*pronounces “champagne” like “lasagne”*

do Not

*Pronounces “lasagne” like “champagne”*

do NOT

hi im a cashew white guy and I’m gonna say a slur to be funny because fuck political correctness

i just realized that autocorrect changed cishet to cashew I’m going to bed

why did I not question “cashew” as a type of white guy tho

this is my favourite vine tbh

ME TOO

He is the best seal.

@lukespringsteen

Netflix and chill by yourself except Netflix sucks and you’re also too depressed to give a shit to pick something out from Netflix so you just go ahead and stare vacantly into the screen for several hours while reruns of some stupid sitcom air until another day has eclipsed and you’re a little closer to the moment of pure ecstasy that will come with the end of this cartoonish nightmare that is your existence

Netflix and existential crisis

So talented.

Someone: you have free time to do this thing! Me: sorry, that time is reserved for mood swings,depression, and self loathing