bad wolf;

It was never his turn. It would never be his turn and he would never get his way. Wanting it so fiercely made him feel selfish and hurt and angry at his own capability to feel either. And anyone else he would just let go, but her, her he can’t and doesn’t want to. Trying to keep Rose Tyler around is like trying to catch smoke. He would so usually just fall into silence and wave a hand at the door and tell them  to leave but instead tears sparkle in his eyes and voice has some pitiful shake to it. He is a selfish creature and he HATES himself for it.                                                                  “Please.”                                         

She could see the look in his eyes and knew what it was like, seeing the one you love so much go. After all, Rose was the one who watched him go, time and  time again, on that bloody beach, every night in her sleep. Each time trying to make something different, to go after him, to manage to grasp only the image of the man saying her name and then disappearing as if he was never there... And now Rose Tyler was doing the same thing to his other face; much more pained, creased, but with a sad smile she could recognize everywhere.

       “I’m sorry, Doctor.” She said, weighing her words     and pressing the tips of her fingers to his cheek, own     eyes filled with tears as well. “I’m doing this for you.     For both of us, and the rest of the world. I need to go.”

Just to let everyone know, for future reference, that @flirtlater is Rose’s main Ten (Kurt and I have been loving each other for a year and a half now shhh), and it’s definite that a romantic shipping will only be done with that Ten.

Rose glanced down at the girl, a small grimace appearing on her features. Guilt, if anything. Wine was just one of the ingredients of the Doctor’s instant remedies, and she was not exactly sure if the girl would be as eager to drink it once she found out.

How Rose always ended up on kitchen duty, she didn’t have a clue, but there she was, standing among all of these people, trying to figure out which one of them was the alien threatening to wipe the entire human race from Earth. Just a regular Thursday, being a time traveler. The Doctor wandered off somewhere, leaving her standing among volunteers who were listening to the instructions and possible problems they could come across during the day. It was both a good and a bad thing that there were so many people here; the ability to investigate the possible alien without being noticed was high, and on the other hand, the fact that there were just so many  of them left the possibility of anyone being the monster they were looking for. What was the thing with aliens and human forms, anyway?

Her thoughts came to a stop suddenly when one of the girls spoke to her and Rose turned to her. She smiled guiltily. “Somethin’ about it being prohibited to steal food for yourself, I think.” Her nose scrunched and she shook her head. “Sorry, spaced out today, me. Wasn’t really how I thought I’d spend it. I don’t mind, of course, helpin’ is what I do. Just... not this kind of help.” She looked around, as if for clues, then turned to the girl again. “What about you, if you don’t mind me askin’? You don’t look the type who does this very often, either.”

“What, considering that you once got body swapped with a vengeful human trampoline, possessed by the TARDIS, and had to spend a whole forty-six hours aboard this ship with your mother? Ah, you’re fine. Still got a smile on your face.” he reasoned, one of his ever knowledgeable pondering little frowns upon his face in mild teasing. Still, she takes everything in her stride. Always. Nothing phases Rose Tyler any more. Defender of The Earth just doesn’t cover it any more. But when she jumps to her feet quite suddenly, his reaction spells that he became for a moment quite lost in thought. A double take with a startled blink that soon melts into a smile. Still, eyes narrow at her wiggling fingers, a tempting offer to just run away into the depths of the TARDIS and merely while away the hours messing about in the wardrobe with the myriad of ridiculous clothes and costumes that lay around. Perhaps this was how it felt when he did the same. In that moment the realisation that he was a teasing and all too excitable companion struck him, if he was anything like this. The Doctor hardly hesitated, though, soon jumping from his seat and taking her hand, the pair of them wandering along quite as per usual. “Fair few corridors down, though.” he supposed, peering down the first hallway of a series of them. “Fancy a run? Old habits die hard.”

“Yeah, y’know, great times.” Rose returned the grin, tongue poking from the corner of her mouth in a way she only did when she was around him. He made her feel everything at once, excitement,  happiness, the constant wish to run, further and further again, among the stars, with him by her side to hold her hand. All of these things she would never say, though, but Rose was sure that he already knew. They both did. Once he sprang to his feet as well, her eyes followed him, thinking how his hair had a mind of its own. She must have taken that thought into so much consideration that his suggestion almost slipped her attention. Almost.

     “You bet’cha. Loser pays for chips?”

Might as well make it a competition, knowing how he lit up at any type of challenge. The past several days have been a challenge in itself, and Rose could not be happier, bitchy trampolines and werewolves be damned.

Without waiting for his answer, she squeezed his hand and set off down the hallway after letting it go, well aware that she was yet to learn all the passageways that lead to the wardrobe, but deciding to stick with her gut. 

       “Come on, then, Doctor! Bein’ too slow over there, are we?

“–– Well that’s where I see the Doctor.” John Smith told her, with this sad tired whisper. “That’s where I see all his adventures. It’s funny and possibly a little bit sad that’s all just a dream in the end?” He passes her the tea he’s made, the chips set next to them still  wrapped in paper, provided for his guest to the UNIT cupboard.  “Sometimes, If I try very hard, the Doctor talks to me in my dreams.   But it’s all just stories…stories that I’ve made up, a children’s tale.” He doesn’t know the truth of course, that story and dreams of the  Doctor are his own – memories wiped in such a way he doesn’t  even see them as his own. It’s all a fairy tale to John, nicknamed by Unit as the Mad Man in a box….only because of course that his little live in cupboard was so small.

At first, Rose doesn’t understand. It is hard for her to connect the dots, mostly because she is still out of the loop a bit - impromptu jumping through dimensions would do a number on anyone - but as he continues talking she realizes that it is not just any doctor this man is talking about... and her heart sinks.       Now it is a bit clearer to her, the reason the canon lead her here, only she has to figure out how this man is connected to the Doctor. From his words, though, it seems as if he does not know either. As she takes the tea and sips at it, burning her  tongue a little, Rose is careful about her next words.

                “Oooh, you’re scared.” It was a teasing little hum, however he himself even glanced over at the door in order to check that Jackie wasn’t there. But no, alas, she wasn’t after all, and so he went back to wrapping presents with an amused if rather mischievous snickering laugh. “Oi, that was an accident. Covered it up well, mind you. I dread to think if she ever found out about everything I’d ever broken, she’d skin me alive.” Ribbon went around the present, slender hands working busily to tie the bow, glasses now balanced on the end of his nose. A disbelieving little snort came from him at her mention of children, however the grin that he caught out of the corner of his eye, it looked so full of hope. And hope was dangerous. He didn’t even know if they could- A quick inhale as another box was handed to him, quickly wrapping it in silence in hoping to busy himself. “You got any more tape over there?” 

        Rose grumbled a little to his teasing, yet did not take it seriously. After all, they were both terrified of Jackie when she went on a rampage, especially during holidays. “’Least I know what to blackmail you with.” She quipped, tossing some of the tape of to him as she tried to make the ribbons additionally wavy. After all, breaking the angel ornament was much bigger of a crime than ruining a perfectly painted boiled egg, and they both knew it. Her smile faltered somewhat though, seeing that he avoided the topic of children, yet that was hardly news. Rose always assumed that Time Lords and humans could not procreate, yet was always terrified to ask. “D’you know what? I think some hot cocoa’d do us both good, what do you think?” It was better to let it go, Rose thought, and once their eyes met, she smiled widely once again. “I’ve got those cookies you like so much.”