Batgirl

A desperate hug.

So whenever there’s an opening and the Red Hood has to hire a new guy, there’s an interview waitlist the length of a neighborhood block.

Jason: So, Batman. You like him?

Applicant: Uh. No?

Jason, writing in his notepad: I see

Applicant: Is that good or bad?

Jason who saw this rich man that was 12x stronger then him and used his only weapon, (his teeth) to fight back. He left an imprint of his teeth on Bruce's hand.

Tim who needs to prove a point to Batman and bites the side of batmans suit in between the armored plates. He drew blood. Bruce invested in Kevlar as a result.

__

Bruce: no Damian you cannot go on patrol. You are 11.

Damian: (growling noises)

Damian: (crawls up to Bruce and Bruce thinking he wants a hug, leans down)

Damian: (bites down hard)

Bruce: fuck!

Dick: oh he's gonna fit in fine.

Red hood: that has got to hurt.

Tim: wait who tf are u?

--

Bonus where Bruce tries to talk to cass for the first time. He gets bitten.

--

Bruce meets Duke and stands 5 feet away, waving around adoption papers.

Duke: ok I understand the you're trying to get me to agree to be adopted by you but why tf are u standing so far away.

Bruce: please don't bite me

Tim: Damian's girlfriend.

Dick: Damian has a girlfriend?!

Damian: She’s not my girlfriend.

Bruce: How long has this been going on?

Jason: Four months.

Damian: She's NOT my girlfriend.

Dick: So let me get this straight, for the last four months Bruce and I have been asking you three what’s new and none of you thought to tell us that Damian has a girlfriend?

Bruce: Look, I didn't really call about the case, it's just I was wondering if you're alright? You know, financially?

Jason: I'm still drawing from my allowance and you know, crime lord stuff.

Bruce: OK but you're eating properly, yes? Vegetables? Fruit? I know you can look after yourself it's just well, I worry.

Jason: *in an apron cooking chicken cordon bleu and potato gratin with a creme brulee warming in the oven*

Dick: *on his couch inhaling Cheerios*

Tim: *face down on the kitchen table, face stuck to a case file*

Cass: *sat in the corner dissociating*

Steph: *joking about how much of a terrible Robin she was*

Duke: *ruminating over the fuck up he made on patrol 4 days ago*

Damian: *sat with his arm in a sling after overdoing it during training and patrol*

Barbara: How did you get in my house?

Tim, bored: Or just say "They’ll be finding parts of you for at least four months, and you’ll still be alive for three of them."

Jason: Now that’s a threat!

Jason: How much of a drop would you say that is? Can you see the bottom?

Tim: It's too dark. We could chuck a stone down or something.

Jason: Oh yeah, good idea.

Jason: *pushes Tim in*

Tim: *screams*

*thud*