Lavished in Perfect Love

All I want is for you to remember. Remember the things we used to do. Saying I love you and know its true Remember the cries and laughter  Going to some places we don’t know what’s after. I hope you do think of me like I think of you Praying for me because you told me so Am I too hoping you still feel the same way too? But you can’t take that away from me though ‘Cause the only reason I feel this way is Because of you!

Please tell me it is not just me

She tried to do everything,

So everything she can be.

Even give up her whole being,

 still her flaws’ all they can see.

She shouldn’t have done it

About Loving the world and

All that there is.

Because that became her poison that kills her

Bitterly

I hope there's still someone who uses this, someone who just wants to escape their own world and just literally speak to someone who will listen. This platform helped me release my burden, to speak what I can't say, the thoughts I can't usually explain to everyone. with no one to judge (tee hee 'cause I don't think many still use this platform.)

That may be the reason why I can't put an end to some of my writings. Because how can I end it if, in the beginning, It wasn't that clear? there are a lot of things going on in my mind, and because of that, I can't put all of them together. I'm afraid.

I am scared that I've probably lost my mind. convincing myself that I am something when I have absolutely nothing to give.

Dear : to someone out there reading,

Something's dying inside of me, everything's becoming a blur. My heart bleeds so much without a gush of blood coming out.

I tried to medicate it, cure it If I can cause I've got no one who'll worry for me anyway. I've got to do it for myself, I have to be there for myself or else no one will.

Sometimes I asked myself how no one was coming to my rescue at the time I most needed it when I was always there for them but my heart is a fool, she listens, and she acts, cause she loves.

I wished I didn't so I wouldn't feel that bad when they didn't do the same way.

my heart feels so heavy right now and I feel so alone.

I feel like carrying this heavy burden, draining my energy out, my whole world still spins but only I wasn't moving. People say it'll pass yes it does, but it didn't solve anything.

I'm still an empty shell waiting to be thrown out. I can't seem to function well as the people in the world should.

Sana dumating yung araw na kapag titingnan kita hindi na puno ng galit at sakit. Sana dumating yung araw na kaya na kitang mangitian at magpasalamat sa lahat ng pinagsamahan.                                                                               

Sana dumating yung araw na pag tititigan kita di na mabigat, di na masakit, di na puno ng bakit.

Na kapag tiningnan kita hindi nalungkot ang nakakabit.

Na naging masaya tayo kahit di magkalapit, na natapos ang nakaraan at tuluyan nang isipa’y matahimik.

More of You, less of me. 

I have been troubled sleeping lately, which I’m not used to. I am the type who falls asleep within a second the moment I lay myself in comfort. No, it was not because of the coffee I drank (3 times in a day or more) ‘cause I occasionally do that and be soundly asleep. 

Might be the real trouble is not in my sleep, but deep within. I tried to daydream myself to sleep, think of happy thoughts, stories, goals and things I want and ended it till dawn wide awake. the other night I tried not to think myself through it and ended up looking up on the ceiling, then scrolling down on Facebook. 

How long will I be able to properly sleep like the way I used too? How long will I live a purposeless life till it pass through? This too shall pass they say, and I greatly believed it too, there are just some days that I don’t, still in the battle between the two. Will try my hardest to win the battle, and if I don’t, I know God will

To make it Happen. To Force its way in. To help me along the way

Hope I heal to whatever’s hurting and making me not alright. 

Hi Daughter of God, I know you’ve been so tired lately.  Having a difficulty in sleeping, holding your tears as much as you can. But I want you to know you don’t have to. You can always come in to My presence for you to be at ease, you can unload all your heavy burdens for My yoke is  easy and my burden is light and you can always cry your eyes out on Me. 

It might be hard right now, but I promise you of a place where I would use you for My glory. Mahirap man maintindihan ngayon Anak, but please put your complete trust on Me. You are my daughter and it pains Me too when you’re in pain. when you cry, I cry! There’s nothing I want more than the best for you. 

It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait!   And it doesn’t lie. If it seems slow in coming, wait.   It’s on its way. It will come right on time.  - Habbakuk 2:3 MSG 

 Don’t give up just yet. Just wait and see Anak, it will come.   

Loving you always,  GOD