HELLO HAVE U SEEN MY SON
Finding Nemoo
wallacepolsom
noise dept.

Sade Olutola
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

#extradirty
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

Love Begins
One Nice Bug Per Day
TVSTRANGERTHINGS

roma★
cherry valley forever
Claire Keane
Game of Thrones Daily

★

shark vs the universe
d e v o n

tannertan36

ellievsbear
hello vonnie
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@trollftw
HELLO HAVE U SEEN MY SON
Finding Nemoo

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Many Lands Under One Sun by Rick Crane
You halfway through Dinner w/ parents when she says "Daddy can you pass the yams"...
Out of instinct you reach for it the same time her pops do…sooo now her dad looking at you like..
Meanwhile you looking back like…
Yo girl sitting there like..
& Her mom lowkey freak ass sitting there like…
Grandma be like
Grandpa be like
The dog like
The cat like
The bird like..
The Uncle under his breath like…..
Pastors wife be like
Ohmygawd 😂
Big brother be like
I have to reblog this 😂 I just have to!
A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk
Originally posted by disneyasastrology
BWAHAHAHAHAH.
the way i learned this, it was always told through spoken word. And you’d do the door thing for ages. AGES. literally just making up any old material. ‘behind the foam door is a door made of spinach’ that kind of shit. Go on until whoever is listening has already begged you to stop and has now gone on to pleading, clutching your shirt on their knees pleading. And when you finally said the last line? People went fucking nuts Like there was a good chance of just getting the teeth knocked out of you after telling that joke.
A friend of mine did that shit for 30 minutes on a camp once. The entire fucking bus just exploded in anger when she finished. It was a fucking massacre.

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Funny posts you like?
frenums:
skeleton smartypants was defeated once and for all
THE REACTION FACES JUST MAKE THIS 84927 TIMES FUNNIER
This is my kind of humor
she had curves in all the right places, and all the left places, also, and in places forgotten by time, and in places known only by dwarven scholars

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id honestly shit myself
"Oh asphalt, tell me your secrets."
Hey y’all, it’s me B with Blue Ivy just hanging out
Y’all cmere
Come closer
Lemme holla at y’all a second
Y’all want this damn baby?
This will never not make me laugh.

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check out this new keyboard i bought
HOW RICH ARE YOU
The keyboard was only like $60 dude
THE FUCKING KEYBOARD IS 60 DOLLARS TOO
ARE YOU KIDDING ME
BUT
OH MY GOD
I’M TALKING ABOUT YOUR ENTIRE DESK
The desk cost me like $75 from Ikea
Seriously
ONE is enough
but you have to go and get THREE moniters
why do you need THREE moniters
Are you really not gonna mention it? Really? Are you all blind? The door mat is off centre
I really hate these posts with really weird ass pictures and a bunch of people adding comments pointing out normal shit… I mean for real guys? Are we really just gonna ignore the fact that this person has a floor fan facing AWAY for their desk?
They probably use the fan to blow the heat away from their computer. Are we not going to talk about the really interesting part of this picture? I mean seriously. They have an epic ass star wars poster and you guys are commenting on some mundane shit.
damn that’s a lot of dildos