Keep champagne, chablis, caviar, organic bread, bacon and quailsâ eggs in your fridge. A bit of philanthropy is essential, too, so set up covenants to your favourite charities and feel charitable towards bone fide beggars - give more to buskers and pavement artists, because they are at least trying. Send your family on their dream holiday, and treat your man to a surprise trip on Concorde or the best seats at a major international sporting event. WHAT TO SAY TO CRITICS Always keep a bottle of champagne in the fridge for your disapproving female friends. They will be extremely envious, so kill them with kindness. Never apologise about your chosen lifestyle. Donât brag about it either - itâs not dignified. END IT You can insist on an expiry date - a year and a day maybe - but you decide when. Do not return your gifts. When it ends, put all your overflow cash into an ISA and go on holiday for a month. Go somewhere romantic and beautiful, and take time to think. You never know, he might follow you there and beg to keep you in a permanent arrangement. Lazy Ways To Make A Living by Abigail Bosanko, Time Warner Books, ÂŁ5.99.
Read this sis
A BEAR MADE FROM ROSESÂ đđđ
Found this company the other day on Facebook. According to their site, each Rose Bear is made by hand and takes almost an entire day to complete. Thereâs no denying that if someone got me this for Valentineâs Day, Iâd love them forever! â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
Check them out HERE
In case you needed a reminder that these men are trash, my sugar daddy fucked me(several times) on his wifes birthday
..and what does that make you?
Paid
Clapback season

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@phantomjewels
â¤ď¸
đsandratalundzichđ
Hard vibes
How do you use yelp freestyle?
Iâm sure yâall already use Yelp to determine the best spots around you. You look at pictures that reviewers have already posted, right? Click on those reviewers, especially if itâs for upscale places.
Keep reading
Iâm tryna pole like this đ

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The only careers Iâm interested in are handsome artistâs muse, worshipped goddess, burlesque queen, or mafia princess
Christian Louboutin Masterpost
âPeople say I am the king of painful shoes. I donât want to create painful shoes, but it is not my job to create something comfortable. I try to make high heels as comfortable as they can be, but my priority is design, beauty and sexiness. Iâm not against them, but comfort is not my focus.â
The only man who has every really been honest about the extent of his downfall. This post is an update of an old post. Now, for some reason I picture Louboutins being every SBâs first go to pair of designer shoes. Why? Because they are sexy, gorgeous and the bottoms make any man want to bow down. That being said, they are the MOST painful pair of heels I have ever owned. So every little step to stretch/protect them has been worth it.Â
How to Make Heels More Comfortable As he said, louboutinâs will never be comfortable heels - they are not supposed to be. But, here are some tips and tricks you can use to make them a little less uncomfortable. Before we start, I have the So Kate that I wear to functions/dinners/events aka events where I can sit for long periods of time without looking out of place. 1. If your pair has a narrow front, you will need to stretch the leather. If you want to be a badass, then you can stuff your feet in and walk around for hours and eventually make them form - you will hate yourself. OR, you can use the extra help. Double up on some socks, stuff your feet in and shift all of your weight to the front of your feet. Using your blow dryer, apply high heat directly to the shoe. Make sure to relocate weight to the front of the shoe, the back will stretch as well! IF it stretches too much (thatâs okay), then use fashion tape on the back to prevent sliding of your foot. I think it is better to stretch too much then not as all and with the tape, youâll never notice the difference.Â
2. Beauty is pain ladies and these epitomize both. Bandage your third and fourth toes with some medical tape, removes pressure from the nerves. Youâll hold out longer.
3. INSOLES for these brand of heels are a MUST. I didnât realize how much of a difference they made until I did not wear them. HUGE HUGE HUGE difference.
4. When you are walking, be aware of your posture. If youâre an SB then your posture should always been good, in or out of heels. That being said, in these heels relocating your weight to your heel with an erect back makes it less painful. If youâre not used to this then this would feel awkward but youâll get used to it - I promise.Â
How to Protect Your Red BottomsÂ
Yes, I like saving money. However, I chose not to go to the cobbler because they wanted to charge me 70 for the base. And, they would not have been able to protect my babies in time. You can do this for under $12, without any damage to the red after.Â
Buy the ZAGG InvisibleShield Military Grade Screen Protector (I recommend this brand only because itâs the only one I know that will NOT damage the red.)Â Â
You will want to buy the OG iPad case just in case you mess up, you can do it more than once. OK, so what you will do is clean the bottom of your shoes with a damp cloth and then outline them on the non-sticky part of the protector. DO NOT ACCIDENTALLY BUY THE GLASS PROTECTOR. Now, it is arts and craft time and you will cut out the base the outline of your shoes. Peel the plastic away, spray spray spray your shoes with the provided solution and slowly apply the sticky face, while being aware of air bubbles. You will want to use your windshield wiper thing to remove as many of the air bubbles as possible.
These are my protected So Kate that I have worn so many times and they still look perfect. It may have costed me more time but saved me a little bit of cash money. DISCLAIMER: If you are walking on floors in a kitchen/restaurant that could be greasy then you will want to be EXTRA careful. When you scruff the bottom, you get the real grip of these shoes. But when the bottom has the protector on then there is a little less traction.Â
I want my future man to have this kind of energy
Biiihhhh! Where!!? Where is he?!
đŠđŠđŠ God if youâre listening
O love how they all look in their purse and shake their heads like uh uh this wonât do
WOAH WHERE THEY AT DAMN
Iâm definitely willing to do this but hereâs the catch, I better NEVA be skressedtâŚ.
Let me double down on this.
Iâll 14 cent ya ass all day long.
Thatâs why the pink bills are 1,000 yuan billsâŚ. you really thought you did something there huh đ
So letâs say the average stack that we see is about 20 bills
144.13 x 20 = $2,882.6 USD
And y'all wonder why you cant find real love lmaooo
Why? Because we donât wanna date broke ass men???
Nigga please
Nigga you think weâre worried about âreal loveâ ??? Lmfaoooooo not in this economy. Run them pockets nigga đđđ
Why do you not like cash? I thought that was better.
I donât have to explain anything to anyone if Iâm at the airport and I have an Amex Business card with more than $10k on it. However, I will have a LOT to explain if Iâm carrying more than $10k in cash on my person. On top of that, we all know the cash depositing laws for personal accounts, and how they watch closely for structuring. In my LLC, I have listed myself as an employee and I get paid from my heaux money twice a month directly to whatever account I choose. So to the bank, I have a legit business that I regularly get paid from and pay expenses for. It also happens to receive large deposits from clients. If I wanted to deposit a large amount of cold hard cash into it, I can. No flags raised as long as I pay my taxes. It matches the par for the account and the business. If I had a lot of cold hard cash that I wanted to deposit in a plain personal account where deposits beforehand (outside of verifiable job incomes) have never been more than 2k, Iâd get flagged.
I donât like keeping cash because it is so easy for anyone to relieve you of it, I spend too fast (and my money app wonât automatically keep track of my cash purchases), in an event of a fire in my condo my money would be gone (unless I had some sort of a fireproof safe, which requires room in my condo that I donât have), and it gets bothersome calculating amounts of money to go in this account and that account and whatever every month. Also, if my main income is all in cash, what do I do when I need to make a large purchase that must take a chunk out of my cash? I canât just show up with bands lmao. I would need to write a check, meaning I need to have some semblance of a bank account, and to have a bank account, I need my LLC (and my DBA) to prove I have some semblance of a business so the amount of money isnât flagged or questioned, andâŚyou see where Iâm going with it?
Cash is fine if you have under 50k of it. If you have more than 50k, simply keeping it all in cash is not a smart move imo, for all of these reasons. By the way, if you have bands of cash sitting at home, you know what itâs not doing? MULTIPLYING. 50k lying in a safe is 50k. 50k in a bank account with high interest rates can be 55k after a year. Cold hard cash is not investable, available to collect interest, or flippable. You should consider at the very least finding a way to clean the money so that the cash has become legal. (Before I get asked how to clean money, hereâs an example. Say you wanted to clean money by purchasing several Rolex watches in cold hard cash. You later return them and ask it to be put on your card. Thatâs now legit money that the bank will not flag, because they can note that it came from Rolex, and that it was not from a deposit of your own volition. The bank only flags deposits youâve made in cash and wire transfers from âsuspiciousâ accounts, not from well-known institutions like Rolex. There is no proof required to confirm that you bought the Rolex in the first place (couldâve been a gift) to your bank, so there will be no questions asked there.)

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Spoiled Gf Tip:
Tired of Saying Mutually Beneficial?
Say youâre a traditionalist. Say you want a man to be the man in the relationship - the breadwinner, the provider.
In return youâre the loving, caring, beautiful, and all-around perfect woman. Youâll care for him, love him, and always be there. But for to you always be there, to always look beautiful, and be all-around perfect your man needs to provide for you - financially, emotionally, and of course physically (đđđ).
Instead of demanding something mutually beneficial, demand A MAN. Watch how the tables turn when heâs forced to either comply or admit heâs not a man whoâs capableâŚâŚ And nothing hurts a manâs ego, pride, or manhood more đ
Literally what I say even if itâs to a guy off SA who knows itâs mutually beneficial.
24 Invaluable Skills To Learn For Free Online This Year
Hereâs an easy resolution: This stuff is all free as long as you have access to a computer, and the skills you learn will be invaluable in your career, and/or life in general.Â
1. Become awesome at Excel.
Chandoo is one of many gracious Excel experts who wants to share their knowledge with the world. Excel excellence is one of those skills that will improve your chances of getting a good job instantly, and it will continue to prove invaluable over the course of your career. What are you waiting for?
2. Learn how to code.
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Perhaps no other skill you can learn for free online has as much potential to lead to a lucrative career. Want to build a site for your startup? Want to build the next big app? Want to get hired at a place like BuzzFeed? You should learn to code. There are a lot of places that offer free or cheap online coding tutorials, but I recommend Code Academy for their breadth and innovative program. If you want to try a more traditional route, Harvard offers its excellent Introduction to Computer Science course online for free.
3. Make a dynamic website.
You could use a pre-existing template or blogging service, or you could learn Ruby on Rails and probably change your life forever. Hereâs an extremely helpful long list of free Ruby learning tools that includes everything from Rails for Zombies to Learn Ruby The Hard Way. Go! Ruby! Some basic programming experience, like one of the courses above, might be helpful (but not necessarily required if youâre patient with yourself).
4. Learn to make a mobile game.
If youâre not interested in coding anything other than fun game apps, you could trythis course from the University of Reading. It promises to teach you how to build a game in Java, even if you donât have programming experience! If you want to make a truly great game, you might want to read/listen up on Game Theory first.
5. Start reading faster.
Spreeder is a free online program that will improve your reading skill and comprehension no matter how old you are. With enough practice, you could learn to double, triple, or even quadruple the speed at which you read passages currently, which is basically like adding years to your life.
6. Learn a language!
With Duolingo, you can learn Spanish, French, Portuguese, Italian, or English (from any of the above or more). Thereâs a mobile app and a website, and the extensive courses are completely free.
Full disclosure: BuzzFeed and other websites are in a partnership with DuoLingo, but they did not pay or ask for this placement.
7. Pickle your own vegetables.
Tired of your farmerâs market haul going bad before you use it all? Or do you just love tangy pickled veggies? You too can pickle like a pro thanks to SkillShare and Travis Grillo.
8. Improve your public speaking skills.
You can take the University of Washingtonâs Intro to Public Speaking for free online. Once you learn a few tricks of the trade, youâll be able to go into situations like being asked to present at a company meeting or giving a presentation in class without nearly as much fear and loathing.
9. Get a basic handle of statistics.
UC Berkeley put a stats intro class on iTunes. Once you know how to understand the numbers yourself, youâll never read a biased ânewsâ article the same way again â 100% of authors of this post agree!
10. Understand basic psychology.
Knowing the basics of psych will bring context to your understanding of yourself, the dynamics of your family and friendships, whatâs really going on with your coworkers, and the woes and wonders of society in general. Yale University has its Intro to Psychology lectures online for free.
11. Make your own music.
Step one: Learn how to play guitar: Justin Guitar is a fine and free place to start learning chords and the basic skills youâll need to be able to play guitar â from there, itâs up to you, but once you know the basics, just looking up tabs for your favorite songs and learning them on your own is how many young guitar players get their start (plus itâs an excellent party trick).
Step two: A delightful free voice lesson from Berklee College Of Music.
Step three: Have you always thought you had an inner TSwift? Berklee College of Music offers an Introduction to Songwriting course completely for free online. The course is six weeks long, and by the end of the lesson youâll have at least one completed song.
Step four: Lifehackerâs basics of music production will help you put it all together once you have the skills down! Youâll be recording your own music, ready to share with your valentine or the entire world, in no time!
12. Learn to negotiate.
Let Stanfordâs Stan Christensen explain how to negotiate in business and your personal life, managing relationships for your personal gain and not letting yourself be steamrolled. There are a lot of football metaphors and itâs great.
13. Stop hating math.
If you struggled with math throughout school and now have trouble applying it in real-world situations when it crops up, try Saylor.orgâs Real World Math course. It will reteach you basic math skills as they apply IRL. Very helpful!
14. Start drawing!
All kids draw â so why do we become so afraid of it as adults? Everyone should feel comfortable with a sketchbook and pencil, and sketching is a wonderful way to express your creativity. DrawSpace is a great place to start. (I also highly recommend the book Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain if you can drop a few dollars for a used copy.)
15. Make your own animated GIF.
BuzzFeedâs own Katie Notopoulos has a great, simple guide to making an animated GIF without Photoshop. This is all you need to be the king or queen of Tumblr or your favorite email chains.
16. Appreciate jazz.
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Have you never really âgottenâ jazz? If you want to be able to participate in conversations at fancy parties and/or just add some context to your appreciation of all music, try this free online course from UT Austin.
17. Write well.
Macalester Collegeâs lecture series is excellent. If youâre more interested in journalism, try Wikiversityâs course selection.
18. Get better at using Photoshop.
Another invaluable skill that will get you places in your career, learning Photoshop can be as fun as watching the hilarious videos on You Suck At Photoshop or as serious as this extensive Udemy training course (focused on photo retouching).
19. Take decent pictures.
Lifehackerâs basics of photography might be a good place to start. Learn how your camera works, the basic of composition, and editing images in post-production. If you finish that and youâre not sure what to do next, hereâs a short course on displaying and sharing your digital photographs.
20. Learn to knit.
Instructables has a great course by a woman who is herself an online-taught knitter. Youâll be making baby hats and cute scarves before this winterâs over!
21. Get started with investing in stocks.
If you are lucky enough to have a regular income, you should start learning about savings and investment now. Investopedia has a ton of online resources, including this free stocks basics course. Invest away!
22. Clean your house in a short amount of time.
Unf$#k Your Habitat has a great emergency cleaning guide for when your mother-in-law springs a surprise visit on you. While youâre over there, the entire blog is good for getting organized and clean in the long term, not just in âemergencies.â Youâll be happier for it.
23. Start practicing yoga.
Most cities have free community classes (try just searching Google or inquiring at your local yoga studio), or if youâre more comfortable trying yoga at home, YogaGlohas a great 15-day trial and Yome is a compendium of 100% free yoga videos. If youâre already familiar with basic yoga positions but you need an easy way to practice at home, I recommend YogaTailorâs free trial as well.
24. Tie your shoelaces more efficiently.
Itâs simple and just imagine the minutes of your life youâll save!