Pathos

What I discovered in New Guinea was that who we are is also reflected back to us by the people around us. George Cooley called this “the looking glass self.” As he says, “I am not what I think I am and I am not what you think I am; I am what I think that you think I am.” When I think that the people around me don’t think I am smart, funny, or kind, I start to internalize those judgments. And when I thought the people around me in New Guinea did not know who I was or what I was doing there, I found myself asking those same questions. I didn’t know who I was or what I was doing there.

The greatest obstacle to living a meaningful life is the sense that one has plenty of time left.

People hate their own art because it looks like they made it. They think if they get better, it will stop looking like they made it; a better person made it. But there's no level of skill beyond which you stop being you. You hate the most valuable thing about your art.

One day, you will wake up and there won't be any more time to do the things you've always wanted. Do it now.

A lot of people say there is no happiness in life, and certainly there's no permanent happiness. But self-sufficiency creates happiness. Happiness is a state of bliss. Just because you're satisfied one moment - saying yes, it's a good meal, makes me happy - well that's not going to necessarily be true the next hour. Life has its ups and downs, and time has to be your partner. Time is your soul mate. Children are happy. But they haven't really experienced ups and downs yet. I'm not exactly sure what happiness even means. I don't know if I personally could define it.

Too often resilience and self-reliance are considered expressions of privilege instead of habits born from adversity. For it is only the most pampered who have the luxury of taking everything personally.

'Problematic' is often a word people use when they can't articulate why they are uncomfortable with different perspectives but want to sound smart nonetheless.

Tradition is a set of solutions for which we have forgotten the problems. Throw away the solution and you get the problem back. Sometimes the problem has mutated or disappeared. Often it is still there as strong as it ever was.

The thing you want the most, is hiding behind the thing you fear the most.

Things take the time they take. Don't worry.

Beware of looking for goals: look for a way of life. Decide how you want to live and then see what you can do to make a living within that way of life.