marnie (sprout🌱), 25+, lesbian, they/she. mdni. personal + occasional writing blog for self shipping
NO terfs, racists, homophobes, transphobes, zionists.
-mainly hoyoverse and love&deepspace! with animanga sprinkled in >:3
-i reblog from everything i like!!
-i am sharing. i love to talk about self ships and common love of characters. if that’s an issue pls don’t follow me.
-no lesbophobes pls i don’t care what u think abt my comphet
-very slow writing updates i am an adult with a job
-i believe in making that grown man cry (physically and emotionally)
-any sex i write about is gay sex bc i am gay. congrats on your gay sex
not proship not anti but a secret third thing (employed)
i will not write noncon, underage, incest, or severely abusive dynamics. it also won’t appear on my blog, just personal preference and for my own wellbeing! stay safe💕
i will filter out any tags that i don’t vibe with. if it’s not for me i just won’t interact.
i will probably write gore, age-gap (by way of mythical creatures), bdsm, dubcon (alcohol, manipulation, potions;; nothing crazy), murder and other topics that could be seen as ‘dark content’. it will be tagged. use your best judgement on what makes you comfortable!
i will not participate in any kind of shipping drama. i am too old and tired.
the block button is free and i genuinely mean this with kindness. if anything i say or write makes you upset, feel free to reach out to me, or feel free to block me. your comfort and experience on this website is just as important as my own.
do not plagiarize or feed any of my writing into ai
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
okay. how do I put this. if you approach interactions with strangers as if the vast majority of them are unbearable losers who aren't worth your time, you will find yourself not liking most of the people you meet because you'll be looking for any excuse to write them off as unbearable losers. I know this is hard to hear but sometimes the problem is you.
zhongli and flins.... the type of men who would have absolutely no issues going down on his knees before asking if you'll allow them to help you into your shoes prior to going out. they make it a habit to do so, actually. tapping the shoe upside-down first to remove any debris, slipping your feet ever so gently into the footwear, lacing up and/or tightening any straps that needs to be fastened... and the last touch, of course, is the soft kiss on your knee followed by a gentle (and proud) “all done, dearest.” 𑣲
got a crick in my neck and a frog in my throat and a chip on my shoulder and a stick up my ass and now you're gonna stand there puttin words in my mouth? haven't I been through enough?
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
Warnings: fem! reader, switch! Varka, switch! reader, edging, Shibari, breeding kink/ creampie, overstimulation, teasing, p in v sex, unprotected sex, praise kink, dacryphilia, doggy style, size kink, oral (f! receiving), by continuing to scroll past this point, you've agreed to read the content below!
Masterlist
Notes: So I'm kinda back? Not even lying when I say that half of this was written while I was half asleep or sleep deprived. No inbetween, so it's kinda ass in my opinion. Anyways, enjoy!
Grand Master Varka had been away from Mondstadt, away from his homeland, away from you for four and a half years. You had been waiting for him, waiting even as rumors spread that he could die at any time while in Nod-Krai, that he'd left you for another woman while abroad. You didn't believe those rumors, even when his letters stopped coming nearly as frequently after he had arrived in Nod-Krai. You knew his love for you ran deeper than the oceans that separated the two of you, stretched further than the lands between you, was stronger than the force of himself and his men tenfold. Loyalty was something he'd been taught early on by the people he'd looked up to in life. The very thought of infidelity never once crossed his mind when he had you.
Varka had arrived with the last of the expeditionary forces late at night, trudging his way to his house, his home, his wife. Fuck, he missed you so damn much. Four and a half years he'd yearned for you, yearned to hear your voice, your laughter, see your smile, tug you close to him and hold you for the next week.
Mercifully enough for him, he had a week before he was required to return to his post as Grand Master. One week of rest. One week of spending time with you.
One week of fucking you within an inch of your life if you'd let him have you that much.
While abroad on previous expeditions, Varka had met a great many people and learned a great many things about their culture. Inazuma in particular had been a place he'd enjoyed, given the many islands and the great scenery. He'd also learned of the art of Shibari there after a few too many drinks with a man who'd also been married for a while. He didn't think that tying someone up in the bedroom was a fair thing to do, but then again he was relatively vanilla when it came to his sex life with you. You two didn't often try new things in the bedroom, but he figured he'd at least get some of the silk bindings he saw at a store while in Inazuma City and bring it up to you whenever the time was right.
And now, four and a half years after leaving for Nod-Krai, what he wanted more than anything was a long, hot shower and a nice, long night of sleep.
You'd been waiting for him when he got there. His visits home had been sporadic since his initial return to Mondstadt, when he'd been helping escort the remaining dregs of the Knights of Favonius Expeditionary Force back to Mondstadt.
But tonight, furthermore for the week, he was yours.
The silk was gentle on his wrists as you secured his hands to the headboard of your shared bed. Such a large man like Varka tended to be seen as imposing, but it was quite different here now that you had him tied to the bed. He had whined, of course, about how he'd wanted you to be the one tied up, but you were more than happy to remind him that you'd be the one doing the work tonight, which went against the usual power dynamics between you and him. You had a feeling you'd probably be eating those words later, but for now, you let yourself enjoy the view of him tied up and restrained in silk while naked.
“Is something the matter, my dear?” You asked as your finger gently lifted his chin. You weren't that cruel, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't intend to tease him for a bit.
“I- fuck, this isn't fair. I should be the one doing this to you.” He grumbled, though his words held no real heat. His gaze trailed down your figure, down the scars that mapped your flesh, the same ones his hands currently ached to touch. He'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy the switch in power dynamics, but he was a giving lover and couldn't help but want to lavish you with attention, which he couldn't really do as easily whilst tied up like this.
His legs were spread. The tip of him was already flushed a shade of red that matched his cheeks. It was quite a sight to your eyes, one you appreciated most definitely. The light blue silk ropes matched his eyes, which stared up at your face after roaming your body with a reverence even gods seldom received from their most loyal acolytes.
“I do wonder how they'd view you if they knew you were willing to do this for me.” You said as you gently grasped his jaw. His breathing was shallow, his gaze almost pleading, silently begging you to just touch him.
“You- oh you're cruel.” He grunted, giving an almost rasped chuckle. His hands strained against the ropes as he felt you slide down his chest toward his navel. He was pressed against the curve of your ass now, and so hard it almost hurt.
“Honestly, I quite like seeing you like this. It's so rare for you to lay there and take it like a good boy. Seems I'll just have to force you to relax if I want you to.” You mused as your hand traced down his chest to his stomach, watching his stomach muscles and his abs tense from the feathery touches. His eyes fluttered closed.
“Hhh- please, don't be like this. I've been gone for four and a half years and I already wanted to bend you over the nearest counter when I came in earlier. I've been on the road for a week just getting back here. You gotta give me something, please.” He pleaded finally.
You gave a dramatic sigh before leaning forward to press your lips against his.
“I suppose I can indulge you.” You replied as you pulled back, your hand snaking down between his legs as you grasped the base of him gently but firmly, smirking slightly as you heard his breath hitch and watched him squeeze his eyes shut.
“Don't tell me that's all you can handle, Varka. We've got a long night ahead of us.” You cooed, your tone dripping with the promise of exquisite torture.
Your hand moved just fast enough to provide him with the friction he craved, but slowly enough to keep him just on the brink. He tried to buck his hips, to which you pinned them down with a strength he frequently forgot you possessed. Your stature belied your strength, something you often used to your advantage both in and out of the bedroom.
“Stay still and take it, or I'll go slower.” You gently chided. He was panting, soft groans leaving him as he tried not to move too much.
“Sh-shit, hah- please lemme have you. I- fuck I'll do anything, just please.” His voice had raised a little in pitch, and he looked desperate.
You clicked your tongue. “So impatient. Really, I've half the mind to stop completely.” You said, smirking as he went rigid. He watched with a hungry gaze as you pressed your thumb against the tip, rubbing hard circles into the sensitive flesh as he cursed under his breath.
“But you're lucky I'm willing to spoil you so much. You have been gone for quite a long while, my love. I suppose further denying you would be rather cruel.” You said as you pulled your hand off of him. He looked frazzled, his control fraying slightly at the edges.
When you finally sank down on him, he let out a breathless groan, pressing his hips up into yours impossibly closer even after you'd fully seated yourself on him. He was decently large, leaving you feeling pleasantly full every time you two fucked. With a slightly shuddery breath after taking a minute to adjust to the delicious stretch, you slowly started rocking your hips against his, watching his hands pull against the silk binding his wrists to the headboard. What he wouldn't give to grab the fat of your ass right now and fuck you into the mattress himself. His eyes were heavy lidded, watching you and only you. You were like a goddess, beautiful in every way as he gazed up at you whilst you rode him slowly. The soft, velvety walls of your cunt squeezed him just right, practically choking the length of him as you moved nice and slowly.
“‘S so beautiful.” He slurred slightly, panting heavily as you moved. He would stare at you forever if he could. He said as much rather often, always one to be vocal when it came to his love for you.
Despite the absolutely raunchy position you two were in, your cheeks tinted red at his words, spoken so sincerely as he groaned beneath you. You moved a little faster now, lifting your hips as his own chased yours desperately.
He had strained his muscles to keep his hips lifted, his back arched up slightly. His muscles burned pleasantly as he felt the pleasure start to coil in his lower stomach.
“Does it feel good?” You murmured softly, your hands on his chest as he turned his head to the side and closed his eyes, struggling somewhat to coherently answer your question. He gave a strangled groan as you swiveled your hips against his whilst fully seated on him, before he choked out a pathetic sounding “yes” in response.
“I- oh fuck I'm close, jus’ just a little more.” He breathed. The coil in his lower belly drew impossibly tighter as he bucked his hips up into yours, wanting you to finish first. His eyes rolled back as his head fell back against the pillows when you squeezed tight around him as you came, hips stuttering against your own as that coil deep within him snapped. He came hard, babbling your name and whatever sweet words his lust-addled mind could conjure up.
“Hahhhh- fuck- nh-” he grunted softly as he bucked his hips against yours, groaning softly as he felt you milking him for all he was worth, your hips rolling against his as he spilled heavily into you.
He panted as your hips stilled against his, looking up at the ceiling with glassy eyes filled with such pretty tears.
Your eyes widened a little as you noticed the tears in his eyes.
“You alright, big guy?” You asked after giving him a few minutes to ride out his own high and calm down. When he nodded his head, you started moving again, watching as he once again squeezed his eyes shut and writhed beneath you.
“Wait- shit- what're you… what're you doing?” He grunted. Those teary blue eyes met yours as he spoke with a slight strain in his voice.
“Oh you thought we were done for the night? No, no, we're far from done, Grand Master.” You replied.
“Fuck, c’mon lady, I need a break for Archons sakes. Gonna pass out if you keep this up.” He panted.
“You wanna tap out? You know the safe word.” You said.
When he didn't say it and instead stared up at you, pupils blown wide. You smiled smugly.
“As I thought.” You said as you started moving again.
He managed to last until you were sated, but the two other orgasms you'd wrenched from his already sensitive body, coupled with the exhaustion he'd felt since he had arrived home, had him absolutely boneless and achy as you carefully untied his wrists from the headboard and made sure that there weren't any marks where he'd tugged the restraints.
“Does anything hurt?” You asked as you folded up the silk bindings and set them aside before continuing to check him over just in case you missed anything. Varka shook his head as he looked at you, a lazy smile on his lips as you tended to him. He painted quite a lovely picture like this. He was exhausted, laying back with his arms splayed out and his head tipped back against the pillow as you cleaned the two of you up with a warm, wet cloth you'd briefly gone to the washroom to prepare after you had pulled off of him. The blond tresses of his hair stuck to his sweaty forehead, his eyes were closed, and his lower half was barely covered by the sheets after you'd cleaned up.
Once you got back in the bed with him, Varka wasted no time tugging you close to his chest and burying his face in your neck. His arms wrapped firmly around your middle as he breathed you in. He rolled onto his side whilst keeping you close to him, looking at you.
“When I've rested properly, it's your turn, come sunrise tomorrow. I hope you don't have any plans other than staying in this bed.” He said as he looked at you.
“Yeah, okay, says the one whose legs are shaking.” You retorted as you guided him to lay his head on your chest. You once again had a feeling you'd be eating those words tomorrow, but given your own exhaustion, you cared very little.
“You'll see.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~
The sun had long since risen when the two of you woke up late the next morning. It was very nearly noon by the time Varka opened his eyes, his body practically squishing yours against the mattress.
“Okay, get off, you've got me pinned against the bed, you oaf.” You grumbled.
“Eh, that was the plan anyways.” He said as he sat up in bed beside you. In the clear light of late morning, you saw that his wrists, mercifully, had no red marks.
“Glad to see that you didn't tug hard enough against the restraints to leave any marks on yourself.” You said as you looked up at him. The sheets pooled around his waist as he looked at you whilst you laid back on your pillow beside him, oblivious to the way he eyed the silk bindings that sat on your bedside table. He hummed softly. Your eyelids had just fluttered closed again when he rolled you over and pinned your wrists behind your back. You snapped at him as your eyes shot open.
“Hey- I-”
“Ah-ah, I told you it was your turn today.” He said. “If you'll have me.”
He was giving you an out. If you didn't want to do this, you didn't have to.
But the thought of you getting your insides rearranged the fun way was simply too good to pass up, and he was rather finely attuned to your needs. If it was truly too much, he'd stop.
“Damn, you look good in my color.” He said as he looked at you, now wrapped up in silk. Your wrists were tied carefully behind your back, the silk swirled up your arms and over your shoulders to cross around your chest before snaking down to tie on either side at your thighs. He'd checked with you every step of the way when tying it to make sure that you were comfortable, just as you'd done with him the previous night.
You had your head turned to the side as you lay on your stomach, face down, ass up. Your face, ears, and shoulders were tinted red as you looked at him.
“Look at you, so pretty. Gonna ruin you, make it to where you can't walk when I'm done. You want that?” He asked as he looked at you. His eyes now held a sharpness they hadn't had last night, his previous exhaustion all but gone as he met your gaze. You couldn't help but look away after he kept staring.
“Uh-uh, look at me. I wanna see you, wanna see that pretty face. Been missing you for four and a half years.” He coaxed as he looked at you.
His body was molded for battle, for fighting against evil and defending his people from the dangers that lurked beyond the relative safety of Mondstadt’s main city's walls. His hands were calloused from swordsmanship, scarred from the injuries he'd sustained over his years as not only Grand Master of the Knights of Favonius, but also from his time on that expedition and the previous ones abroad. Those hands had taken lives, had saved lives, had helped others and hurt others, namely those who had dared to insinuate that he was a man of little honor who wouldn't fight to ensure the safety of his nation and his soldiers. Every scar was a different story.
And it was those hands that brought you plenty of pleasure as he nudged your legs open and found you were already wet, lower lips glistening with need.
“Look at her, already soaked. Is this all for me?” He asked as he sank his middle finger into you, watching your breath catch. You nodded wordlessly as your face reddened further from embarrassment.
“She looks so good. I just… just want a small taste.” He grunted, rolling you over as he pulled his middle finger out and tossed your legs over his shoulders. His mouth was on you almost immediately, sucking your clit as he slid his middle and ring fingers into your already aching cunt.
You whined softly as he feasted on you, one hand grabbing your thigh and the other between your legs as he fingered you open slowly. Your thighs tried to squeeze his head, but he held them open, lapping at you like a fine glass of wine. If he could get drunk off of you, he absolutely would. Didn't mean he'd stop trying, especially now as he crooked his fingers to press them against that spongy spot inside of you that made you writhe in pleasure, eyes rolling back as soft whines and needy noises left your lips. You felt the pressure start to coil in your lower belly, and when you made that clear to him, he just moved his fingers faster knowing damn well you couldn't move your hands to force him to pull his head away.
The coil snapped and you whined loudly as he lapped at you to help you ride out your high. He eventually pulled his face away, chin glistening with your arousal as he licked his lips and sucked his fingers clean. Smug bastard.
He sank his middle and ring fingers back into you, moving his hand slowly as the callouses rubbed deliciously against the velvety walls of your cunt. His hands, so rough and scarred, were infinitely gentle as he touched you. His mouth, which often called out commands to his men and maintained order by his words, now whispered sweet things to you as he pleasured you.
“Wanted to send you way more letters, but I had so little time while I was in Nod-Krai. That isn't fair to you, is it?” He asked as he ground his palm against your clit. You shook your head, biting your lower lip as the pressure started to build again.
“Varka, please.” You whispered, squirming a little against the silk. You wanted him. Not his fingers, not his mouth, him.
“Please what? You gotta be specific.” He coaxed as he felt you squeeze around his fingers.
“Please don't tease me anymore. I haven't had you in ages.” You murmured.
“Funny, when I begged last night, it took you longer than this to respond.” He said as he raised an eyebrow.
You gave a soft little whine in response to his words and he couldn't help but chuckle softly, easing his fingers out of you and rolling you over onto your stomach again as he once more lifted your ass. His free hand smoothed over your skin, gently pushing your chest against the mattress. He couldn't deny you if he wanted to, not for very long at least.
He slowly sank into you, his hands gentle as they slid to your hips to keep you in place. He watched your hands strain against the ties, tugging hard as a shuddering half whine left you. He sank all the way to the hilt, holding you still and giving you a minute. He watched you pant beneath him, head against the pillow. Archons, how was he still this good? It was almost embarrassing how badly you'd needed this.
He slowly drew his hips back, watching you squirm slightly with a small sense of satisfaction at the fact that you were this desperate already, before he sank back into you to give you that friction and fullness you had craved while he'd been gone. He watched you squirm from the first few thrusts, from the way he kissed your cervix with every gentle buck of his hips. It was intoxicating, all of it. One calloused hand snaked between your thighs and he grunted softly as he rubbed your clit, feeling the squeeeze as his hips stuttered just a little, dragging a soft whine from you as he kept moving.
“There it is. Looks like she missed me, huh?” He said as he kept you steady, his hips moving at just the right pace to not overwhelm you too fast.
“She's certainly droolin’ enough to show she missed me.” He said as he looked between the two of you. You were already a mess under him, thighs already slick with need because you hadn't had this in years. It felt like last night wasn't enough, either. It felt like you needed more to be sated.
How quickly he relearned what made you tick. It was a whirlwind of sensation that hit you as he kept his hips steady and firm as he moved, slowing whenever you got close to your end.
“Varka- Varka, please…” You gasped as he pulled back to make his thrusts shallower for the nth time that evening.
“Come on, jus’ one more. You can do that f’ me, can't ya?” He asked, his voice a low whisper in your ear. You couldn't help but nod, his hips picking up pace again as he dragged a low whine from you.
This time, he didn't pull back. This time, he didn't slow down. He kept you steady as he kept moving, grunting softly as he felt you squeeze around him. The coil in your lower stomach felt impossibly tight. You buried your face in the pillow, eyes rolling back as your orgasm washed over you in waves. Your thighs shook as you rode it out, and you couldn't help the sigh of relief as he fucked you through it.
“Easy, ‘m close.” He murmured in your ear, picking up the pace to chase his own release while helping you ride out the waves of your own. He gave a few more deep thrusts before pressing his hips flush to yours as he came, face buried in your neck as he held your hips still to keep you from squirming. You were exhausted by the time he pulled out slowly.
“Hhh… Varka, I-”
“I know.” He murmured, his hands reaching for the bindings and untying you carefully. Once you were free and he'd tossed them aside, he gently picked you up and carried you to the bathroom adjacent to your bedroom.
The water was warm as he filled the bath, setting you down inside the tub once it was full.
“I'm gonna let you soak for a bit while I clean things up, okay?” He asked as he cupped your cheek with his hand. He smiled when you gave a tired nod, feeling his lips against yours as he kissed you.
“I'll be back, you just relax.” He said as he left.
While you were resting in the tub, your strained muscles loosening and relaxing in the warm water, Varka changed the sheets on your bed and put away the bindings. He peeked his head back in the bathroom and saw you leaning against the rim of the tub, eyes pleasantly closed as you relaxed.
“Do you want anything to eat?” He asked from the doorway, receiving a quiet “no” in response. “Anything to drink?” He asked a few seconds later, and you nodded this time. He went and grabbed a couple glasses of water and set them on a tray that he then set down beside the bath, before he got in the bath with you and handed one of them to you, guiding you to lay back against him.
He had taken care to not let the bindings leave any marks on you, either, as you'd done for him. He chose to massage the stiffness from your shoulders as you relaxed, given he loved the soft sigh you gave as his hands massaged the tension from your shoulders and back.
“Thanks.” Came your tired voice as you looked back at him.
“No need to thank me, just taking care of you. You always worry about me, so I've gotta make sure you're alright as well.” He said as he rested his chin atop your head.
“I'm glad you're home.” You said.
“I'm glad to be home. Do you know how much I missed you? I couldn't hold you while I was out on that expedition. It was torture, I tell you.” He said dramatically, smiling as you chuckled.
“Well, I can't help but agree with that. It was rather lonely here at the house by myself.” You said as you pressed yourself impossibly closer to him as he grabbed some soap and started cleaning you up.
He made sure to wash your hair with the shampoo you liked, massaging it into your scalp and making sure it lathered before he took care of his hair as well while you washed it out of your hair. He then conditioned it, letting it sit while he talked about all the things he missed while he was gone on that expedition. He missed waking up next to you, brushing your hair from your face, sleeping with you in his arms, and so many more smaller things.
“I even missed it when you nagged me about returning to headquarters to continue my paperwork.” He said after washing the conditioner from your hair, earning himself a smirk from you.
“Oh I'm sure you'll be eating those words soon enough, my love.” You said as you reached up to place a hand against his cheek.
“Mmm… nah, not if it means I get to hear your voice. I like your voice too much, even when you're annoyed with me.” He said as he turned his head and kissed your palm.
By this time, the water was getting cold. Varka got up and out of the water, grabbing a towel and the now empty water glass and setting the glass aside before drying you off and getting you under the covers. He dried himself off as well after he'd grabbed a separate towel, and got under the covers with you.
“I take it you'll be in Mondstadt for a while yet?” You asked as you snuggled up to him.
“Yeah, I don't want to leave again. I'm exhausted after this past expedition, and I missed so much time with you. I don't want to spend more time away from you, at least not for a good long while.” He said, drawing you to him and laying on his back with you resting against his chest. You looked up at him, at this man who had loved you for so many years, who had carried your love with him while he was away, who had come back to you safely, and you couldn't help pushing yourself up and cupping his face in your hands.
“I love you.” You whispered.
He looked up at you as you hovered over him, a smile on his face, and you swore his eyes looked almost teary.
“I love you too.” He whispered back, holding you close to him.
“But for now, I think I speak for both of us when I say that I'm exhausted. We can wake up later and do something then, but I've got a whole week to be lazy and spend time with you before going back to the Knights.” He said as he rolled onto his side and tugged you close, arms around your lower back as he rested his forehead against yours. He closed his eyes and let sleep claim him.
You smiled, kissing him once more.
“Agreed. Sleep well, my love.” You said, closing your eyes and falling asleep soon after, peacefully in his arms once more.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
You gotta be able to take an L if your moral and ethical belief systems are to be capable of guiding you. Otherwise you just have an idealized self where you get really mad and scared when anyone points out it isn't actually you. How the fuck are you gonna walk the walk if you can't handle being told when you are not, in fact, actually walking it
you cannot just socially transition into being a good person you are going to have to settle for being a messy human being who has to try and fail and keep trying to get better like everyone else. yeah even when it's embarassing and sucks for you a lot.