lucky !

pulling yourself up by your strap-on or whatever they say

you're so pretty. like, you're absolutely gorgeous. have you thought about tidying your room slightly to temporarily but significantly increase your quality of life? you are so beautiful

my devoted but dangerously unstable knight will be hearing about this

nuanced fortune to you, traveller

may all kinds of shit happen

oh sure blame the guy whose fault it is

was so well-behaved the dentist let me put my fingers in his mouth too

unpopular opinion but if I was a woman and I started dating a man and he kept talking about how he had a crazy ex who was just so crazy and hellbent on destroying his life, I’d just stop seeing him. either he is a raging misogynist and an abuser or she is really a problem and I don’t need that drama in my life. helping him harass and degrade her would not be an option in that scenario.

what do you mean my childhood affected me

did you seriously just let it linger

dude i had to

you've met me at a very "yeah i'm trying to work on that" time in my life

i hate the word spicy can we bring back calling things erotic

rolling up to Wendy's to get an erotic chicken sandwich