tpom shipweek & angstweek

“Please tell me at least one of them knows,” Marlene begged no longer able to stay silent about the obvious pining that had been unfolding in front of them for the last hour. It had been cute at first, seeing Rico stare at Kowalski with heart eyes every time he thought the man wasn’t looking or paying attention. But it had become fascinating when Rico got up and Marlene caught Kowalski watching the other man with some degree of longing. Since then, it had become downright painful to see them steal glances and practically melt into each other’s spaces as the night went on.

“Nope,” Julien replied as he set a new drink next to her. “You’re more than welcome to join the betting pool.”

“There’s a betting pool?” The idea was tempting, but also how many people were seeing what she was seeing for one to exist. “Just how many people are aware of…that.”

“It’s a hefty pot so just about everyone who has ever seen them together,” Julien leaned against the bar top. “However, I am not allowed to join which is like totally unfair.”

“Because it’s a conflict of interest and you have an advantage.” Skipper cut in glaring at the other man as he rejoined Marlene at the bar.

“Ugh, Rico and I broke up like forever ago. You can’t keep it against me.”

“I can and I will as long as you two are still attached to the hip.”

“Wait, is that why you broke up?” Marlene turned away from where Rico and Kowalski were talking to Roger. “Does he not know?”

“Honestly, there is very little difference between a Rico who fully trusts you and a Rico who is in love with you,” Julien explained. They had both felt the shift in the relationship when mutually slipped out of a romantic love and into a platonic one. It still didn’t stop them from being flirty or touchy with each other, which certainly didn’t help the situation.  “But Sky Spirits only know if Rico can tell the difference at first. We’ve had some interesting conversations though, both of us wouldn’t mind taking a drink of that glass of water.”

“Which is exactly why you can’t be in the betting pool.” Skipper tried to block the mental images that followed Julien’s statement. “Honestly, the better question is, does Kowalski even know he’s not straight?”

“How would you know he’s not straight?” Marlene couldn’t help but argue. As painful as it was to watch the two, she couldn’t help but play the devil’s advocate. “I’ve only heard him pine over Doris.”

“There is one straight man on the team and he’s over there.” Skipper inclined his head to the other side of the room where Private was talking to Bada and Bing.  “Point is, both of them are completely oblivious, and it’s going to take one of them to nearly die to realize it.”

“I don’t think it has be to that extreme,” Marlene started but her attention has pulled back over to the pair when Kowalski’s laughter filled the air. She turned just in time to see the genius grab onto Rico as he cackled at something that had been said and Marlene was willing to bet that the flush in his face wasn’t just from his drinks. She turned back to Skipper and Julien shaking her head. “Maybe just some more liquor and then lock them in a room together.”

Skipper snorted at the suggestion and then sighed. “Unfortunately, no outside interferences. They have to figure it out for themselves, which is why I’m doubling down on a near-death confession.”

“I’m going to be less pessimistic and say they’ll figure it out between Christmas and New Years.”

“With or without alcohol?” Julien grinned and opened up an app on his phone.

Part of Skipper’s job was to notice things. Typically, this meant things like trip wires or snipers, and after years of constantly having to be aware of things, it meant that he noticed things even when his life wasn’t on the line.

Case and point: the rocks that had started to accumulate on the bookshelf in Marlene’s apartment.

It had started with one barely the size of a quarter, but it was such a rich blue that it caught his eye immediately.  A few weeks later another stone was also rather small, but a rich green with white bands. The next few that followed her decidedly plain compared to the first two. It wasn’t until he saw a glittering chunk of purple that he dared to ask.

“So, what with all the rocks Marlene?”

“Oh, it’s kind of embarrassing,” Marlene started, feeling her face flush as she watched Skipper examine her collection.

“Don’t tell me you’ve fallen victim to new-age hippy tactics.”

“No, nothing like that...or maybe a little like that but not in the way you think. It’s more the new age mindset of healing your inner child.”

“Explain.”

“As a kid I collected rocks, which I get is standard and not all that special, but I was obsessed and wanted to take all the rocks home. Especially if it was a type I hadn't seen before.  Not only would I fill my pockets, but I’d also cuff my pants to try to bring more home with me.”

“I bet that made every trip to the park fun.”

“My parents hated it. It’d be a full shakedown before I was allowed in the car or house. They let me some fossils on occasion to help curb the habit, which worked for a while, but I was still a menace. If I wasn’t allowed to go out and hunt rocks, then I was reading about them and became even more fascinated by the ones used for pigments. It was bad, for a while as a teenager, I kind of bought into the crystal energy mumbo jumbo.”

“Now that is embarassing considering you’d argue with me that ghosts don’t exist.”

“Because they don’t,” Marlene crossed her arms and glared at him.

“We’re not starting this again. Keep telling me what went wrong with your rock collection.”

“Long story short: High school girls are mean and my parents told me that if I wanted the bullying to stop then I needed to get rid of the rocks.” There was no hiding hurt in her voice. Even 20 odd years later it still stung that her parents had sided with her bullies instead of encouraging her to be herself. There had been harsher words exchanged that day, and sharp comments about geology being a waste of a career. “So, I tossed all of my collection outside and buried it.”

Skipper picked up the small blue stone and looked at Marlene with pride. “Good on you for rebelling against your parents.”

Marlene laughed a little at the comment. It was hardly her first act of rebellion at this point. Considering how unhappy her parents had been when she decided to pursue a degree in the arts and the outright disappointment when they caught a glimpse of the tattoo along her ribs.

“They’re used to it by now.”

“So, what’s this one?”

“Lapiz Lazuli: the original source for ultramarine and one of the very few sources for a naturally occurring blue.” Marlene gently took the stone from Skipper. “However, that’s not why I bought it.  I just so happened to be going to that ‘hippy’ you love.”

“Ugh, I loathe that place. You and Rixo always come back reeking of patchouli.”

Marlene rolled her eyes and continued her story as she put the stone back on the shelf. “Anyway, I wanted to restock some incense when I spotted it.  You were on the mission at the time, and I hadn’t seen your weeks and the second I saw the stone it reminded me of your eyes.”

Now Skipper could feel the tips of his ears burning, and he tried to play off the way his heart had started to jackhammer. “So, you started picking up pebbles because you missed me?”

“I mean, you are a penguin,” Marlene teased and leaned against him as she looked over various rocks and semi-precious stones. “But I also just missed my collection. Feels like I found a part of me that was missing. This time it’s just more meaningngful."

Skipper breathed through clenched teeth as Hans packed the wound in his thigh with gauze. He’d been lucky it hadn't nicked his femoral artery, but not lucky enough to avoid an injury overall.

Honestly, the bullet in his thigh was less concerning than the metallic taste coating his mouth and the fog that had settled like a curtain over his brain. When had it started to hurt to just breathe?

“Skipper, you have to stay awake.” Hans’ voice was desperate and he continued to pack the wound, but with a little more force than necessary. They had already called for back-up and it was well on it's way, but there was only so much time.

Skipper jolted awake but couldn't even remember closing his eyes. He tried to look at Hans but his vision was going blurry and he could now feel the blood coating his mouth.

“Tired,” he slurred and for a moment he could see the concern on Hans' face before his vision failed him again. Since when did Hans ever seem to worry about him?

“I know you are, but if you fall asleep now, then you’ll never get to see what our future together looks like.” Hans presses down on the wound with one hand and blindly reaches for Skippers with the other and tries not to flinch at how cold his fingers feel.

“Our future?” Last Skipper knew there wasn’t a future between the two of them. Hans had made that clear.

“I’ll admit I’m a little out of my element with this,” Kowalski admitted as he took the seat across from Doris. While part of him was elated to finally have a chance to talk to her, it was embarrassing to admit that he was struggling with organic chemistry.

Although it wasn’t nearly as humiliating as having to use the university’s tutoring services to pass English. He couldn’t complain too much about the ordeal since he gained a solid friend as a result. A friend who was still willing to help him on those stray literature classes he’d been ignoring since the first semester.

“No worries, organic chem is a completely different beast from your standard chemistry.” Doris offered a bright smile. “Honestly, I’ve only survived this long because my brother, Francis, was the TA for this professor last year and I access to all the extra lecture notes.”

“Not only is that an unfair advantage, but it’s borderline diabolical.” Kowalski could feel his nerves fading as they talked. He’d been crushing on Doris since orientation and their interactions, while fleeting, were consistent. Afterall, they both practically lived in the STEM part of the campus due to the overlap of their degrees.

“I actually tried to get him to join us, but he said it would be unethical to help,” Doris explained as they continued to set out their notes and textbooks.

“I could see how that might be a problem.”

“I could too, but I just wanted you to meet him. I think the two of you would get along swimmingly. He’s another science nerd like us.”

“Maybe I could meet him another time, when it’s not going to violate any ethics.”

Their meetings became a regular staple of Kowalski’s life. Although Francis never joined them, always citing the ethics of helping them. Kowalski was secretly grateful for the fact that it was just him and Doris, even if she almost constantly brought up her brother. Honestly, it was sweet in a way how much she admired him and wanted Kowalski to meet him. It was almost like she wanted to make her that Francis would approve of him and had had to admit that from what he'd been told the two of them did have a lot on common. Even if was strange that he hadn't just been getting to know Doris over the last few weeks. Which was fine because it made him confident that she was interested in him. He hadn't been completely oblivious to the stolen glances on her part for the way she'd try to hide her blush whenever their hands brushed accidently. 

 Of course his plan was to ask her out once they were at the end of the course, and that deadline was fast approaching. 

“So,” Kowalski started as Doris sat down, “our last project is just about done.”

“I know! It’s hard to believe that finals are in two weeks," Doris leaned back and fiddled with the small dolphin pendant she wore, "but it’s not like we have to stop hanging out. I've really liked getting to know you.”

Kowalski’s nerves increased tenfold at the thought of Doris wanting to still hang out with him outside of academic obligations. Once again he was proved right that Doris might be interested in something more than friendship.  It seemed that it would be now or never.

“That would be great." Kowalski leaned forward and decided that it was now or never. "Maybe we could plan to get drinks after finals to celebrate?”

“I'd love to! Plus you could finally meet Francis. He wouldn’t have an excuse not to hangout with us and whether he likes it not he did a lot to help us.”

“Oh,” Kowalski fumbled, “it’s not that I wouldn’t mind meeting your brother. It’s more that I was just hoping that it would just be the two of us. You know, like a date?”

“A date?” Doris echoed, confusion written across her face.

Kowalski flushed with embarrassment. He's never hear the end of it from Rico or Skipper once they found out and it wasn't like he couldn't tell them. Not after they'd been teasing him about his plans to ask Doris out for weeks. At least Private would have sympathy for him. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed that you’d be interested. Just forget about the whole date thing.”

“Wait, no I am interested! I just,” Doris stumbled over her words also growing crimson, “I just...kind of thought you were gay?”

 Kowalski suddenly wanted nothing more than to curl and die. He started at her in shock for a moment before slowly shaking head. “No, I’m straight.”

“Oh my god. I’m so sorry.” Doris covered ger face. “I’ve been trying to set you up with my brother this whole time.”

At least now it made sense why she'd been so adamant about having him meet Francis. And as embarrassed as Kowalski felt, he couldn't imagine how Doris was feeling. He placed a hand on her arm and hoped to save the moment by pushing through it. “It’s okay. "Can I at least ask what made you assume I wasn’t straight?”

“I don’t know exactly,” Doris muttered as she finally managed to look at Kowalski. “I just never saw you out with girls. But occasionally, I’d see you being all flirty with a really buff dude with a mohawk and piercings or another guy who should looks like model and I’m pretty sure was the MC for Pride last semester.”

Realization dawned on Kowalski once more and he started chuckling. Everything suddenly made sense and it was hard to not find the whole situation at least a little bit funny.

“You’re describing my roommate...well best friend at this point and his boyfriend. They think it’s funny to flirt with me because I’m the token straight of the group.” Kowalski explained and vaguely wondered how he had ended up in such a diverse group of friends. It was only slightly less baffling than how he had ended up friends with people in the arts.

“I’m so, so sorry.” Doris apologized again.

“It’s okay, it really is. Now in hindsight I can understand why you thought that. “

“Still, it was rude of me to just assume.”

“How about you let me take you to make up for it?”

“I swear you just came back from a mission.” Marlene hoped her voice had come out as light and playful. A contrast to the acidic burn that ignited in her chest the second Skipper mentioned leaving again.

“Nothing confirmed yet, but there’s a good chance we’ll be called.”

Now Marlene felt her throat grow tight. Admittedly she was used to Skipper’s flippant tones, but lately it had been getting to her. The causal disregard of peace and security for honor and duty felt different this time.

“You’ve hardly been back a week.”

Now the acid seeped through and looked away for a moment ashamed. Technically they weren't anything other than friends, even if Skipper would scoff a little and claim that a friend was just an enemy that hadn't attacked you yet. Still, something had seemed to be blossoming between them and she was allowed to feel hurt. Allowed to be worried, 

Skipper shrugged, his coffee sloshing dangerously close to the edge. “Sometimes it just works that way. Honestly, I’m just glad that if we had to go back out, we would be able to be sent out. That’s better than the alternative.”

Marlene couldn’t hide her wince now remembering the last time the team had been grounded. The last time Skipper had been grounded.

At much as she hated it, Skipper was right. It was better than the alternative.

“Hey,” Skipper leaned across the table setting his mug down so he could rest his hands over hers. It sent against his gruff exterior, revealing a softness that few had seen. “I could get a call tomorrow that Hans didn't botch the whole thing, and we are granted a well-deserved vacation. It's not as if I want to to just up a leave again.”

“If anyone is going to pull off a small miracle like that it would be you.” Marlene could feel a heat rise to her cheeks. “I still worry.”