The Nest

this is the first time I've drawn in about four years or so 🥹 I don't remember how to draw hands

For years, I blamed it on a lack of inspiration to start writing.

No, I just needed an author like you to begin delving into the characters psychologically.

Understanding how a person's mind works, with all its traumas, uncertainties, and fears, is something that slips through my fingers, and few people write as well as you.

If it's not a secret, how do you do it? I never thought someone else's work could stick in my head like that, making me reflect on actions and consequences, fears and shame, denial and understanding. I have so many questions for myself that I'm still searching for answers and finding them.

I distract myself from my anxious thoughts by writing, testing how this or that course of events would work. For me, this is a huge, painstaking task.

I'm curious, what inspires you and helps you write?

I’m flattered that my writing has helped you with yours. I never thought it could have an impact on someone aha.

I don’t have some big, grandiose answer to what inspires me, unfortunately. For the past few months I haven’t really had much motivation to write and have had some bad writers block, which is why I’ve fallen off the weekly updates I was managing to do before. I was able to do those mainly because I had written so far ahead of what was published, so even though my writing fell off, I still had chapters to post. But now what I have already written and the posted chapters have caught up to one another.

I can’t say I was inspired by anything in particular. For EtS, it was the response of the fandom that had me write and write and write. I was like a machine during the course of that fic and well into WATN. So I guess the fandom inspired me to keep writing.

In terms of how I came up with the ideas, there was no inspiration. For EtS I was just doing some chores at home and the thought of “what if Rumi was mute?” came to me. I then sat down and wrote out a rough plan. Then I kept writing.

For WATN, two scenes came to me late at night. So again I sat down and I wrote out the two scenes, then I planned the fic around them. Both of these scenes are the next two chapters of the fic waiting to be finished writing and posted. However, because of how much the fic has changed since I wrote these two scenes, I’m having to rework them to fit the new narrative.

For example: The fic was originally planned to be 15 chapters. I quickly realised while writing that it wasn’t possible to tell the story effectively in that many chapters. (We are now on chapter 20 and (SPOILER ALERT) Rumi has only just kissed Zoey)

Zoey also wasn’t supposed to be as much as a character in it as she now is. She was literally just meant to be the catalyst that starts the whole plot off, be Mira’s girlfriend and cause havoc.

She is still Mira’s menace of a girlfriend ofc, but she now has a backstory and a plot line that is entirely separate from Rumira. That wasn’t in the original plan. It flowed out of me when I started writing Zoey’s first POV chapter.

I don’t know what possessed me to decide Rumi was engaged to Jinu and that she and Mira had an unspoken love. It just came to me and I thought it would be interesting to explore how they got to this point (the point of the two scenes that came to me)

In terms of what helps me: As mentioned before, EtS was very much helped by the fandom response. I was so excited for the readers to see what happens next and what their responses would be. I still am! Which is what is making this writers block so frustrating. I know what needs to happen but the words just aren’t coming.

Music helped me a lot with WATN. I would be listening to a song and be like “this is so Mira/Rumi/Zoey in WATN coded” so often that I ended up making an entire playlist filled with songs that fit them as characters and the vibe of the fic. So when I’m writing a chapter, I usually have that playlist on to help me get into the headspace.

In terms of the psychology of the characters, I literally just think about how I would react if I were them. Rumi in EtS was easiest because I based a lot of her off of myself, especially when it came to the chapters that show her depression, or her anxiety around her body etc.

WATN was trickier in a sense because Ive never been in this specific situation before, but I like to think I’m an empathetic person so I was able to tap into their emotions etc. Oddly, Mira has been the easiest to write because I have been in the situation where there’s this odd unspoken thing between me and a “straight friend” (the difference here being that Rumi actually does love Mira back) so I could draw from how I felt during that time in my life to write Mira’s POV.

so yeah, there’s no big, oh I was inspired by this book, or this author etc. The ideas literally just came to me as I was going about my day. Like, even the half cooked idea I have for my next fic I may or may not write came to me at like 4am when I couldn’t sleep.

And what helps me write? Currently nothing lmao because I have writers block. But previously it was fandom response, music and the fact I just had to get these words down on to a page.

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Zoey

Zoey lives with the weight of her past—which torments her every day—, and a tremendous sense of inferiority as well. She hasn't truly lived for a long time—she's been surviving her days, dragging herself along, stopping herself from ending her own suffering to avoid hurting the only person she has left.

Apollo kept her alive, pushing away those self-deprecating thoughts that so disturbed Zoey's mind every day.

But her past remains a weight on Zoey's shoulders. Every time memories return vividly to her mind, Zoey wants to forget. She wishes she could forget it all. She wishes she wasn't a burden or a person who brings misfortune wherever she goes, but that seems to define her as a person.

She was guilty of everything that ever happened to her, after all. She brought every ounce of misery into her own life simply by existing. And every day she reviews the decisions she made and blames herself for acting that way.

She simply fails to understand and respect herself. Zoey has forgotten she was a child back then. And the guilt only seems to grow stronger each day inside her, corroding her from the inside out.

She feels so inferior that she doesn't realize what her mere presence is capable of doing.

Unconsciously, even with all that pain weighing on her, she hasn't stopped illuminating every place she goes. She doesn't know how she's able to encourage people to keep trying. She doesn’t know how much the way she keeps her warm aura emanating helps hearts that need it. She doesn’t know that she is a sun.

Maybe someday she could forgive that little girl who so desperately needs a hug—that little one who kept crying over the loss of her parents, who keeps blaming herself for the wounds on her grandparents' and little brother's bodies the night before she ran away.

All little Zoey needs is a hug.

And all Zoey needs is someone who will accept her even with all the pain and excessive worries of that restless mind.

All Zoey needs is a home.

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Mira

Mira hates herself a little for her arrogance.

But she also doesn't like to give in.

She doesn't want to be an easy victim. She doesn't want people to think she's fragile and sweet. No. She's not an idiot, she can't let anyone get close. She doesn't need anyone. Mira is enough on her own.

Mira doesn't need gods. She doesn't need Aphrodite or that damn charm and blessing. And most importantly of all, she doesn't need love.

Holding grudges has been a big problem since she ran away from home. Mira can't forgive. She prefers to keep the lump in her throat and the pain it causes. She prefers to live with it rather than give other people an opening to hurt her again. Prefers to be called mean and nonchalant than to open up to someone again.

Even though her heart still calls out for Rumi. Even though every time Mira sees her at the lake she wants to approach her, be comforted, and say she's sorry and wants to talk about what happened…

She doesn't do it.

And every time Mira considers changing that, even when she thinks about overcoming and forgiving, she remembers the pain. How painful it was to deal with what had already happened. She doesn't want to have to heal another pain. Not when she hasn't even healed those open wounds in her fragile heart.

And although Zoey was able to warm that jagged heart, Mira can't allow herself to open up to it. She tries to remember that she doesn't need anyone. That she doesn't need love.

But Mira also knows that her heart yearns for Zoey and Rumi with every beat.

Maybe someday she'll learn to forgive and let go.

But Mira would avoid that day with all the strength she can muster.

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Rumi

Rumi used to suffer from the strength of her loyalty. She knew herself well enough to know that she would let the world and Olympus burn if it meant the life of someone she loved.

And she knew she would face any monsters for the people she loved.

But she had already lost everyone who mattered to her.

Every day that pain grew.

And when she lost herself—after that time she was punished by Zeus and suffered wounds beyond the physical—Rumi had forgotten who she was.

Fury consumed her. And the grudges she harbors against the gods are unleashed against everything and everyone who bothers her. Whether it is a child asking for help with equipment, a half-sibling calling her to discuss combat strategies, or a satyr asking her for a favor, Rumi responds to all of them the same way she responds to one of the few gods who still dare to ask her for a quest.

With arrogance. Being rude. Without feelings.

She isn't interested anymore. She doesn't care. She doesn't want to.

Rumi isn't the same person anymore. Just a tired and angry version, too disillusioned to care about anything.

And although she has been changed so much by grief, she still strives to keep the promises she made to the people she lost. She still wants to make sure that the Cabin 5 continues to maintain its glory, as she had promised herself when she took the position that once belonged to Jinu as their head counselor. Rumi struggles to keep her prayers constant, for she had promised Hestia and Hades that she would never stop thanking them for everything they had done for her and the people she loved.

But Rumi hates herself for not fulfilling the only lesson that reminds her of her mothers.

She could still hear Miyeong and Celine telling her that she should be kind and strong.

But Rumi doesn't want to be strong.

And she is exhausted from being kind.

She just wants a little peace. She wants to be able to sleep without being tormented by nightmares. She wants to be able to wake up without fearing an invasion at the camp.

Rumi just wants a home.

A home she lost the moment Mira left her. A home that could no longer exist, and she couldn't even blame the gods for it. She only blames herself.

And now, whenever she is guided to that sweet voice that had recently begun to sound every morning at the lake, Rumi sees Mira with her.

With Zoey.

Zoey and that smile that irritates her so much. Zoey and that damned voice that charms the other campers. Zoey and that excess of positivity that pisses her to her bones.

Rumi is aware that she will die soon if she doesn't control her own anger and learn to forget those grudges.

Ryu Rumi, daughter of Ares

Right next to the jar, Mira placed some bills along with some coins, and she crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes as she looked at her wife.

Rumi had been swearing a lot in front of Yuna ever since she learned to use swear words, and Mira wanted to avoid it so that Rumi wouldn't end up talking like that even outside the house, or worse, inside the house when their nieces and nephews were visiting. Yuna is old enough to understand that she shouldn't swear, but the younger ones would probably repeat everything they would learn and say it in the middle of breakfast as if it were a good morning wish.

After Rumi stared at her in doubt for a long time since Mira had placed the money and the jar on the table, Mira uncrossed her arms and, pointing to the money first, began to explain.

"This is your allowance, and this is a swear jar. Every time you swear, you owe a coin to the swear jar. And every fucking time you tear your clothes to shift into a wolf, you owe a bill. Understood?" Mira may have added the second rule at that very instant when she remembered all the clothes Rumi had been destroying lately.

Rumi paused to think about the instructions her mate had given her, all quite clear to her, of course. She knew what swear words were and she knew what money was, so it was easy to fit the information into a little box in her mind.

"Understood?" Mira spoke again, a little more sharply this time.

"I— I understand!" Rumi stammered and bobbed her head up and down rapidly, always so frightened whenever her mate raised her voice an octave.

But Mira smiled at it the next instant, and that reassured her. "Good puppy."

Rumi bounced on her heels at the praise, but she paused to think about the rules again, and about what Mira had done. She ended up scratching her head remembering everything Mira had said.

Reluctantly, she called out to Mira. "Jagiya?"

"Yes?"

Rumi glanced around the kitchen, unsure if she should even say that or if the rules only applied to Rumi herself, but it wouldn't hurt to try. Maybe she would even earn more praises if she showed she understood the rules correctly, right?

She hesitated a little before whispering, "...You owe a coin to the swear jar."

Mira raised an eyebrow doubtfully as the silence settled between them, wondering why Rumi thought she should put a coin in the swear jar when Mira remembered she'd let slip a swear word while lecturing Rumi about not swearing.

Oh well.

She blushed as she reached into her pockets for a coin and found none, and Rumi subtly pushed one of her coins toward her mate on the counter while whispering, "Here, I'll lend you one."

"Okay. Thank you. Sorry for cursing." Mira put the coin inside the jar, still a little embarrassed by what she had done, but Rumi didn't seem to mind much at the moment.

Mira thought Rumi seemed to be enjoying the situation, actually.

/////////////////////////

Rumi was still thinking about the new rule when she went to Mira to clarify a doubt.

"Jagiya?"

"Yes, hun'?" Mira put down her book as she saw Rumi approach with the swear jar in hands and a confused look.

"If I swear while we're having sex, do I put the coin afterward or do I have to stop touching you to—?"

"Don't you fucking stop!"

Rumi paused for a moment to process the new information about the rule, assuming she should only put the new coins after sex.

But then she remembered that Mira had swore again.

And she opened the lid of the swear jar and extended one of her coins to Mira.

"...You have to put a coin again, jagiya."

Mira blushed as red as a tomato, her cheeks, ears, and nose completely red as she took the coin from Rumi's hand and threw it into the jar.

And if she threw her book at Rumi's head while she closed the jar with an amused smile on her lips, Rumi didn't say anything about it—she was busy laughing at her mate's antics.

Zoey took her hand and led her to their room. Every now and then she looked back just to make sure Rumi was there—even though she could feel her hand in hers, she wanted to see her close. So, she walked slowly to the bedroom, where she imagined she would find Mira sleeping in the middle of the bed, or perhaps reading while waiting for her, but what they saw there when they arrived was even more adorable than they expected.

Mira had taken Yuna to their room, and the two were sleeping peacefully, together in bed, enveloped in that barrier of sheets, pillows, and clothes. Zoey saw Mira doing one of those that morning, when Zoey had made the bed after she woke up, but the moment Mira saw the folded clothes and the pillows put away, she just threw everything back on the bed and went back to arranging everything the way she wanted.

Zoey noticed that Rumi also thought it was adorable; her tail wagged even more now.

“There’s room for us if you stay close to Mira and I close to Yuna,” Zoey suggested with a small smile. Rumi couldn’t take her eyes off the bed; the idea of sleeping in a nest with her whole pack made her immensely happy, and she was about to take the first step towards them when she remembered that she hadn’t showered in days. “What’s wrong, dear?”

“Hmm... I need a shower,” Rumi admitted, then raised one arm and sniffed herself to see if there wasn’t an option to wait until the next day, but if she got into bed smelling like that, Mira probably would throw her off the balcony.

“Uhh…” Zoey tugged her own shirt close to her nose when she remembered that she’d spent the last minutes clinging to Rumi and, well, she needed a shower and a change of clothes too. “Yeah, me too…”

Rumi’s tail stopped in place, a shiver running down her spine as Zoey gave her a giddy look followed by a smirk before whispering, “We better take a shower then, puppy.”

She closed the bedroom door with a soft click to avoid waking Mira and Yuna, and quickly pulled Rumi along toward the bathroom at the end of the hall, and all Rumi could do was whisper, “Yes, mate,” in response.

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After my previous eyecrimes for Ink and Honey (see below) here is a slightly more serious ARTISTE attempt in apology

anyway go read INK & HONEY by @ghostgrlonfirst it's so good ink & honey - Chapter 1 - ghostgrlonfirst - KPop Demon Hunters (2025) [Archive of Our Own]

GUYS THIS IS NOT A DRILL I JUST LEARNED KELLY CLARKSON HAS DONE A COVER OF WHAT IT SOUNDS LIKE

miss “my covers are better than your songs” HAS COVERED KPDH and MY FAV SONG FROM THE SOUNDTRACK

KILL AI AND REBLOG AND CREATE ART IN 2026

happy new year's eve! here's a zoemira ink & honey nye ficlet ♡