Sweet Dreams, Bro

While still living in my parents house, my brother Mike screamed from his bedroom that he wasn't coming to todays Jet game due to the possibility of rain. I ran to his room and he was standing on his bed, fixing his knife collection, explaining that he refuses to get wet. This caused a chain reaction of weird events:

- My other brother Ron agreed with Mike, no longer going to the game - leaving 4 tickets to me and my other other brother Rob.

- Rob was running late, he was still at a fantasy football draft party with Frank. During my conversation with him I could actually see him there, like a camera would cut over to him. He was dressed in a tuxedo at a fancy dining hall.

- I went to the bathroom (my parents blue one) and when I flushed the toilet, a hole broke through the side and ants started pouring out. Mixing with the water now leaking out of the side, this made for a very gross ant soup that was quickly getting everywhere. I ran out of the bathroom and closed the door.

Jeefo and I were waiting outside for the final night sale of Waldbaums. It was closing down and despite neither of us wanting to buy anything, we felt we should check it out since it was our neighborhood grocery store since we were kids.

So I only remember bits of it…but what a dream last night…me, you, Matt and Dito are at some bar that is like a beer garden with picnic tables.

I don't remember why but Dito gets into a fight with a bigger dude and its like a full on Fight Club fight at the bar. Ditos throwing crazy haymakers and losing. Me , you and Matt are watching and it Matt keeps saying dont worry it's coming..suddenly Dito has an assualt rifle in his hands and uses it to knock the shit out of the other guy and wins.

Paul, a few other people I can't remember, and myself, were fighting a giant worm-like monster in the service hallways of the Staten Island Mall. The battle was very "Monster Hunter" like, probably because I've been playing a lot of that game lately.

The dream mostly consisted of us chasing the Monster through the hallways, with it peaking out every so often for us to attack. There was one specific part where I grabbed a rocket launcher and blindly shot it down a ventilation shaft, thinking it would bounce it's way to the hiding monster. The result was quite the opposite, as it instead caused multiple injuries to dozens of innocent people. I decided to stick with my melee weapons after the incident.

Christine and I decided to open the pool a little early. I called Robbie over to help me get the cover off and carry the filter out. As we pulled the cover off, we noticed a 6 foot alligator living in my pool. We quickly threw the cover off and ran in the house.

The alligator was wild. It was running all over the yard - until it saw us peeking through the backyard sliders. It made a mad dash for us, but kept smashing into the glass. Rob was trying to lock the door but the constant smashing was making it very difficult.

After about 10 minutes of smashing, the gator gave up and clawed a hole through my fence, into my neighbors yard. While this was going on, I've been trying to get the phone number to The Pool Doctor, for some reason I thought they'd be able to remove the alligator.

Christine is oblivious to this entire situation. She comes downstairs and is mad at me. Something about the upstairs deck being a mess and I should've cleaned it earlier. As she's explaining the upstairs issue, I'm trying to butt in and tell her there's a 6 foot alligator outside. She never let's me get the full story out.

In a beach town, with mostly run down/closed shops. While window browsing, I discover one of the shops sells vintage videogames - specifically complete/boxed games for the Sega Master System. The store is in great shape, but closed. I knock on the front door, and am greeted by Ted DiBiase. After much convincing, he finally decides to let me browse.

Back on Gurley Ave. I'm watching my kids, nieces and nephews. They're all playing together on the sidewalk, and eventually make their way up the block 2 houses away from my parents. As I walk up the block to catch up, I see that all of the kids are now playing inside the garage of 373(?) Gurley Avenue.

I run up the driveway and see that nobody is home, trying to get the kids out of the garage and back to my parents. The garage is pretty empty, with the exception of a cardboard box, filled with junk. I look through the junk and notice 2 considerably large stacks of cash. Tempted to grab it, I ultimately decide to instead grab the kids, close the garage, and get back to my parents house before someone gets home.

On my way back to my parents, I see Mike, Rob & Ron sitting in a parked car, with another car parked in front of them. Inside the 2nd car are 2 people I don't recognize. I grab my brothers, explain what I saw in the garage and we all make our way over.

For some reason we break in through the front door instead of opening the garage. We eventually get to the garage, find the money, grab it, and make our way out. As we get to the front door, the residents of the home arrive back. Before they have a chance to see us, I yell out "Hold on, I got this" and somehow get out the front and hide in the bushes. My brothers are all still trapped inside, looking for hiding spots.

The residents quickly find my brothers, then suddenly the 2 strangers from earlier appear - one dressed as a UPS deliveryman, the other in a suit. Both are holding guns at the residents, asking for the money. They see my hiding in the bushes, fire a round at me but miss. I pretend like they shot me and lay dead in the bushes.

Something about Amanda Carlock's wedding - everything was made of Sam Adams.

Me, Sniz, and a few others try to sneak into Dick Clark's Rockin Eve. We disguise ourselves as workers and carry a barricade through like we are going to set it up somewhere. Apparently it worked.

Trying to get into my parents house on Gurley Avenue, I realized I had no key and was locked out. For some reason I had a small animal sidekick, but don't remember what it looked like. As I make my way to the corner or Abington Ave, my sidekick calls me over to an odd spot of the street. He discovers a giant hole and yells "Hey, I found a short cut!"

We make our way into the hole, but he's suddenly gone. The hole leads to inside of a hospital. Looking for an exit, I come up with the idea to pose as a janitor so I can use an employee elevator. I grab a pillow and yell "Someone needs this upstairs!"

Everyone stops to look at me (inception style), but then turns around and continues their business. I find an elevator, press the button - but the door jams because I held the pillow too far out. I pull the pillow back in and the elevator closes.

The door opens and now I'm in the Flashner's house. I walk around the living room area, Beth is following me asking me a million questions (I'm pretty sure she was flirting with me). I keep walking in circles on the main floor, with Beth in tow, when I throw the pillow on the couch and politely make my escape. I'm standing on their stoop when I notice 2 things:

1. The railing on their stoop is sawed in half

2. The door to my parents house (across the street) is now a slot machine, apparently I need to play it and hit 3 cherries to open the door

I was at a football game, only it was a gigantic piece of land wil a dozen football fields - with multiple games going on at once.

The cheerleaders came out, only they were a high school squad w/ both boys and girls. So the squad starts their cheer, and they start flipping girls in the air. Someone turns to me and says "Watch how high they flip this dude" when they suddenly launch him what looked like 20 feet into the air.

My mom's christmas tree is all set up in the den. My entire family is there, including people that have been long deceased - Aunt ReRe, Uncle Joe, Aunt Jackie, etc.

Mike comes barging through the house with a box of Star Wars christmas decorations. In the box were things like an R2D2 tree topper and giant C3PO limb ornaments.

On top of the giant box of ornaments we decide to redecorate the tree with, we carry the tree (still decorated) to the living room.

It's our trip to AC for the Superbowl. I arrive with Matt, Dina, Ryan and a few others. Brian wasn't able to make it, but I can't remember why. We all check in to our rooms, walking back and forth between rooms talking and drinking. Eventually we start heading over to the casino. Brian calls me to tell me he's on his way, I'm so happy I actually start crying.

As we make our way down the hallway to the elevator, I run in front of everyone and jump in the elevator by myself. The reason nobody else gets in is because it's going up, but I'm too drunk to understand this.

The elevator goes up 1 floor, to a really fancy lobby - and 3 women who obviously work at the casino, get in. I get off, wait for the next elevator, and sure enough it's the same elevator with the same workers only a few more in there. I get back in, they ask where I'm going - so I say "I'm going down."

Post apocalyptic New York. There's a guy walking around the city streets just saying "M?" to people. Everyone's response is "mutant!" - at which point the guy shakes his head and goes to the next person passing by.

I see him do this to about a dozen people, when suddenly he walks up to me. "M?" he says. I respond "Monster?"

I got it right. I'm not sure what happened after that but the next thing I know I'm in a run down building being chased by 2 guys.

Brian, Jeefo and myself were walking around the mall. We decided to make a stop at Babbages to see if Diaz or Lucille were still working there. The store looks exactly the same as it did 15 years ago except the stock has been updated.

Diaz does not work there anymore, but Lucille is there. At first it's a woman who looks exactly like her, but her name is different and obviously doesn't know us. She goes in the back room, while Brian and Jeefo follow. I'm at the back of the store waiting for them to come out when suddenly I see a kid trying to steal something.

I grab him by the arm, find what he stole, and throw him to the ground. Fake Lucille, Brian, and Jeefo all come out to see what's going on. Fake Lucille is now real Lucille, still looking exactly the same but remembers me this time and thanks me for catching the shoplifter.