emo queen

being intuitive is just like... i don’t like this and no i will not elaborate

I feel better now knowing the cat wasn’t actually being yelled at or mocked.

That cat looks like the lovechild of Lil Bub and Princess Monster Truck and yes I know they’re girls.

some of the most sensitive areas of the female body

Oh yeah because I’m just gonna rub her eyes until a she’s horny

Kiss her there you walnut! Use tenderness! Hold her face gently and stroke her eyelids with your thumb and then kiss them! Run your hands down to her neck when you do! THINK!!! Lordie, you have a lot to learn that TOUCH gives more than making her “horny” you’ll drive her nuts doing gentle stuff! It’s trust! It’s care! It’s sensitivity! *smacks your forehead* You want her to be numb in complete ecstasy! I know this shit and I’m ASEXUAL! 

Reblogging purely for the beautiful use of the word “walnut” as an insult.

“walnut” lmao I love this

Cmon…. support your boy….. he’s nervous….

brad once fed me pepper spray without my knowledge