this story wont write itself

at least once a day you should read a poem that slices you clean in half. and then you go to the post office or something

tumblr is like an abandoned space station & you all are the thing in the vents

not me though. im girl with tanktop

not only is it not friday it’s not even thursday. or wednesday

they want you to make fried rice

who is "they"

the wok left

how am I supposed to make fried rice if the wok left

skillet issue

i think it’s cute when someone texts you after hanging out just to say they had fun with you, idk little things like that are sweet to me

"unbecoming" is such a great word. bro that shit was so rude you no longer Are

Does anyone know what to do about the temperature and also the prices

i have princess in a tower disorder (uncontrollable isolation)

YOU don’t have to be perfect to be loved. but I do

tmi doesn't exist to me. I love information

the well ok of it all

im a simple man i like when things are shaped like other things. stool shaped like a mushroom. pillows shaped like fruit. salt and pepper shaker shaped like two friends hugging. in my ideal world i will have a house stocked entirely with novelty objects shaped like other objects and it will be beautiful.

when i was younger i had a really bad fear of danny devito when i was going to sleep so my older brother gave me a watch that he set to like 8 hours ahead so that it was always daytime on the watch when i was asleep and he told me it would confuse danny devito and he would think it was daytime and get scared of the sun and leave me alon

Your brother is the best

Who the fuck changed this from vampires to Danny devito

the real question is why I was completely ready to accept that this person had a debilitating childhood fear of Danny Devito

World Heritage Post

having institutional access never stops feeling sort of crazy to me because you can literally type in any country and time period and find at least a handful of peer reviewed articles somewhere that discuss a specific aspect of people's lives in depth and at length like "what was considered pop culture in late imperial russia" or "how did the textile trade work in northern mali in the 1600s" or "children's toys in pre-colonial philippines" and it's just sitting there but the majority of people on planet earth aren't allowed to read any of it

somebody reblogged this and said something to the effect of "even if they had access they wouldn't read it because most people watch fox news and love conspiracy theories" and you should probably know that most people on planet earth are not republicans from the united states

everything’s gonna be okay allegedly

that coffee and pastry will save your life btw