Unfortunately, a DC blog

im a poser (larper if u use that slang) in pjo community idk thalia’s personality (havent read, havent watch s2)

Well everyone except Magical Mysteries Billy, who is watching from the side with a sense of horror.

MM!B: Why… why is everyone here like 10?

Movie Billy, who is leaning against a wall with a can of energy next to him, can only shrug.

MM!B: They are all kids, tweens at most! And all of them orphaned. Surely their wizards made some mistakes, right? RIGHT?

MM!Billy signs, turning towards his only “age buddy” in the room, who is mindlessly tapping the side of his can.

MM!B: at least there is one other wizard out there that chose an older kid.

M!Billy couldn’t help but cringe as MM!Billy said that, trying out a bunch of words before biting the bullet.

M!B: Uhm. I gained my powers when I was barely fourteen.

double sided cap/billy keychains are now available on ACGgoods!!!!!

Billy Batson as Captain marvel except his vocabulary is actually deranged and he keeps referring to his divine and godly powers through brainrot terms, specifically Solomon is the one suffering.

In Billy’s defense a kid has to find someway to cope with 6 voices in his head randomly interjecting and distracting him, why not treat them like twitch stream? It’s easier than trying to conceptually process the fact that Hercules is trying to get him to start a bar fight.

Captain marvel has someone try to brainwash him and just says “chat, ban this guy.”

Captain marvel is lost and just loudly starts treating Solomon like Siri. “Solomon, subways near me.” “Solomon, portal, how to. How to make portal. Portal tutorial…Solomon, how to teleport . Teleportation tutorial. Teleportation play-through. Solomon-

Captain marvel gets lectured at by the Wonder Woman and just scowls while he mutters “Solomon, Mute these guys.” And settles for being deaf for the next seven minutes. Superman very quickly realizes the guys not hearing a thing they say but honestly he wants see how this plays out because this is by far the most interesting thing he’s seen at a league meeting.

Captain marvel starts daydreaming during a league meeting and instead of locking in when Batman calls him out he just loudly asks “Solomon, meeting spark notes. Summarize meeting. Solomon… Solomon playing meeting 2x speed. Solomon-“

Captain Marvel gets attacked while passing by gothom. Not even a serious attempt it’s kinda pathetic compared to what he deals with as champion of magic so he just glares at Condiment king trying to hit him with acidic mustard and obnoxiously declares “Can we get a F in the chat. Solomon give this guy a 0/10 on Yelp.”

Captain marvel refuses to make sacrifices. That word sounds kinda ominous…so he instead settles for donations “Chat if we can get 6 whole views on the stream right now I’ll give a donation of 4 barrels of wine. Chat please. Holy moly chat spam gifts or this channel might get banned permanently…CHAT SPAM LIGHTING STICKERS-“

Captain marvel is just so weirdly acclimatizing to his very strange life. The crocodiles threaten to start eating people again and he just blinks at them mouth drawn in a straight line “not to like power scale or whatever but I’ll totally clutch if we 1 v 12. My mods said I have to end the stream by midnight. So…”

Captain marvel is also a little iffy about the whole entire constantly being watched thing. He’s debating the ethics of skipping the subway fair as Billy and just hopping over the bars like he usually does. “…Chat pause the stream.” He whispers conspiratorially, as if his patrons aren’t well aware of his living habits and general tendencies

Captain marvel goes on a mission with the justice league wandering away from a active conversation and walks up to a glowing pebble. He picks it up and swallows it whole, when he meets the horrified stares of several league members he just justify it by saying “Oh I uh held a poll and the votes said to this was the easiest way to dispose of the artifact so….”