Jace

What a tough situation we’re in

Fighting for her Love

She can’t seem to stop talking about you, and I’ll admit it makes me jealous

But I’m too fucking happy for her it doesn’t really matter

But the moment I hear her say you didn’t text

The moment I see her smile fade when she speaks of you

The moment you try to break her heart

I will make you regret it

Don’t be another boy who doesn’t care

Don’t you break her heart

Don’t you dare.”

Sometimes, when missing you gets too hard, and your scent is no longer lingering on my sheets, on my clothes, I dream of impossible things. I imagine going back and telling you everything; after our first night, after our first meeting, after our first date. God, if I could go back, the first thing I'd do would be kissing you.

And then telling you everything.

But I can't go back. i don't get to start over. But I hope some other version of me does. Somewhere in another life, another world, I hope we're happy. I hope that there is a world where I haven't hurt you.

Where we keep each other safe and loved.

And maybe, in this one, someday we'll get a happy ending, too. I can only hope.

It's the only thing I have left.”

And I think you're right. I'm the last person who deserves your heart. But god, I want to be the person who does deserve it. I need to be that person. What if you need me to be that person, too?

I should let you go. But you should let me go, too. And you can't. If you could, I wouldn't be writing this.

What if there's something else? What if we're being told something that we can't hear over our hurt and guilt? What if there's a reason why we keep coming back, and even when we decide to get away, we stumble into each other?

I remember asking you if you thought we were meant to be.

You never did reply to that question. I wonder what your answer would be now.

I wonder if you'd want to hear what I think. And the truth is, I don't know.

I'm afraid of thinking we are. Because if we are, then... I managed to break your heart, ruin my life, and piss off powers that be, all in two months.

But what if we are meant to be? I wish you'd talk to me.

I have so many questions, and I can't find answers without you.”