Trying to challenge deeply-held beliefs because I do think ultimately having Core Foundational Beliefs that are really negative is gonna trap me in negative thinking (just by virtue of the thing I always come back to being. y'know. not really positive) but it's also DAMN HARD has anyone ever managed it
#like at the end of the day I DO belief death/nonexistence is preferable to life#and that informs a lot of my thinking#like I don't condone murder cause I think that's a violation of someone else's bodily autonomy (killing them without permission)#BUT I also think giving birth is a violation of someone's bodily autonomy (forcing them to exist without permission?)#and this is broadly not. an accepted worldview and I also understand living like 'being dead would be better :) ' is. I can see the problem#but!!! I guess I don't understand how people arrive at the opposite conclusion#like WHY would life be preferrable? why would causing someone to exist be a good thing?#you can be like 'life has good things in it!' but it also doesn't? and I think if you talked to the majority of people#they would agree it kind of sucks? like everyone *I* talk to doesn't really like being here#they just go through the motions. go to work come home. have addictions. hate their kids and jobs and families#but then again I guess most people don't think it over before having kids idk.#I'm not having kids in any case. but I would like to know what's actually good about being alive#cause I have a gratitude journal and I did all the stuff you're supposed to do and at the end of the day#will I kick around? yeah sure why not. but I also don't want to live a DAY longer than I have to#and I see people say they want to live forever. why? why would you want that? that's what I want to know
