Lithobreaking into Heaven

"I'm already wearing these stupid things." He shook out his sleeves to show the silver, white, and green bracelets that acted as low-level, constant Plasmius Maximuses. Maximi? Maximodes? Whatever. Vlad sucked at naming things anyway.

"And yet," said Vlad, smoothly, "you still were able to shout Skulker out of the sky. That sort of behavior puts some people on edge, you know."

"What, would they have preferred for him to skin me and tack my pelt to the wall?"

"Doubtlessly. I'm surprised you didn't consider this eventuality when you revealed yourself to the whole world."

Danny hissed at him, frustrated.

"Oh, and there's that of course. Anyone would think that you meant to bite them. Especially with those teeth." He picked up his coffee mug and took a long, slow drink.

The object on the table was a muzzle. One sized to fit a human face, specifically Danny's. It glowed a dull green that told Danny it was made of ectoplasmically enhanced components, and was otherwise silver and plasticky white. "Who made it?"

"The GIW commissioned it from Axiom Labs, then reviewed it in-house before delivering it here yesterday."

"And you didn't tell me yesterday because...?"

"Because I had to review it myself. As your legal guardian, I couldn't very well allow you to wear it without making sure it wasn't going to do you harm. It would be irresponsible."

In Vlad's defense, the thing didn't look as hideously uncomfortable as it could have. The edges of the hard-plastic-and-metal front, where they would come into contact with Danny's skin, were padded, and although it looked like it was designed to hold Danny's jaw closed, there was something of a mouthguard that would keep him from grinding his teeth together, or breaking them as he clenched his jaw in rage.

Something like a mouthguard. He prodded the soft plastic where it would go over his tongue, and found something hard and unyielding inside it.

"How am I supposed to even answer questions or talk to teachers with this thing?"

"I suspect you aren't, but perhaps you can work on your handwriting, or try to convince them to learn sign language."

"I'm not wearing this," said Danny.

"Then I suppose I'll have to start looking for a home tutor for you and look into the appropriate homeschooling paperwork."

Danny swallowed back a snarl.

"Honestly, Daniel, it isn't my fault that your parents were arrested for opening a portal to another dimension and endangering the lives of everyone in the entire world, and it isn't my fault that you decided the best way to deal with that was to reveal yourself and have them convicted of child endangerment and neglect." Vlad gave a genteel shrug. "I'm only telling you what your options are: Wear that monstrosity, or be homeschooled here. And your omelette is getting cold."

Danny glared down at it, then, finally, sat in his chair, across the table from Vlad. "It's GPS location locked?" he asked.

"Just like those little bracelets of yours," said Vlad. "You won't be able to take it off anywhere but here."

"Great." No lunch for him, then, he guessed. "Any other trackers?"

"I've installed an override," said Vlad.

"And your own, I bet." Danny would have to do his own review and figure out how to install his own overrides.

"It's only responsible."

"Uh huh," said Danny. "Whatever." He shoveled the remains of his omelette into his mouth as quickly as possible.

"I would advise you to brush your teeth before putting that on," said Vlad.

Danny made a rude gesture at him, then pushed back his chair, grabbed the muzzle, and stalked off to the bathroom to figure out how to put the stupid thing on.

As terrible an idea as this was, if Danny had to stay here with Vlad all day, there'd be a murder.

He brushed his teeth aggressively, then scowled down at the muzzle. They couldn't have sent an instruction manual or something? What an absolute pain.

He picked the mouthguard up first, rinsed it off in the sink - he didn't want Vlad's greasy fingerprints in his mouth - and stuck it in his mouth, moving it around with his tongue until it sat flush against his teeth. Was the GIW stealing his dental records, or did Vlad 'adjust' it using his cloning crap? He wouldn't get a straight answer out of either of them, so he supposed it didn't really matter. Either way, the metal bars hidden in the plastic pressed down firmly on his tongue and each of his teeth were covered by squishy plastic.

Although... biting down on the plastic was weirdly satisfying, like biting into a particularly firm blob ghost.

Danny sighed through his nose, and picked up the rest of the thing. He brushed the straps to the side and held the mask of the muzzle over the front of his face. There were a few small holes in the front, but it was already obvious that breathing through it would be incredibly annoying.

He shook his head and started the process of finding all the straps and buckles. The buckles weren't the standard plastic snaps that were on backpacks or dog collars, but strange highly technological lumps of metal. As soon as he snapped one together, it cinched itself tight against his skull, pulling the edge of the mask part tight against his skin.

Finally, there was just one set of straps left, one that hung off the bottom of the mask and then split into two.

Danny growled in the back of his throat. They had to be kidding.

After fuming for a minute, he picked up the straps and wrapped them around his neck, putting together the clasp and bracing as it pulled tight into a choker collar. Then, he just stood there, leaning on the edge of the bathroom counter, breathing heavily. This was humiliating. He hated it. He hated it so much. He hated them.

One of his hands came up to pull on the muzzle. He could take it off and throw it through the front window of the GIW office. The bracelets, too. And then maybe he'd kill them all.

He sucked in a deep breath and held it, closing his eyes. No. If he did that, he couldn't hang out with Sam and Tucker anymore, and the possibility of doing that was the only thing helping him hold it together.

This was... fine. He'd make it be fine.