Melanie

I’ll still never get over how much this picture looks like Hannibal Buress without actually being a picture of a human

One time I worked as a personal assistant for this rich dude. He was pretty ok for like. A dude w more money than I can rlly comprehend? Anyways a part of his assets was this grain processing plant; idk what they actually did I just ran errands for the dude n made sure he wasn’t bothered from big money decisions basically. Glorified coffee bitch? Anyways we’re working one day and the workers catch this random lady like??? Taking bags of whatever the hell they kept in the plant. We’re getting ready to call the cops, I’m getting anxious, and the boss…….. tells them to let her go. He tells her she’s allowed to take only what she can carry in her own arms. So she scrambled off with the bag of wheat or corn or whatever ???? And the crews super confused and the boss goes “do not stop her from getting what she can carry” & so that happens again like once a week for the next few months. I find out she’s actually an immigrant and a widow? Living with her dead husbands mom. She’s been stealing to feed her mom in law. Anyways eventually one day she like. Approached my boss. In his office.

welcome to my kitchen...