The Trashman Cometh

People often say they hope their deceased pet dog is chasing squirrels in doggy heaven… what did all of those squirrels do to deserve an afterlife of torment?

Dog heaven is also squirrel hell it’s a very efficient system.

i can’t stop fucking laughing at the thought of squirrels sinning so much in the mortal plane that they have to be sent to squirrel hell to atone

They know that the bird feeder isn’t meant for them

look at this shit. look. at. this. shit. it has fifteen thousand notes. what does it mean? why does a picture of the pin k panther with a to do lis that makes NO SENSE have fiFTEEN FUCKING NOTES. WHY. my mom could make better posts that this shit. what even. fuck tumblr.

looks like someone doesnt know what to do. to do. to do, to do, to do, to do, to dooooooooooooo, dodododododo

Daniel Radcliffe on a normal Tuesday morning walk

bring back Georgian-era sentence structure. fuck this single clause Hemingway bullshit; I want to string the reader along for pages, to link, however disparate, an endless array of actions using every form of punctuation I can imagine - even those I rarely use - and generally be as incoherent as possible (though it is to be said that this is for internet and casual use, and not for increasing the impenetrability of research papers, a far less noble goal than the one I proposed).

do kids these days know about grace kelly by mika

oh your penis is cumming? grow up

sorry for having a huge cock and correct opinions on everything. as if it’s my fault.

amulet that makes you think about trains

wow she really can play any role