Welcome To My Kitchen

My blog is a safe space for burnouts, flakes, layabouts, ne'er-do-wells, underachievers, and anyone who can't be arsed

All Quiet On The Frontal Lobe

I think venus flytraps should be intelligent and ambulatory. I think they should get into the cupboards. I think they should purr when you pet them.

This sounds like a great idea until they end up in Cleveland, Des Moines, Peoria, New York, etc. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

everybody’s always so worried about short kings getting carried off by predatory birds i’ll have you know the birds are Not planning to eat them and i know Several men under 5’6” who have had full and happy lives after having been raised in a nest

cats are small and you can pick them up

but watch out